Transportation: Today, while driving my grandma home from a family dinner, I...

By fuckingjesusgran - 07/05/2013 22:13 - Bosnia and Herzegovina - Sarajevo

Today, while driving my grandma home from a family dinner, I had to pull into a gas station, because my tank was almost empty. She became convinced that someone would kidnap her while I went to pay, and eventually threatened to blow us up by tossing her lighter at the gas pumps. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 193

You deserved it 3 563

Winter: Snow and Funny News
Snuggle up and laugh with our winter stories, where snow isn't the only thing sliding around! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

That's on you

By eldar90 - 25/02/2012 21:38 - Israel

Today, while waiting for my grandmother at the train station, a girl walked out and climbed into my car. When I cleared my throat to tell her of her mistake, she screamed and ran out as if I was a criminal trying to abduct her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 133

You deserved it 2 397

By arw - 25/07/2012 06:10 - United States

Today, I was with my grandma in my new car. She suddenly says, "I've got to pee bad." Without giving me enough time to find a gas station, she blurts out, "Never mind, I just did." FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 896

You deserved it 2 000

By Anonymous - 15/03/2016 05:55

Today, I had to drive down to my parents' house. On they way down, I needed to fill up on gas but unfortunately I'd forgotten my wallet at home with all of my cash and credit cards. I then had to call triple A and explain to them in all seriousness how I ran out of gas at the gas station. FML

I agree, your life sucks 17 194

You deserved it 3 320

By sorrygranny - 21/01/2013 16:11 - United States

Today, I was at the gas station with my grandma. After I slid her card and began to pump, I convinced her that it was a lot easier and more convenient to pay at the pump with your credit card instead of paying inside. She yelled as I realized I went $20 over what she had to spend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 095

You deserved it 41 408

By GodMemory_AbsentMind - 21/03/2017 18:00

Today, when paying for gas, I realized I'd forgotten my wallet back home. After a moment of panic, I managed to remember my card number. I paid, blowing the cute cashier's mind, and drove away, before my car started sputtering and slowed to a crawl. I'd used the wrong fuel. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 567

You deserved it 5 087

Book him, Danno

By Joey - 11/07/2021 11:01 - United States

Today, I was driving to a gas station because I'd noticed I was almost on empty. Literally a block away from the gas station, my car broke down in the middle of an intersection, and I had to push my car to the side of the road, only to be questioned by police for "suspicious behavior." FML

I agree, your life sucks 876

You deserved it 205

By casey - 25/03/2009 00:11 - United States

Today, I was sitting at home when I remembered that I desperately needed gas for my car. On my way there, I prayed that my car would make it the whole way, and was thankful when I pulled up to the pump, because I knew my car wouldn't go any further. Then I realized I left my wallet at my house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 894

You deserved it 26 457

By bummer - 25/11/2009 00:44 - United States

Today, I went to drive my mom's car for a change. It wouldn't start, so I open the hood. Someone had stolen the battery. I go to start my own car so I can drive to the police station to report the theft, and discover someone siphoned off my gas. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 724

You deserved it 2 182

By Boltz719 - 23/08/2009 05:10 - United States

Today, I was at my grandfather's house and my car was low on gas. He said I could put some of his gas in my car. He accidentally gave me the wrong tank to pump it out of, and I put fuel in my car that he uses for his small plane. It never ran better until the engine exploded. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 565

You deserved it 3 876

By AbsentMindedGal - 21/12/2013 09:07 - United States

Today, I stopped at the gas station to fill up my tank and get some snacks. I paid the cashier, then got back into my car, totally forgetting to pump the $50 worth of fuel I'd just prepaid for. Too bad I didn't realize until my car came to a sputtering stop about a mile down the road. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 802

You deserved it 22 646

Crazafon 19

Wednesday 8 May 2013 5:09

Its time to put Grandma in a home...

dectivebobby 6

Wednesday 8 May 2013 5:10

Hi I'm Grandma and this is Jackass

Comments

theycallmekitty 13

Wednesday 8 May 2013 5:14

You should have just brought her in to pay with you. That is if she was able.

cjlikeschairs 5

Wednesday 8 May 2013 5:14

Damn old people.

PenguinBitch 43

Wednesday 8 May 2013 6:23

14- Where is your shower head? Or the light reflecting from the mirror? First mirror pic I've seen lately without any of those characteristics. You're rare son.

MrSarcasmic 10

Wednesday 8 May 2013 5:16

R.E.D. retired and extremely dangerous: grandma is here to blow you away.

delaneyluke 5

Wednesday 8 May 2013 5:16

Holy psycho gran Batman

kevinhenning 4

Wednesday 8 May 2013 5:19

It's never to late for a retirement home

hipsterhunter 9

Wednesday 8 May 2013 11:21

Unless you're dead. Then it's too late.

HortonThelephant 15

Wednesday 8 May 2013 5:20

In Soviet Russia, grandma troll you!! No, wait a sec. That seems yo be just about everywhere these days..

perdix 29

Wednesday 8 May 2013 5:55

#19, no. There may come a day where that one perfect story sets up a Soviet Russia joke that is actually funny. Today is not that day.

183933 6

Wednesday 8 May 2013 5:34

Let me see if I can understand grandmas logic. She's afraid someone will kidnap (and I'm guessing kill) her, so to prevent that from happening grandmas alternative is to blow herself up! Nope, I can't say that I understand her logic in this one.

Wizzlbang 10

Wednesday 8 May 2013 8:46

aren't you the analytical one.

Kozmotis 8

Wednesday 8 May 2013 5:43

Gotta do what you gotta do.

Kozmotis 8

Wednesday 8 May 2013 5:45

"Grandma, eat a Snickers." "Why" "Because you turn into a psychopath when you're hungry."

perdix 29

Wednesday 8 May 2013 5:46

Tell her that is physically impossible and then run like hell. (It's actually physically unlikely, but Granny's charred carcass will never be able to tell anyone how you misled her, heh-heh-heh.)