Health: Today, to keep me from "getting fatter", my roommate raided the...

By anonymous - 08/10/2011 20:40 - United States

Today, to keep me from "getting fatter", my roommate raided the kitchen. She ate everything from cookies and ice cream to deli meat. The only thing left in the house are vegetables. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 560

You deserved it 17 497

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Same thing different taste

By ohnolunch - 05/03/2009 20:12 - United States

Today, I came back to my apartment to see that my roommate had left out bread, deli meat, and cheese on the counter, and made myself a sandwich. When she came back, she informs me that she found bugs in the fridge and took out all the food she thought would be contaminated. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 741

You deserved it 15 973

Treasure hunt

By Klarissa - 18/09/2024 09:00 - United States - Milwaukee

Today, I told my roommate that I was trying to lose weight, so she kindly removed all the junk food from the kitchen. I just found it all hidden under her bed. Apparently, she didn’t trust me enough to resist temptation, and she was absolutely correct. FML

I agree, your life sucks 101

You deserved it 652

By Weasel123 - 26/10/2012 07:58 - United States - Anadarko

Today, my roommate decided to go vegan after watching a PETA video. She began this new-found lifestyle by throwing out all of the non-vegan items in the house, including some prime rib we had recently purchased, all of our ice cream, and my chocolate stash. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 946

You deserved it 2 352

By stillsick - 02/03/2011 00:11 - Canada

Today, surprisingly, my roommate made a nice meal. Within an hour, I started throwing up. When I confronted her, she confessed that she'd used long expired ingredients, including meat, because she didn't want the garbage men to think she's "the type that wastes food." FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 473

You deserved it 3 259

By merrymary - 07/01/2012 11:11 - United States

Today, I moved in with my new roommate. She's a vegetarian, and won't let me put my meat in the fridge because it will "contaminate her food". FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 736

You deserved it 6 053

Go vegan

By Done - 24/11/2020 05:02 - Italy

Today, my roommate decided to go vegan and threw all of MY meats, cheeses, chocolates and even beans for some reason in the trash, because he "doesn't need that kind of toxic waste" in his life. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 121

You deserved it 88

By roomatewoes - 01/04/2013 00:45 - United States - Northfield

Today, I came back to my dorm to find my roommate forgot to get rid of her massive amounts of cheese before break. She did, however, remember to unplug the refrigerator. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 708

You deserved it 2 114

Roommates from Hell

By Snoodist - 06/05/2019 20:00

Today, as usual, I got home to find that my roommate had eaten all my groceries and left a mess behind for me to clean. To be fair, this time she did some cleaning - she "energy cleansed" my room with a sage wand, burning a huge hole in my mattress in the process. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 106

You deserved it 154

By Anonymous - 30/09/2011 15:12 - Canada

Today, my roommate was packing up her kitchen stuff as she prepared to move out. Apparently that included the majority of things I bought last week to replace all of her stuff she is taking. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 398

You deserved it 3 012

By Anonymous - 21/05/2019 14:11

Today, I ate dinner sitting on the floor. My petty roommate got pissed off during the weekend and decided the appropriate action would be to lock all the furniture in her room and refuse to give it back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 778

You deserved it 198

mozeltov 7

Sunday 9 October 2011 1:49

See, that's what I do to help me lose weight, eat all the unhealthy stuff, and leave the healthy stuff for me to eat later

cBlackout 13

Sunday 9 October 2011 1:51

Time to plot your revenge over a nice carrot.

Comments

mirlil 0

Monday 10 October 2011 22:32

what ever works

peacelovepink26 0

Monday 10 October 2011 22:36

all i can say is that you are very lucky you got an awesome roommate like that. I mean, r u kidding? He/she cares enough about you she took away the treats and fatty food? i say ur lucky.

someblackguy 3

Tuesday 11 October 2011 0:32

maybe she was just trying to eat everything because she had the munchies

nonamericandolla 6

Tuesday 11 October 2011 7:43

Is that a bad thing? At leat she will gain weight while u lose weight!

howdmynosego 12

Wednesday 12 October 2011 13:33

Get a patato out and make chips

jefffluffingham 5

Friday 21 October 2011 22:40

your roommate is a god of the gastrointestinal system. also, hope to shit you don't have protein deficiency.

RAUN 8

Saturday 3 December 2011 4:23

Go out and get some more of those chocolates, the ones found in the drug section. Make a nice meat sauce or tuna salad and tell roomie, "hands off." The pet section has a nice supply of canned meats.