Animals: Today, there was a huge spider on my ceiling, so I grabbed a...

By lacsmac2 - 01/11/2015 14:10 - Australia

Today, there was a huge spider on my ceiling, so I grabbed a shoe to deal with it. Just as I jumped up to smush it, my idiot brother flicked the light off. I missed the spider, but it didn't miss my face as the impact caused it to fall. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 614

You deserved it 2 684

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Same thing different taste

By jillydark6609 - 19/09/2010 06:21 - United States

Today, I found a big spider on my wall. I have arachnophobia, and I was trying to kill it with my shoe. I pulled back and hit myself in the face, causing me to fall backwards. The spider is still alive somewhere in my house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 287

You deserved it 14 264

Leave spiders to chill

By Anonymous - 17/12/2020 14:07

Today, I saw a spider in my room. I got a piece of paper to try and put it outside. As I reached, it jumped out of nowhere and landed on my face. My reaction was to smack where the spider was - my face. I fell on the floor disoriented. The spider got away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 731

You deserved it 323

Adapt, improvise, overcome

By Arthur B. - 24/09/2019 12:01

Today, I saw a spider in my kitchen. Freaked, but trying to be humane, I held out a piece of paper so it would climb on, and I would then put it outside. However, it jumped out of nowhere and landed on my face. My reaction was to whack at where the spider was - my face. I stumbled around, disoriented; the spider got away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 352

You deserved it 464

He was just chillin'

By Anonymous - 04/07/2021 13:59

Today, I was taking a shower when I noticed the huge spider above my head. Now, being the smart person I am, I sprayed the water up at it, causing it to fall. Right on my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 352

You deserved it 1 011

By eebie jeebies - 30/05/2016 15:31 - United States - Cypress

Today, a spider crawled across my arm. After a quick dance in a fit of panic, I managed to scramble onto my bed. I thought I would stand up to see if I could spot the spider and maybe kill it. I was then promptly knocked unconscious by my ceiling fan. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 483

You deserved it 3 180

By spiderwoman - 15/04/2011 11:47 - United Kingdom

Today, I saw a spider crawling across a poster in my bedroom, so I smacked the spot below it to scare the spider into climbing back up the wall. Instead, because the poster wasn't completely flat to the wall, I catapulted the spider straight into my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 299

You deserved it 32 194

By Anonytard - 02/03/2014 22:38 - Canada - Toronto

Today, I tried to kill a spider by throwing a shoe at it. All it did was slice the spider's egg sac open, releasing all its babies. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 709

You deserved it 15 130

By lexii - 05/05/2012 05:01 - United States

Today, while trying to kill a spider in my kitchen, I thought it would be wise to throw a bottle at it. The bottle hit the wall, bounced off the fridge and hit me in the face. The lucky spider crawled away, and is surely still laughing somewhere. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 742

You deserved it 30 887

By NaniNarcotic - 16/08/2011 10:17 - Australia

Today, I thought it'd be funny to knee my sister's ass as she was bending over. What I didn't realise was that she was trying to pick up a spider. In shock, she threw it in the air and it landed on my chest. I ran into a wall trying to get it off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 881

You deserved it 73 493

By Anonymous - 14/03/2010 20:30 - United States

Today, while taking a shower, a spider fell from the ceiling onto my foot. I took down my shower head to wash it down the drain, and in the process, got soap in my eye and rammed my head into the wall. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 662

You deserved it 8 343

lexiieeex3 32

Monday 2 November 2015 0:20

Did your brother flick the switch off on purpose? That would be a major dick move. You don't **** with people when spiders are involved.

katelng09 16

Monday 2 November 2015 0:17

Spiders are dicks

Comments

loueasy 23

Monday 2 November 2015 4:27

YDI for trying to kill an innocent spider.

bushada 18

Monday 2 November 2015 4:52

Considering you live in Australia I'm surprised you're alive to share this story OP.

teacupofsunshine 29

Monday 2 November 2015 5:32

As I read this fml I couldn't help myself to look around if there was a spider near me ..gave me the no feeling.

Rintarok5 29

Monday 2 November 2015 8:12

Sorry mate, but you're going to have to burn your face off, but not before you throw the spider on your bro for being a dick.

lavapants 15

Monday 2 November 2015 10:55

YDI for trying to squash the spider.

stewpididiot 11

Monday 2 November 2015 13:12

you're all idiots...leave the spiders alone and they will leave you alone .

Drummergurl92 5

Monday 2 November 2015 17:44

Your brother is a Dick lol should unleash a bunch of spiders on him when he's sleeping see how he likes it.

thetruckboy 6

Monday 2 November 2015 18:29

how hard did you kick your bro in the balls?

kaymo2 21

Monday 2 November 2015 19:47

I feel so bad for spiders, they kill gross germ-carrying flies yet people still hate them and try to kill them

Jenbearish 23

Monday 2 November 2015 20:33

That sucks. I'm hoping it was just a huntsman (pretty friendly, no interest in hurting anyone). It's the little, down low ones you've got to watch out for.