Intimacy: Today, while in bed with my fiancée, I asked her to take off...

By DieTrying - 02/02/2012 09:31 - United States

Today, while in bed with my fiancée, I asked her to take off her pants so we could get it on. She said, "No, I don't feel like squeezing into them again." I was cockblocked by a pair of jeans. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 269

You deserved it 5 477

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Same thing different taste

By sad-sexed - 06/09/2010 12:50 - Australia

Today, I was lying on my bed with my boyfriend. I didn't really want to have sex so I told him I would if he really wanted too, but I wouldn't enjoy it. He then started to undo my pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 100

You deserved it 55 543

By unwantedlove - 25/02/2011 18:36 - France

Today, my fiancé and I were cuddling on the couch watching TV when we started kissing. As I crawled onto his lap and started to unzip his pants, he said, "You're blocking the TV." FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 165

You deserved it 6 916

Unexpected

By Matt988 - 22/03/2021 23:00 - India

Today, I was making out with my girlfriend when I felt her slip her hand into my pants. She then gave me a wedgie. FML

I agree, your life sucks 897

You deserved it 283

Romantic

By robinhoood - 12/07/2009 05:38 - United States

Today, my girlfriend, who never initiates sex, pulled me into my room and onto my bed with kisses and other seductive behavior. As I'm thinking about how awesome it is that's she's doing this for once, she reaches down, grabs my underwear, and gives me the worst wedgie I've ever received. FML

I agree, your life sucks 77 135

You deserved it 13 557

Protip

By Herman - 13/02/2023 06:00 - United States - Bedford

Today, I went to my room to find my girlfriend on the floor, butt up, with her pants down. I elatedly took the invitation and dropped my pants too, only for her to tell me, "Not so fast champ, I'm trying to force some farts out." FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 102

You deserved it 479

Time is money

By asdfasdf - 24/01/2009 15:14 - Canada

Today, my girlfriend said she didn't want to have sex because it takes too long. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 234

You deserved it 5 974

Denied

By Anonymous - 02/02/2025 13:00 - United States

Today, I woke up with a raging hard on. My wife, who was also awake, felt it when I pressed against her. She said, "No thank you," got up, and walked away. FML

I agree, your life sucks 343

You deserved it 142

By Anonymous - 30/04/2013 18:24 - United States - Pompton Plains

Today, I got home from work and found my girlfriend waiting for me in some skimpy lingerie. She ended up pushing me onto the bed, and as I lay there, expecting to be pleasured, she pulled out a pair of adult-sized footsie pajamas and dressed me in them. FML

I agree, your life sucks 64 973

You deserved it 8 446

Small guy

By no luck chuck - 09/10/2021 02:00 - United States

Today, I knew I was a small guy and finally about to get laid for the first time in years. Everything was going great, until she got my pants off. She stared at it, stared at me, stared back at it and said, "Yeah, that’s not gonna happen." Got dressed and left. Sadly this has happened many times. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 926

You deserved it 228

By TJ - 06/04/2012 11:10 - United Kingdom - Redhill

Today, my girlfriend and I were in bed. She slipped her hand under the duvet, and I got all excited thinking she was going to give me a hand job. She was actually pulling out her wedgie. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 243

You deserved it 10 427

justfienne 12

Thursday 2 February 2012 16:20

Cut a hole in the crotch, then she'll never have to take them off.

DocBastard 38

Thursday 2 February 2012 16:26

I will NEVER understand women and fashion. Squeezing yourselves into jeans just to make your ass look good, contorting your feet into high heels just to make your legs look good, shoving yourselves into push-up bras just to make your boobs look good... Actually, forget what I just said. Keep doing all those things, please. You know, for fashion.

Comments

Driveshaft 5

Thursday 2 February 2012 22:20

Did she have jeans on her head as well? Simple solutions!!!

neffkid 0

Thursday 2 February 2012 23:28

and u coulndt just of unzippered her zipper?!

saksxalmo 20

Thursday 2 February 2012 23:46

Where do you think vaginas are...?

TexasRandi 1

Friday 3 February 2012 0:33

U deserve it for telling her you wanted to "get it in" what happened to romance or even being a big boy & saying wanna f#?k??

thunter2000 2

Friday 3 February 2012 1:43

Time to get a new fiancée. If its like that already its just going to get worse!

omarzrgz 3

Friday 3 February 2012 1:51

You don't say O.O

TKello 6

Friday 3 February 2012 2:14

Should've reminded her that having sex burns calories, thus helps to make pants loose.

SoultheWolf 19

Friday 3 February 2012 2:21

Tell her to buy bigger pants if she doesn't want to have to squeeze into them... Or just stop eating all the junk food.

CRC_101 31

Friday 3 February 2012 2:44

Give her money to go shopping "for a more comfortable pair of jeans," in exchange for sexy time. Does she take offense to the idea of prostitution? Either way, she should get a pair she enjoys more or learn to love good ol' pjs!