Intimacy: Today, the man I love still thinks that female orgasms are a...

FML for mobile
Free

By ksamp - 12/10/2011 04:26 - United States

Today, the man I love still thinks that female orgasms are a myth and refuses to even try to give me one. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 316

You deserved it 6 292

Mother's Day: Sweets and Bummers
Between disastrous breakfasts in bed and unusual gifts, Mother's Day is an inexhaustible source of laughter. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By BustedEgo - 23/03/2014 05:31 - United States - Norway

Today, my boyfriend told me he doesn't know what it's like to be turned on. Apparently, I've been doing something wrong for the past two years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 829

You deserved it 7 331

By jasmine - 23/02/2010 16:48 - United States

Today, I realized I have the most amazing boyfriend in the world. Too bad he has never once made me orgasm in the two and a half years we've been together. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 715

You deserved it 7 694

Keep on going!

By Anonymous - 03/04/2012 02:07 - United States - Lincolnton

Today, my boyfriend told me that he'd never made a girl orgasm. I didn't think much of it until he decided to go down on me. Every time he got me close to orgasm, he'd stop and ask, "Are you about to come?" or "Does that feel good?" Now I can see why he's never made a girl orgasm. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 270

You deserved it 3 958

By Enni - 27/08/2016 08:47

Today, my husband told me that, "a girl's orgasm serves no purpose". FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 699

You deserved it 1 540

It's not you, it's him

By Anonymous - 02/10/2021 23:01 - Italy - Benevento

Today, after telling my boyfriend I never achieved an orgasm with any of my past partners, and therefore telling him what I need to get there, he won't even touch me, let alone do anything "down there" because he has never done it on any of his past girlfriends, and thinks it's gross. I make sure to always be fresh and clean. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 193

You deserved it 284

By Anonymous - 06/07/2009 19:21 - United States

Today, being on my boyfriend's street bike for ten minutes gave me an orgasm. My boyfriend of three years, who constantly tries so hard to get me to, has never given me an orgasm. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 257

You deserved it 7 292

By Gabi - 20/02/2012 14:23 - United States

Today, my boyfriend would rather jerk off than have sex with me. Even if I'm next to him in bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 280

You deserved it 6 563

Communication breakdown

By Jen - 20/03/2012 05:11 - United States - Woodland Hills

Today, my new boyfriend asked why it takes me so long to reach orgasm. I didn't have the heart to tell him that he's never even given me one. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 006

You deserved it 7 319

What a wuss

By Anonymous - 30/03/2021 08:01

Today, my boyfriend flat out refuses to ever give me oral because it grosses him out when I squirt, and there's no way he wants that anywhere near his face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 606

You deserved it 336

Sweet summer child

By Anonymous - 06/06/2022 05:00 - United Kingdom

Today, my boyfriend has so many hang ups about being good at sex that when we actually had sex for the first time this morning, he got upset that I was touching my clit while he was inside me. Apparently it was a sign I think he’s bad at it, and had to do it myself. Neither of us orgasmed today. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 085

You deserved it 286

rattusrattus 18

Wednesday 12 October 2011 11:09

Any man who refused to attempt to make me ****** would be drop-kicked out the door. They're ******* awesome.

dreamering 16

Wednesday 12 October 2011 11:27

Kick him in the balls and say that the pain is a myth.

Comments

Spydre 7

Tuesday 29 November 2011 21:05

Dump him!

Katherinee11 4

Friday 2 December 2011 21:38

I wouldn't give him one then, what an ignorant tool.

EdifierArtist 3

Saturday 10 December 2011 21:45

Remind us why you love him again?

winterforever97 30

Tuesday 27 December 2011 2:23

Your boyfriend sucks.

BetYourMad 0

Saturday 31 December 2011 7:22

What a great guy!!

chexican79 3

Thursday 5 January 2012 16:01

Maybe he's just compensating for the fact that he cant give one

noelteen 2

Tuesday 14 February 2012 4:10

Date a lesbian! We know they're not myths!

dmadsen33 9

Thursday 8 November 2012 14:32

Yes, yes we do!

sellout39 0

Thursday 24 May 2012 6:56

blow jobs could become a myth too if thats how he wants to be

Evilbear 16

Sunday 12 August 2012 14:12

refuse to give him orgasms too

BeezKnees 5

Monday 5 November 2012 2:18

Time for a new boyfriend.

FML on Facebook

Keywords

Embarrassing Music Cute Work AITA Money Client relations Cops Kids Weird Cheating Renters Love Landlords Friends Transportation Cars Star Wars Bullying School My ex Ironic Intimacy Sex Parents Annoying Awkward Health Healthy Lifestyle Parenting

The Top

Today, my future mother-in-law started shit-talking me on Facebook, and we got into a heated argument. She called me later in the day, saying I'll be lucky if I ever marry her son and that, "You'll suffer to your last breath." I'm now terrified to set foot outside. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 241

You deserved it 6 038

Today, I was having sex with my girlfriend doggy-style and noticed a piece of toilet paper had been "left behind". I had such a bad internal conflict about whether to tell her or to remove it myself, I went limp. She started crying and accused me of not being attracted to her anymore. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 972

You deserved it 1 664

The Top

Today, my wife made a joke about the size of my package, so figuring all's fair in love and war, I bought some laxatives to prank her with. They took a lot longer to work than I thought, and I ended up lying in bed, listening to my wife shitting her guts out in the bathroom for over an hour. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 411

You deserved it 57 923

Today, I was stuck on a campus tour with my subtly racist mother who, in an attempt to seem open-minded, deemed it appropriate to refer to our black tour guide as "Sistah". FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 103

You deserved it 4 002

Today, I was driving when I saw a spider hanging from the ceiling of my car. I'm terrified of spiders, so I was watching it instead the road. When I looked back at the road, I had just enough time to swerve to miss the fire hydrant but not the tree. Even the cops laughed at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 114

You deserved it 32 253

Today, while I was delivering pizza in the torrential downpour, I waited 5 minutes in the pouring rain for an old lady to dig 20 bucks out of her purse. Her total was $19.99. She told me to keep the change and make lots of money. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 819

You deserved it 3 551

Today, my insomnia wins. I'm too wired and awake to sleep, but too stoned on my sleeping pills to get up and do something productive. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 534

You deserved it 4 687

Today, I spilled the bowl of cat food I'd just filled. I picked it all up in front of my cat, but he refused to eat any of it. I had to put the food back into the packet and fill the bowl all over again. My cat is a prince. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 696

You deserved it 6 041