Health: Today, while watching home videos with my family, I saw a clip...

By Nasty - 25/04/2016 16:59 - United States - Tallahassee

Today, while watching home videos with my family, I saw a clip of me as an infant attempting to breast feed from my father while he laughed uncontrollably. Now, my son keeps sneaking his baby brother's head under my shirt while I'm asleep. The last time he actually began to suckle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 983

You deserved it 1 371

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Same thing different taste

By Indianagirl94 - 29/10/2012 22:22 - United States

Today, I was woken up by my husband attempting to breastfeed off my lactating nipples. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 706

You deserved it 3 385

Baby fever

By SkeetinKeaton - 06/05/2013 06:29 - United States

Today, I woke up to the sound of my newborn screaming. I frantically hopped out of bed and stumbled into the nursery where I was met by the priceless sight of my five-year-old daughter attempting to breastfeed her understandably frustrated little brother. FML

I agree, your life sucks 71 400

You deserved it 6 565

Bittie

By Anonymous - 18/09/2020 14:02 - Hungary - Sopron

Today, it was my brother's wedding so my mother-in-law was taking care of my 8-month-old son. When I came back to our room to check how things were going, I saw her "breastfeeding" my child. She said it was the only way to calm him down because he didn't have a pacifier. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 812

You deserved it 212

By Anonymous - 30/03/2011 18:26 - Canada

Today, I woke up to what I thought was my 9 month old son breastfeeding. It was my boyfriend. According to him, he wanted to experience what his mother never gave him as a kid. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 578

You deserved it 8 314

By possiblyoverweight - 08/11/2011 14:01 - United Kingdom

Today, my baby son latched onto my nipple for a feed, after a month of having to be bottle fed because he wouldn't latch. This would be fantastic, if it weren't for the fact that I'm his father, not his mother. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 899

You deserved it 4 392

By Mamallama - 19/08/2018 13:00

Today, I leaned down to pick up my infant son from his highchair. He reached up and grabbed the first thing available to him: my nipple. I got purple-nurpled by my baby. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 345

You deserved it 401

By Milk Dispenser - 12/03/2019 05:00 - United States - Herriman

Today, breastfeeding my infant has become so automatic that when my dog nuzzled up against me while I was sleeping, I lifted up my shirt and unhooked my nursing bra. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 989

You deserved it 383

By ameliaruth09 - 22/01/2015 22:36 - United States - Milford

Today, while breast feeding my 7 month-old before his nap, I hummed his favorite song as I rocked. He pulled away, stared at me, and cried til I shut up. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 905

You deserved it 5 130

By I don't know, son - 16/11/2013 01:53 - Canada - Toronto

Today, I was lying beside my 5-year-old son to help him get to sleep. He turned his head and asked, "Daddy, why do you suck so much?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 846

You deserved it 4 781

By Scott - 15/09/2011 07:34 - United States

Today, I caught my pregnant wife trying to suck milk from her breasts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 292

You deserved it 6 419

bethanyhopkins 49

Tuesday 26 April 2016 8:51

... How old is your son?

nesssy 16

Tuesday 26 April 2016 8:50

Well, the apple doesn't fall far from the tree I guess.

Comments

nesssy 16

Tuesday 26 April 2016 8:50

Well, the apple doesn't fall far from the tree I guess.

bethanyhopkins 49

Tuesday 26 April 2016 8:51

... How old is your son?

whysobeachy 37

Tuesday 26 April 2016 18:59

I'm hoping he's in his early twenties, or something.

riddhi 16

Tuesday 26 April 2016 8:57

time to make your family videos..

compensator 7

Tuesday 26 April 2016 9:17

New family tradition?

Magnoxidans 19

Tuesday 26 April 2016 9:32

What a SUCKY situation.

Kidd_Ant 18

Tuesday 26 April 2016 12:55

Nope nope nope, tried too hard.

Kaylyn15 23

Tuesday 26 April 2016 19:00

Go to your room and think about what you did.

ssnow_fml 20

Tuesday 26 April 2016 10:09

This is probably the weirdest FML I have ever read.

Delta_0DST 12

Tuesday 26 April 2016 16:24

No arguments from me on that. Definitely one of the weirdest FMLs out there currently

Mynamewontfi 40

Tuesday 26 April 2016 10:23

Sharing is caring. Now you know how it feels for his mother.

Frau_Blucher 14

Tuesday 26 April 2016 10:45

Hey I did that when I was an infant too, as told by my parents lol (except I used to cry when my father's chest hair got in the way)

sturschaedel 27

Tuesday 26 April 2016 11:28

I tried to do that with my hubby when our kids were little, but they wouldn't try to drink. I guess he didn't smell like milk enough.

The_Potato_Lord 15

Tuesday 26 April 2016 14:10

That must've sucked. I'll leave.

rldostie 19

Tuesday 26 April 2016 14:33

Know you know how it feels to breastfeed! Sort of.

Keywords

Embarrassing Miscellaneous Awkward Sleep Work Love Dating Am I overreacting? Annoying Parents Health Mental health Furniture Kids Friends Gross Fight Public freakouts Drugs Neighbours Cops Medication Relatable Dogs Animals Teenagers Ironic Video games Gamers Zoom

The Top

Today, I woke up with the flu that causes me to throw up violently until I dry heave and can't breathe. I told my mom I would rather have the runs, and not even a minute later, I got them. So now if I move too fast, I throw up, and if I don't move fast enough, I shit myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 666

You deserved it 3 982

Today, I went out with this girl I really liked and she came back to my place. Things were heating up and we ended up having sex. I was on top and really into it but in the middle of it she held up her wrist and said, "Huh, look at the time, I gotta get home." She wasn't wearing a watch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 92 747

You deserved it 17 915

The Top

Today, the CEO of my company leaned over and said, "Hey, I've been meaning to thank you…" I thought he was going to thank me for all of my hard work, but he continued, "…for wearing that shirt today. I can totally see your boobs." FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 234

You deserved it 7 067

Today, my mom laughed about hearing me singing in the shower and told our whole family. I wasn't singing, though. I was masturbating. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 046

You deserved it 2 955

Today, it's currently 10:30am on a Thursday and my husband is already so drunk from his several “hair of the dogs” to cure his hangover from last night that he has passed out on the toilet. I had to lie to his boss that he has food poisoning just so he wouldn’t sack him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 950

You deserved it 177

Today, I got a speeding ticket while taking my drivers license test. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 445

You deserved it 38 387

Today, I spent my first night with my girlfriend. After waiting for weeks, a few seconds were enough to make a fool of myself when I tried to remove her panties twice. It was a tan line. FML

I agree, your life sucks 594

You deserved it 160

Today, I made my mom breakfast in bed for her birthday. She was naked when I went to give it to her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 637

You deserved it 6 500

Same thing different taste

Baby fever

Bittie

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