Miscellaneous: Today, the fire alarm went off in my dorm. Not only was it 30... - FML

By wellhellothere - 17/04/2011 07:25 - United States

Today, the fire alarm went off in my dorm. Not only was it 30 degrees outside, but I was in the shower. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 988

You deserved it 3 320

Valentine's Day: Love and Maladresse
Discover romantic anecdotes with a touch of awkwardness - because nothing expresses love better than a little discomfort! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By Mel - 07/05/2011 22:27 - United States

Today, my fire alarm startled me so badly that I shit myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 975

You deserved it 12 964

This old house

By Anonymous - 31/08/2022 16:00

Today, the smoke alarm went off while I was in the shower. Fearing a house fire, I jumped out and ran out, wearing just a tiny towel that barely covered my modesty, only to realize that water was coming through the ceiling and on to the smoke alarm, via a leak in the shower tray. FML

I agree, your life sucks 794

You deserved it 155

By ohcollege - 01/10/2010 10:04 - United States

Today, the rain was pouring really hard outside. I found this out when it started raining on me at 4 am inside my dorm room. Thanks college. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 356

You deserved it 2 513

By YoshiSqu4d - 03/07/2019 14:01

Today, someone tripped the fire alarm at the hotel I'm currently staying at while I was taking a shit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 596

You deserved it 115

By wookieewhosshe - 19/03/2019 13:00 - United Kingdom - Sutton Coldfield

Today, my building's fire alarm went off. Unfortunately, this coincided with sexy time, and the loud alarm made me jumpy, making it extremely difficult to untie my naked boyfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 127

You deserved it 398

Disinformation

By zzyx - 22/09/2009 03:19 - United States

Today, there was a fire alarm in my dorm. Just as I was leaving my room, a lady in the hallway told me that it was a drill and they'd be inspecting rooms, so I would need to leave my door unlocked. When I came back, my room was trashed and my laptop, speakers, and jewelry were gone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 681

You deserved it 16 939

Damned freshmen

By CRC - 23/11/2011 15:38 - United States

Today, a freshman set off the fire alarm in my dorm at 2 a.m. He tried to microwave Easy Mac without adding water. I had to stand outside for 45 minutes while the firemen moved the noodles to the sink and ran cold water over them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 318

You deserved it 2 426

Weewooweewoo

By Anonymous - 19/09/2010 05:38 - United States

Today, I accidentally bumped into the fire alarm which set off a high pitched buzzing noise that could be heard throughout the entire dorm. It went on for at least two hours and none of the technicians could figure out how to turn it off. All the girls on my floor are mad at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 020

You deserved it 7 065

Weather

By Anon - 13/06/2013 02:40 - Canada - Ottawa

Today, I woke up at 3:00 am feeling freezing cold and soaking wet. It turns out that my dad had opened my window when I was sleeping, and rain water had been pouring in on me all night. My hair, face, pillow, blankets, alarm clock, and homework were all soaked as well. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 547

You deserved it 3 625

By im_a_mocker - 28/01/2009 23:35 - United States

Today, I decided to make a toaster scramble. I thought it was bad enough when the pastry fell through the grate in the toaster over. Then it burst into flames. After 5 minutes of fanning the smoke away from the smoke detector, it still went off. Now my entire dorm building is outside in a snowstorm. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 308

You deserved it 5 921

Next

Top comments

wisericky 12

Sunday 17 April 2011 13:11

YDI for not taking a shower fully dressed.

katamine 17

Sunday 17 April 2011 21:37

Farenheit is stupid... Celsius makes so much more sense

Comments

maphineRAWRS 10

Sunday 17 April 2011 16:31

so? you'll dry off quick outside in the sun!

Brax0826 0

Sunday 17 April 2011 19:40

she didn't say anything about the sun, I bet you wear a helmet and finger your own ass

jupiter80 0

Sunday 17 April 2011 23:24

76- OP said it was 30°F so I doubt there would be alot of sun

yuggi1 11

Sunday 17 April 2011 23:25

What's wrong with fingering your own ass? O.o

kasumii 1

Sunday 17 April 2011 16:47

Wow there are so many people who don't understand Fahrenheit. I guess it's not always Americans who don't know anything. 30 degrees is about -1 Celsius ... I went to an American school here so I know both pretty well, though it gets confusing when talking to others who only know one or other.

Bobissmall 13

Sunday 17 April 2011 18:04

Only 2 country's use Fahrenheit though...

perdix 29

Sunday 17 April 2011 17:04

Stay inside and stay warm for the rest of your life...really warm at the very end;)

jadenstigman 0

Sunday 17 April 2011 17:08

the guys will be happy to keep u warm don't worry and to all u Celsius users it's 0C basically.

underpaid011 0

Sunday 17 April 2011 17:41

nice! FML for you, but if your hot this is a MLIA for everyone else. today, the fire alarm at my dorm went off. when I exited the building it was 30 degrees outside. I did not notice the cold so much because this hottie had evacuated from the shower and had the pointiest nipples ever seen. my life is awesome.

tjsomethin 9

Sunday 17 April 2011 18:02

Sounds like the start of a porno

chavez12 0

Sunday 17 April 2011 18:09

soooooo

rangermedic77 5

Sunday 17 April 2011 18:48

should've just stayed in the shower, the fire wouldn't get you in the water. unless you were bathing in oil I guess

stroudie94 9

Sunday 17 April 2011 19:15

to all the Europeans saying it's warm. It's ******* America! It would be considered 0c where you are at.

Pazu_fml 10

Monday 18 April 2011 1:32

-1 is still not very cold, though. And it's not just Europeans who use Celsius; it's every single country in the world other than the US and Belize.

JJ123456 0

Sunday 17 April 2011 19:27

the water lied it gasoline >:)

1
2
3
4
5
6
7

Keywords

Miscellaneous Sleep Awkward Love Weddings Television Money Relatable Snow Transportation Annoying Family Kids Pregnancy Mental health Empathy Toxic Food Animals Cats Argument Gamers Health Valentine's Day Gross Homeowners Home improvement Babysitter Drugs Music

The Top

Today, I went out drinking with a friend I've been crushing on for a while now. After we'd been talking and had a few, she said, "Man, I haven't gotten laid in months! Do you mind?" Surprised but hopeful, I nodded. She leaned over, hugged me, and went to hit on a guy by the bar. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 879

You deserved it 5 546

Today, I was out with friends, A girl approached me out of nowhere and gave me a peck on the cheek, then yelled to my friend, "I kissed him, where's that drink you promised?" only for him to equally loudly reply, "I said I'd buy you a drink to TALK to him." Apparently, even bribery isn't enough for a woman to talk to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 950

You deserved it 111

The Top

Today, my laziness hit a new low when I tried closing my bedroom door using my mind. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 945

You deserved it 21 129

Today, I found out my boss wrote me up because he heard me crying on the phone, and that it was unprofessional. I was talking to my sister, who was telling that me my father had died. Three weeks ago, he was crying about his dog breaking his leg. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 824

You deserved it 101

Today, a guy I like tried to talk to me. I got so nervous that I had a panic attack and puked in front of him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 746

You deserved it 401

Today, my boyfriend and I were in bed and I asked him why he was with me. His answer was, "Well, the last girl I dated was really smart and she always made me feel dumb, so I decided to switch things up a bit. You make me feel like a genius, babe." FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 599

You deserved it 8 057

Today, my roommate thought it would be funny to throw a brick down the laundry-chute. Guess who spent the night at the hospital. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 467

You deserved it 1 748

Today, at a house party someone smashed and spilled their drink. In my own drunken state, I decided to get the mop as someone might fall. I then fell over it and ended up with glass in my side. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 204

You deserved it 593