Transportation: Today, there were no more seats on the bus I was taking home,...

By nevergoingonabusagain - 30/05/2009 06:52 - Canada

Today, there were no more seats on the bus I was taking home, which meant I had to stand. I noticed that a creepy guy sitting in front of me had a boner, so I took a few steps back. Suddenly the bus went through something like a speed bump, which caused me to fall and sit on the man's lap. FML

I agree, your life sucks 77 263

You deserved it 5 711

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 22/05/2019 16:00

Today, on the bus, water kept dripping on my head so I stood up to move. As I got up, the bus turned round a corner and I fell over into a man's lap. When I tried to get up, I slipped down between his legs and the next seat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 714

You deserved it 224

By Justme - 30/06/2016 18:20 - United States - Missoula

Today, while I was riding the bus to work, I noticed the guy sitting across from me had shorts on. He also had no underwear on and I could fully see his "parts" just hanging there. I decided to switch seats but as I stood up to move, the bus jerked. I fell face forward right into his "parts". FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 124

You deserved it 1 482

By alice - 14/02/2011 01:18 - United Kingdom

I agree, your life sucks 30 323

You deserved it 3 552

By gringa_Peru - 18/04/2009 01:19 - Peru

Today, I had the good fortune of finding a seat on the bus, not the norm in Peru. Several minutes after sitting down, I felt something on my shoulder. Thinking it was a hand, I turned my head to look. I came face to face with a dirty man's crotch, it was his erection resting on my shoulder. FML

I agree, your life sucks 170 212

You deserved it 9 867

By scarlet - 09/05/2011 15:02 - Canada

Today, on the bus, a large smelly man was sat next to me, pushing me against the divider and sliding into me on every turn. When he got up for his stop, his pants had loosened and his bare ass was staring me in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 895

You deserved it 3 412

Three's a crowd

By Anonymous - 13/08/2014 11:33 - Australia - Rooty Hill

Today, I succeeded in getting a seat on a crowded bus. I regretted this when, after a couple of stops, a big guy boarded the bus and stood next to me with his penis pressed against my shoulder. Longest. Bus ride. Ever. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 680

You deserved it 4 020

By Chris - 22/10/2009 04:57 - Canada

Today, I was riding the bus home from college. I was standing in the aisle and there was a rather cute girl sitting next to me. The bus came to an abrupt stop, I tripped, and fell into her lap. She shrieked, "Eww! Get off me!" and shove me onto the floor of the bus. Nice to know I'm revolting. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 419

You deserved it 4 881

By Anonymous - 06/12/2013 18:15 - Norway - Ytre Arna

Today, I got on the bus. Before I could make it to a free seat, the driver hit the gas, and the sudden movement caused me to stumble and accidentally grab onto another passenger for support. She didn't appreciate this, accused me of molesting her, and got me thrown back off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 206

You deserved it 3 009

By marlow - 15/01/2009 02:25 - Canada

Today, the guy sitting beside me on the bus fell asleep and just drooled on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 866

You deserved it 2 717

Pervy

By nameless - 09/11/2010 19:00 - United Kingdom

Today, I got on a bus that was so overcrowded I had to stand next to the driver with nothing to hang on to. A drunk man got on and for the rest of the half hour journey continuously fell on me. When I got off, he smiled and told me as the doors were closing, "The last twelve times was for fun." FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 103

You deserved it 2 920

ilikeboys 0

Saturday 30 May 2009 16:08

if you took a few steps back wouldn't it have been kinda hard to fall in his lap since he's a couple seats in front of you?

microfilms 0

Saturday 30 May 2009 16:09

how did you manage to turn yourself around to sit on his lap if you were facing him. it would have made more sense if you fell onto him face forward.

Comments

gosef 1

Sunday 1 August 2010 8:57

I agree w/ 3 & 5 and also why were you staring at his dick? you sound like the creeper. staring at someones dick then lying about "falling" on it

myunicornbarfedo 0

Sunday 24 October 2010 4:37

well hey at least your face didnt catapult into his balls.

kookoo831 0

Monday 21 March 2011 4:43

bet u liked it

Leser98 0

Sunday 17 April 2011 5:02

wow faker

Dark_Angel003 0

Sunday 19 June 2011 7:38

Butt Sex!!

bridgetv25 8

Wednesday 7 November 2012 4:30

Hmm if ur walking backwards away from the guy how does a speed bumb make u fall backwards onto his lap?

Beans12345 5

Saturday 27 April 2013 4:44

Magic?

yzabella 4

Friday 1 August 2014 6:55

oo that must have been hard on you

taintedtruffle 42

Saturday 18 October 2014 15:45

having a boner doesn't automatically make you creepy ... guys can't control that

StickyPickles 33

Wednesday 6 May 2015 11:04

Surprise but sex??

dragoongirl90 34

Wednesday 22 June 2016 0:33

Why weren't you holding on to something?

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The Top

Today, I was driving down the road when a dog suddenly ran across the street. In attempt to spare its life, I swerved to the side of the road and rear-ended another car. The car I hit belonged the family who owned the dog. Now I have to pay them because I saved their dog's life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 352

You deserved it 5 958

Today, my estranged wife threatened to slit her wrist with a razor blade if I did not send her $50,000. She sent me a picture of her pressing a Gillette Safety razor to her wrist. It looked like she was getting ready to shave her perpetually hairy arms. She never was the sharpest knife in the drawer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 381

You deserved it 76

The Top

Today, my boss told me that he’d hired me because he thought I looked intelligent. He then went on to say that it was about time that I proved that I was. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 223

You deserved it 1 501

Today, I switched cell phone carriers and got the plan where you can call or text any five people for free. The employee asked for my five, I could only come up with one, my mom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 049

You deserved it 5 090

Today, I've got a bad stomach ache, so my mother asked me ifI was on my period. I told her that no, in fact I haven't had it in three months. Now she won't speak to me because she's convinced that I have a secret boyfriend and am pregnant. I'm a lesbian. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 022

You deserved it 566

Today, I went to the bank to deposit the cash I made waiting tables. While the teller was counting, I apologized for having so many small bills. She said "It's OK honey, I helped another one of your kind just the other day. You're lucky we take your dirty money." She thought I was a stripper. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 343

You deserved it 4 589

Today, after 5 years of marriage, my once-gym-mad husband is now so unfit that even standard missionary sex makes him so breathless and light headed, he has to stop in case he passes out. He hasn’t given me an orgasm in over a year and yet he insists nothing's wrong with him, and that I’m just being mean. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 361

You deserved it 271

Today, on the brink of a stiflingly hot summer, I've come to a terrible realisation. It seems the apartment I've just moved into has been specially insulated to trap enough heat inside for the occupants to survive the planet's next Ice Age. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 974

You deserved it 2 530

Same thing different taste

Three's a crowd

Pervy

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