Miscellaneous: Today, while at a local river, I had been pulled underwater by...

By lifesuck - 19/09/2010 14:11 - United States

Today, while at a local river, I had been pulled underwater by a very fast and strong current. While fighting for my life, I had let go of my sandals so I could pull myself up. After explaining to my mom what had happened to me, her response was "YOU LOST YOUR SANDALS!?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 573

You deserved it 3 776

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

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Same thing different taste

Help!

By Anonymous - 07/05/2012 05:25 - United States - North Bergen

Today, I went to a river near my house. They have several swing ropes that you grab and then jump into the river. As I was about to let go of the rope, my leg got tangled and I was held underwater. My mom watched and laughed for a while before she came to help me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 644

You deserved it 3 058

Save me!

By Zorah - 31/08/2023 04:00 - United States - Fort Lauderdale

Today, I went to the beach with friends. While splashing around in the ocean and waving to my friends who were sitting on the sand, I got caught in a strong current and had to be rescued by a lifeguard. They gave me a wristband that said, "Needs Adult Supervision". FML

I agree, your life sucks 543

You deserved it 318

By NotDrunk - 11/09/2012 06:47 - United States - San Diego

Today, I was at a family dinner, which had gone into meltdown after my aunt said something sarcastic about my mother's drinking. I went out for some fresh air and stumbled about in the dark, unaware of the fact that a pool was being dug. I fell into the huge hole and lost a shoe. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 755

You deserved it 2 603

By Anonymous - 05/09/2009 07:22 - United States

Today, while I was at the beach I decided to go into the ocean even though the waves looked rough. While I was in the water, I got caught by the riptide and needed to be saved. The reason I was at the beach? I'm a lifeguard. Now all my co-workers won't stop laughing at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 111

You deserved it 18 089

Family vacation!

By Ungrateful brat - 06/06/2024 09:00 - United States

Today, at the beach, my son was screaming and crying because the sand was burning his feet. I told him to put on his sandals. He got mad and threw them in the ocean, then started crying harder when he realized they were gone. He's now hiding under the bed in the condo and is refusing to come out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 451

You deserved it 202

By water fail - 28/01/2016 11:42 - New Zealand - Auckland

Today, it was an extremely hot day so I hit up the beach for a swim. Just as I entered the water, the first wave approached me. I tried to jump it and lost my footing, managing to dislocate my hip. I had to be dragged from the water by the lifeguards. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 421

You deserved it 2 325

By Higgs - 02/06/2009 19:10 - United States

Today, I went to the pool. When I hit the water the top of my swimsuit came off so I tried to put it on underwater. The lifeguard thought I was drowning and pulled me out in front of everyone. Topless. FML

I agree, your life sucks 68 148

You deserved it 6 230

Baywatch music starts

By Anonymous - 01/05/2019 12:00

Today, I nearly drowned. I was at a wave pool for the first time and stupidly swam out to the deep end. When the waves turned on, I discovered I can't swim in rough water. Despite my yelling, "Help!" and flailing around, the lifeguard paid me no attention. My friend had to save me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 069

You deserved it 622

By paymeinhugs - 17/03/2009 01:04 - United States

Today, I was swimming in the ocean with my best friend and a giant wave came and knocked off the bottom of my bikini. My friend told me that she would go get another bottom so I could walk onto the very crowded beach. She left me for half an hour, laughing from the shore with her entire family. FML

I agree, your life sucks 89 532

You deserved it 6 347

By Anonymous - 19/12/2012 17:19 - Australia - Perth

Today, my friend and I decided to go skinny-dipping in her pool just after we'd finished watching a scary movie. While we were in the pool, I heard something move in the bushes so I freaked out and ran onto the deck, slipping and falling flat on my back. Her dad saw the whole thing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 434

You deserved it 37 127

Macromartyr 3

Sunday 19 September 2010 19:04

Were they purple?

sirbrainiac 2

Sunday 19 September 2010 19:05

those sandals cost 10 bucks!!!

Comments

karmaslave 5

Monday 20 September 2010 17:08

Those sandals were ******* delicious.

flexicano 0

Monday 20 September 2010 22:06

Fighting for your life? That's a bit melodramatic...

jjrebel26 0

Tuesday 21 September 2010 0:41

ydi for losing your sandals

Lenoraa 0

Tuesday 21 September 2010 1:13

sounds like my mom

Tarvo1 0

Tuesday 21 September 2010 16:38

YDI it for being ignorant of the currents in a 'local river', you should be aware. Also, YDI for wearing sandals.

Mochi95 0

Wednesday 22 September 2010 3:17

Sounds like something my mom would do. xD I mean, yeah, she'd be concerned but in the end that sounds just like something she would say.

doggie3 0

Thursday 23 September 2010 4:13

i rhink "fighting for your life" might be a little extreme.

dt13_fml 0

Saturday 2 July 2011 23:32

deserved it. you shouldn't lose your sandals

OhhTaylorJade 0

Thursday 3 November 2011 3:53

She care for you and your safety deeply.

drayloon 50

Saturday 29 December 2012 8:54

priorities. she's got them straight.

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The Top

Today, I noticed a flashy car badly parking itself in a handicapped space. I hate the asshats who do this, so I went up to berate the driver. After an opening salvo of coarse language, a glint of light on his wheelchair in the back caught my eye. I then had to apologise for being a shitehawk. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 623

You deserved it 42 687

Today, I got a call from my boyfriend. He was at the police station for breaking into a model home to hook up with the girl he's been cheating on me with for the past four months. I was his one phone call. He was expecting me to bail him out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 107

You deserved it 3 775

The Top

Today, I went bowling with my mom and she paid for 2 games. By the 6th frame of game 1 she was bored and to get her money back for both games she told the employees I shit my pants. I'm 17. FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 373

You deserved it 3 759

Today, after my grandma did some early Halloween costume shopping, I witnessed her modeling a "sexy nurse" outfit. After seeing her bare thighs and most of her ass, I don't think I can eat cottage cheese ever again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 525

You deserved it 5 061

Today, it's my 21st birthday. All my friends showed up at my house already drunk, so I had to be the designated driver. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 169

You deserved it 3 901

Today, my mom screamed at me for not cleaning out the coffee machine. When I told her that wasn’t part of my chores and she never asked me to do it, she screamed at me for not doing it out of the kindness of my heart. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 547

You deserved it 412

Today, just before a job interview, I coughed so violently that I lost my voice. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 216

You deserved it 2 112

Today, I went bowling. The guy at the lane next to us was bowling by himself and had a few of his own bowling balls, and he had one that looked like a yin-yang and it looked very cool spinning down the lane into the pins. Not really thinking, I casually said to him "Hey, I like your balls." FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 682

You deserved it 56 763