Kids: Today, my son had a secret party. At first I was mad, then I...

By Angus - 17/09/2015 19:48 - France

Today, my son had a secret party. At first I was mad, then I had a complete and total Incredible Hulk meltdown when I realized that he had opened a bottle of very expensive whisky, originally bottled by my great great grandfather in Scotland, and used it as a mixer with fucking Pepsi. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 032

You deserved it 2 673

Winter: Snow and Funny News
Snuggle up and laugh with our winter stories, where snow isn't the only thing sliding around! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Dumbass

By Anonymous - 31/08/2024 08:00 - United Kingdom - Castleford

Today, my son tried my year great-grandad's 90 year-old whiskey, didn’t like it, and poured it all down the sink. When I confronted him, he confidently told me it was nasty and must have expired, so he did me a favour and poured it away and washed the bottle. I had to walk away and remind myself I love him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 524

You deserved it 115

By Anonymous - 07/06/2019 22:00

Today, I went into my fridge and someone had drank all the beer. Only my 8-year-old son lives with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 618

You deserved it 382

By don'tdrinkthat - 03/11/2013 22:27 - United States - Quincy

Today, I came home to find my 14-year-old son attempting to get drunk off aftershave. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 267

You deserved it 4 825

By sadmommy - 23/04/2012 22:51 - United States - Keller

Today, I discovered that last night, my son snuck downstairs at 3am, drank two glasses of my very expensive wine, threw up on his bed, and then slept in his own vomit. My son is 14. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 551

You deserved it 6 202

By A-64 - 08/05/2012 20:48 - Belgium - Brussels

Today, against my wishes, my son snuck out of my house to go partying. When he came home, I called him in so I could properly discipline him. While I was talking, he staggered to our fish tank, pulled open the lid, and vomited straight into it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 394

You deserved it 5 225

Family values

By Anonymous - 06/10/2019 12:00 - Croatia

Today, my 11-year-old cousin walked up to me as I was enjoying a glass of wine with friends at my mother's birthday party. Thinking she wouldn't like it anyway, I let her try. The little fucker drank the entire glass in one go, adding, "Usually, daddy gives me vodka." Good to know what my family is up to. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 711

You deserved it 629

By StockedWithJuice - 06/07/2013 15:14 - United States - Austin

Today, I found out that my 16-year-old son bought a huge amount of grape juice, because he thought he could store it under his bed and wait for it to turn to wine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 798

You deserved it 5 336

Time out

By nooo - 12/07/2024 15:00 - United States

Today, after a fight, my boyfriend brought me a soda that exploded when I opened it. Furious at his constant childish bullshit, I threw his ass out. Two hours later, my son confessed that he'd shaken the cans as a joke. I tried to call my boyfriend, but he'd blocked my number. FML

I agree, your life sucks 114

You deserved it 902

Chemistry

By Anonymous - 31/03/2011 22:10 - United States

Today, while searching for the pungent odor that has been lingering in my son's bedroom, I discovered various types of juice my son has been "storing" to make wine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 905

You deserved it 4 584

By diddlebuag - 27/05/2011 22:09 - United States

Today, I came home from work, only to find the babysitter passed out on the couch with a bottle of Jack Daniel's. At some point, it seems my son had taken the liberty of peeing on her while she slept. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 045

You deserved it 6 250

Feklfekl2222 32

Friday 18 September 2015 9:00

As much as it won't replace the sentimental value in the slightest I would get him to pay for two or three times the value of the whiskey, and generally make his life hell for a while

nitsud82 14

Friday 18 September 2015 9:07

Bright side, no jury in the world will convict when this goes to trial for murder.

Comments

tonijulie 20

Saturday 19 September 2015 15:02

Ouch. Damn teenagers.

likice93 7

Saturday 19 September 2015 18:30

He would be so dead and grounded he wouldn't even know what the sun looked like when it was all over

ekalfhsa 2

Saturday 19 September 2015 18:49

I'm Scottish, and this is a sad FML. Mostly for that beautiful family connection to the whisky (no 'e' for anyone wondering), but also for the Pepsi. I'm not against mixers (I know a man who only drinks whisky and irn bru). But what a way to ruin it! Eesh. Sorry OP :(

theBandit68 17

Saturday 19 September 2015 19:28

I'm sixteen and wanna beat the hell outta your son

ArkarTaylor 10

Saturday 19 September 2015 21:46

Might as well make him make Whiskey for you. If he asks how, tell the bugger to Google it

blewpanda 5

Sunday 20 September 2015 0:18

late term abort that little shit. its never to late

dragoongirl90 34

Sunday 20 September 2015 3:26

So... Much... Rage.... No... Words... Kill... Maim.... Destroy....

Taurus_ChicKa 36

Sunday 20 September 2015 4:42

Sentimental value aside, your son should not be drinking alcohol at all. If he's throwing a secret party, he obviously isn't old enough to drink, so...yeah. I won't go so far as to say it's your fault, OP, for putting the booze within access of your son, but I do hope you lectured him not only for what he did to your special drink, but for drinking at all.

gizmodorner 15

Sunday 20 September 2015 5:24

this made me cry. a branch of my family has been in the spirits business for over 100 years, and a whisky of that origin and age is irreplaceable. i am sorry for your loss. mixing any whisky that isn't rotgut is sacrilege, and if you strike the child down i shall not blame you.