start kicking some ass.

how could you put something valuable left at the table unattended

that stinks

This. I'd hate to say anyone deserves to have their things stolen because it feels awful but why would you (or your friend) leave your stuff lying around unattended? You couldn't possibly know and trust everyone at the wedding.

The logic of this drunk guy bothers me. Why steal someones keys and then take a cab home?

Y'all should have known better than to trust your things around random drunk guys... even at a wedding.

Speak with the Bride and groom. Find out who the guy was, they will likely know where he is staying and get them (as they likely know him more than you would) to call that asshole and make him come back to give back the keys. I hate it when drunk people do things like this thinking it will be funny and then in their drunken state forget to either tell you or give them back. It's like a punchline without a joke.

this isn't an fml this is a fyfl. but that does suck.

wow

and especially a drunk guy cuz if you were signing in he would have to run out the door you just came in from and I imagine henwiuldnt be hard to stop