Work: Today, while bussing at my restaurant job, I felt a cold, wet...

By Anonymous - 23/07/2012 15:41 - United States - Apex

Today, while bussing at my restaurant job, I felt a cold, wet animal slither down my leg. I started shrieking loudly and dancing dementedly to get it off, and everyone in the restaurant turned to stare. Then I realized there was a hole in my pocket and some quarters had slid out down my leg. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 031

You deserved it 8 257

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Same thing different taste

By spoton - 26/01/2017 16:00

Today, I sliced my finger on the register drawer. Not wanting to freak out my customer, I stuck my hand in my pocket and finished giving them change. Now I look like I period-bled through the front of my pants. Only 10 hours to go. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 793

You deserved it 857

By ms98 - 05/08/2014 04:52 - Australia - Adelaide

Today, I was shopping when I suddenly slipped on the wet floor and my basket and my groceries were flung everywhere. Moments later, one of the cleaners walked over holding a "wet floor" sign, saw me and laughed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 754

You deserved it 3 684

Slipping up

By Anonymous - 06/04/2024 05:00 - United States - Richardson

Today, while I was at work, I didn't have any panty liners so I used tissue. I was taking orders when I suddenly felt the tissue trailing down my leg. I tried not to move, but it inevitably fell through my pants onto the floor in front of my co-workers. I swiftly put it into my pocket. Luckily, it had nothing on it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 456

You deserved it 145

By tori210 - 15/08/2017 16:00

Today, I was walking out of work. I felt like everyone was staring at me but brushed it off. It wasn't until I got home that I realized I had toilet paper sticking out of my pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 472

You deserved it 710

Surprise strike

By Anonymous - 28/06/2020 20:02

Today, as I was walking home with dinner, a pigeon pooped on my leg like a dive bomb. My hands were full carrying the food, so I had to walk the rest of the way with a smear on my jeans that everyone knew what it was. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 367

You deserved it 190

By yesikilledit - 20/11/2018 13:30

Today, I woke up and saw a piece of black fuzz on my shirt. I tried to pick it off but it crawled into my hand and stabbed my skin with its sharp legs. I screamed like a little girl because I had a centipede on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 354

You deserved it 336

By #201 - 05/02/2009 13:23 - United States

Today, I was eating ice cream and I noticed some on my jeans so I wiped it off with my finger and licked it. It was bird shit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 472

You deserved it 16 556

By Anonymous - 09/07/2009 05:15 - United States

Today, after buying dinner from the supermarket, I had the change in my hand, and my wallet. In the parking lot, a quarter fell out of my hand, and right next to the street drain. As I went to pick it up, my wallet fell down the drain. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 355

You deserved it 11 275

By FattyMcFatterson - 24/06/2009 02:37 - United States

Today, in the shower, a dime fell on my foot. The only place it could have come from? One of my fat rolls. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 805

You deserved it 82 481

By mmckie - 11/06/2019 22:00

Today, I went into a restaurant with my family. I slipped off my chair, pulling the tablecloth with all the food and drinks on it with me onto the floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 717

You deserved it 442

tennisrapper1 14

Monday 23 July 2012 19:02

The heads on the coins are watching you... So were the people in the restaurant. :P

borkchop1992 15

Monday 23 July 2012 19:03

It was stealthy pedo bear getting into your pants.

Comments

Kingbreezy04 10

Monday 23 July 2012 19:54

Haha I thought you were gonna say it was a turd. I'm glad I kept reading.

bubo_fml 10

Monday 23 July 2012 20:18

Add a pole to that dance & watch your quarters turn into $$!!

s0ulslack 20

Monday 23 July 2012 20:18

Nothing like looking like a lunatic in public

perdix 29

Monday 23 July 2012 20:20

Why are your quarters cold and wet? By any chance, is your restaurant popular with strippers after they get off. . . work, that is?

GracesDelirium 9

Monday 23 July 2012 21:21

That's an unfortunate thought...no wonder FML ***** up my dreams...

RedPillSucks 31

Monday 23 July 2012 21:30

If that were the case, she (he?!) would have described how customers stuff dollar bills down her pants in appreciation for the dance/show. Unless, she works at the same place Enslaved was eating at.