Miscellaneous: Today, the last few seconds of my 2011 was spent staring at my... - FML

By Scarred4Life - 01/01/2012 06:18 - United States

Today, the last few seconds of my 2011 was spent staring at my drunk, naked uncle pouring olive oil over himself and rubbing it in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 765

You deserved it 3 521

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When the leaves fall, the laughter rises. Discover autumn stories as crisp as dried leaves! More…

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Same thing different taste

By SAM - 05/08/2018 09:00 - United States

Today, my dad gave me his old camera. I got home and eagerly turned it on to start using it. I was greeted by a photo of my father drunk, smiling, naked, and covered in peanut butter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 229

You deserved it 329

By Falling off the wagon - 09/11/2013 13:20 - United Kingdom - Brighton

Today, my uncle gave me a very expensive bottle of champagne at a celebratory family event. We were celebrating me spending 1 year sober. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 454

You deserved it 3 569

By CK95 - 01/01/2015 23:02 - United States

Today, I woke up after a night of New Year's Eve partying. I remember the night going great. What I don't remember is laying naked in the shower while my girlfriend ran water over my body to make me feel better. I also made my own funeral plans because I was convinced I was going to die. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 838

You deserved it 8 051

By vanorav - 18/03/2012 02:41 - United States - Santa Clarita

Today, I walked into the kitchen to eat some breakfast. I got a full visual of my drunk neighbor dancing naked in my backyard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 573

You deserved it 2 246

By Vlad - 21/11/2018 13:30

Today, my uncle is on vacation with his friend, who sent us a video of their hotel room. He captured a glimpse of my uncle in the shower. Naked. This can't be unseen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 042

You deserved it 300

Family values

By Anonymous - 19/09/2009 04:55 - United States

Today, I went back home. My drunk mother was screaming at my drunk step-dad about a fight that happened four years ago. My little sister was looking in the mirror practicing her "orgasm face", while the neighbors were dancing outside, coked out and naked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 86 229

You deserved it 5 382

By meeeoow - 22/01/2011 10:05 - Australia

Today, my drunken father decided to walk my quiet street naked. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 663

You deserved it 2 777

By Anonymous - 26/11/2013 16:43 - United States - Erie

Today, I had a family get-together for my birthday. I got to watch all my family members get piss-drunk and argue over who's having the worst time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 070

You deserved it 3 570

By batsu - 27/01/2012 06:48 - Canada

Today, I made a drunken bet with friends that I could pour lighter fluid on my hands, light it, and shake it out before I got burned. I lost. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 972

You deserved it 66 779

By always-the-responsible-one - 03/01/2010 08:42 - Canada

Today, I just spent half an hour cleaning up my little brother's puke after he got drunk for the first time. All the people who bought him drinks are still out partying and having a good time, while all I can smell is whiskey, Chinese food, and whatever else was in his stomach. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 625

You deserved it 3 110

Next

Top comments

elinhjortskull 7

Sunday 1 January 2012 12:09

He's sexy and he knows it.

GoWithTheFro 10

Sunday 1 January 2012 12:07

Well, at least it's been a memorable year.

Comments

alexdefran 0

Tuesday 3 January 2012 3:33

Very nice.

JazzyFinnie 5

Tuesday 3 January 2012 7:19

My Scottish uncle was drunk in a kilt and flashed the whole family at his wedding. Men don't wear anything under kilts.

codieisdank 0

Wednesday 4 January 2012 11:05

Sketch.

demonmonkey 13

Thursday 5 January 2012 6:28

Kinky;)

insanelyXnikki 18

Saturday 7 January 2012 22:31

Hahahah I wish my new years had been even half as exciting as that.

radiariad 0

Sunday 8 January 2012 6:26

Y did u even look?!?

awesomegerf 7

Monday 9 January 2012 9:01

I bet ur scarred for life

maddyyghee 6

Tuesday 24 January 2012 9:33

****** up family. soz

aquaman95 7

Tuesday 3 July 2012 14:08

wtf

caseykruy 4

Friday 29 March 2013 18:12

Well...it's a good story to tell

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Surprise Love Cute My ex Texting Awkward Wanker Intimacy Sex Mental health Health Insomnia Sleep Food Cooking Kids Parents Weekend Pranks Annoying Miscellaneous Work Embarrassing Technology Zoom Coworkers Argument Roommate Pizza Animals

The Top

Today, I was looking at myself in the mirror and tried to touch my face. Unfortunately I have Tourette's, so my hand just uncontrollably slammed into my cheek, consequently jamming one of my fingernails into it. It started bleeding like crazy. My fingernails aren't exactly long, either… that's how hard it hit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 287

You deserved it 51

Today, I started my day with terrible food poisoning and ending my day alone, with a boyfriend in jail. We've had one short conversation since he was arrested. My birthday is in three days, and we have no idea if he will be released in time because of the system working slowly. FML

I agree, your life sucks 155

You deserved it 419

The Top

Today, a first date with a guy went so badly that he actually paid me to never call him again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 501

You deserved it 5 391

Today, my boyfriend and I went for a ride in a paddle-boat. He decided it would be fun to paddle near the fountain. The fountain decided it would be fun to shower me, him and all of our things in filthy, stinking duck water. I had to ride the bus home by myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 830

You deserved it 4 128

Today, I was beating the hell out of one of the most useless employees ever. I mean really laying into him, all while telling him for the umpteenth time how to do his job right. Then my husband informed me I was hitting him in my sleep. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 138

You deserved it 7 375

Today, artwork that I had been working on for months was destroyed, leaving me almost in tears. The culprit? A lonely pigeon who'd got into the room and shat all over it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 182

You deserved it 5 082

Today, my mom let my younger brother borrow my car. He managed to crash it through the garage door. While I was in another country. Somehow, I manage to get berated by my mom because I'm not doing enough to make my brother feel better about him having an accident involving my car and my house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 762

You deserved it 348

Today, while playing a game, my girlfriend told a bunch of our friends that she's never had an orgasm. News to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 406

You deserved it 5 117