Transportation: Today, while driving home from work an old homeless man stepped...

By Anonymous - 08/10/2009 21:26 - United Kingdom

Today, while driving home from work an old homeless man stepped out on front of my car. As I slammed on the brakes the man threw a bag of poo at my windscreen and shouted "Praise The Lord!" before carrying on as if nothing had happened. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 693

You deserved it 3 448

Winter: Snow and Funny News
Snuggle up and laugh with our winter stories, where snow isn't the only thing sliding around! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By carson28 - 17/12/2010 02:23 - United States

Today, I saw a homeless man on the corner, I thought I would be generous and give him some cash. I rolled down my window and waved my hand for him to come over. As he was walking over, he was struck by another car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 225

You deserved it 6 352

You OK dude?

By Anonymous - 28/03/2024 00:00 - United States

Today, I walked out to the parking lot and caught a homeless man laying a fat steamer on the hood of my car. FML

I agree, your life sucks 520

You deserved it 71

By Anonymous - 18/02/2012 06:22 - United States

Today, a hobo threw up on my car while at a red light. He then asked me for money. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 058

You deserved it 2 457

By WamBamSam - 21/11/2012 09:54 - United Kingdom - Kidderminster

Today, whilst at a red light in my car, a homeless man with a spray bottle and a dirty rag came over to clean my windows. He started with the driver's window, which was wide open, and whatever was in his spray bottle smelled suspiciously like urine. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 096

You deserved it 2 356

By Jessy - 14/10/2011 11:22 - United Kingdom

Today, I was driving home when I saw my boyfriend chundering on the side of the road, into an old lady's shopping basket. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 188

You deserved it 2 781

By Anonymous - 21/06/2013 09:04 - Australia - Adelaide

Today, after cricket training, the homeless man that lives in the drain next to the nets threw a beer bottle full of piss at me for rejecting him for a date last week. I ducked; it sailed through my car’s open window and smashed all over the seats. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 311

You deserved it 4 876

By jackpot - 09/05/2011 01:53 - Venezuela

Today, I was in a parking lot looking for a spot, and after driving around for a long while I finally found one. A homeless man was taking a shit on it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 456

You deserved it 3 020

By Jehovah God - 07/03/2014 18:51 - United States - Richmond

Today, while I was waiting at a red light, a drunk guy limped in front of my car, unzipped, and started pissing on my windshield. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 379

You deserved it 3 614

By ugh - 14/06/2011 17:56 - United States

Today, I woke up to a homeless man relentlessly shitting on my porch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 698

You deserved it 3 927

Bashed

By Anonymous - 25/08/2019 14:00 - United States

Today, I was walking down the street, wearing nothing offensive, minding my own business, when a car drove past and threw something that hit me really hard in the back of my head. It was a Bible. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 809

You deserved it 143

crumsnatcha 4

Friday 9 October 2009 2:00

At least you weren't riding a motorcycle.

MoonyIce 0

Friday 9 October 2009 1:55

Aaaand that. That there is one of the funniest things I've read all damn day. Thank you.

Comments

leenheartlovex3 0

Saturday 10 October 2009 14:18

ROFL gotta love homeless people.

Rehd 0

Sunday 11 October 2009 2:30

that is so awesome!!!!!!!!!!

punky_fool 0

Sunday 11 October 2009 16:28

"praise the lord"? sounds so fake. boring story to.

andyroxs 2

Monday 12 October 2009 12:57

Well, at least you know what to do when the shit hits the ...wait nevermind.

Sterlobrooother 0

Tuesday 13 October 2009 5:22

That is so funny lolyou shoulda rammed him with your car

BravoUser 0

Monday 19 October 2009 5:48

Very shitty moment. Thank god he didn't throw it through the window.

confizzled 0

Saturday 24 October 2009 7:04

That hobo is officially declared Mr.McAwesome for his random act of throwing shit at someone's car. Also TY O.P for sharing this hilarious story :D

sillyzombiekid 0

Tuesday 27 October 2009 10:31

..LOL FYL

Aviva1313 0

Thursday 29 October 2009 9:00

what's a windscreen? haha

pasta_pot_17 0

Sunday 22 November 2009 0:35

Haahaha... That made me CHUCKLE!!! However, I do feel your immense pain, and your probable confusion.

Keywords

Awkward Lonely Love Party Transportation Cars ADHD Work Mental health Ironic Vacation Accident Miscellaneous Grandparents Kids Annoying Covid Health Cute Shopping Coworkers Dogs Animals Videos Photography Art Sex Intimacy Exhausted Money

The Top

Today, I finally met my dream woman: a smokin’ hot green-eyed petite redhead. Or so I thought. I met her online and “she” turned out to be a 22 year-old guy trolling me. The worst part is that I separated from my wife for this girl. She won’t take me back no matter how much I beg and plead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 127

You deserved it 4 081

Today, I had sex with someone new for the first time after my 10 year relationship ended. The person was a friend who had been making serious sexual references toward me on and off over the year I've known him. I don't know if I'm more embarrassed that he couldn't keep it up, or that I came from anticipation anyways. FML

I agree, your life sucks 985

You deserved it 303

The Top

Today, my boyfriend told me that if I had a penis, our relationship would be better. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 193

You deserved it 6 997

Today, my dad refused to sign a student finance form to allow me to study my dream subject at university because he doesn't want the government knowing his business. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 684

You deserved it 415

Today, my coworker came over to my desk and told me that I should protect my Twitter updates, because I had unknowingly made them public. My tweets include drinking stories, all the men I've hooked up with, various cuss words, sexual innuendos, and how much I hate my coworkers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 935

You deserved it 83 429

Today, I walked into Old Navy to buy myself a pair of jingle jammies. Save yourself the embarrassment: don't shake the jammies in the middle of the store to hear the jingling, because these jammies do not jingle. You'll just look like an idiot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 123

You deserved it 34 714

Today, I used the “Find My…” app to locate a missing AirPods. Good news: I found them. Bad news: they are inside my dog’s belly. Next stop: Emergency vet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 778

You deserved it 169

Today, I walked to an interview on my college campus. I got there early. The place was empty. I assumed I wrote the date wrong. Several hours later, a friend who also was interviewed asked me how my interview went. The date, time and location were all right. I don't know how I got lost. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 034

You deserved it 3 751

Same thing different taste

You OK dude?

Bashed

Top comments

Comments