And you just compounded the blunder my sharing that with the rest of us. Just as some of us are considering adding that service to our skill set, you bring up this nightmare scenario! Now, I don't know when I'll actually do it, but I'll continue to study the training videos.

Always be safe, Plexico. Clothespin your nose when submerging to prepare for the Dutch Oven, though I see no way to avoid swallowing a mouthful of fanny gas. Good luck with your further escapades, Plex.

Yes, Witchcraft, let's agree that "fanny gas" is not a good candidate for our trans-Atlantic telegustation experiments. That is one of those very funny British/American misunderstandings. In the U.S., "fanny" is a cute word for "buttocks." You can use it with children, it is so bland and inane. In the U.K., it means "******" and maybe you can fill us in about the relative vulgarity of the term. Brits are often amazed when they see American parents tell their kids, "I'm going to smack your fanny!" Of course, you all casually talk about "smoking a fag."

No, no, please don't send me any farts via PM or trans-Atlantic telegustation. I'd hate to think how those smelled after going through that process. Well, when our vaginas are indeed smacked, we DO like to go around and brag about it. Though if we do it in the wrong places (say, a school), we get those odd looks you're talking about. Ah, I don't smoke, but sometimes I do like to post that phrase just to see what people will say. My favorite is when US Americans who don't know what it means in the UK say "me too".

"US Americans" Is that from that girl that said "like such as South Africa, and, uh, the Iraq" and "people in our nation don't HAVE maps?" I had that as a ringtone on my phone, but it was too annoying after the second call.

No, no, no. :] That was my attempt to distinguish between different countries in North America, like such as, uh.

You ought to look that video up. Her name is Caitlin Upton and it was from the Miss Teen USA pageant. I was flipping through the channels and happened to tune in the moment that question was asked. You might think I habitually watch the Miss Teen USA pageant, but I don't. I don't have time to wait for a wardrobe malfunction, especially when the internet has other resources. You'll never think of the phrase "U. S. Americans" the same after that.

But when you wait for a wardrobe malfunction and finally get one, wouldn't that make it more special? :] It might give me a headache to watch some dumb broad make a fool out of herself on national television. Although, if I can put up with Lindsay Lohan's infuriating face all over the tabloids, I could probably handle this.

You know I also saw the Janet Jackson wardrobe malfunction live. No one else was paying attention, so there was no one to ask, "Did I see what I just thought I saw?" They turned off the lights so fast anyways! After that, they do all live stuff on a delay, so pervs like me have no hope. I heard Janet Jackson farted in Justin Timberlake's face and that's why he ripped the whole top off.

I suppose when a guy sees Janet's titty he might appreciate it, but when he looks up and sees her face - well, it's almost as though Michael had finally achieved his dream of a full plastic surgery package and opted for breast implants. As for Justin, I can't say I blame him for getting upset. I'd imagine Janet's fart smell like the end of the world - and covering them up with her odourous perfume doesn't cut it!