Intimacy: Today, without thinking, I casually advised my mum that the best... - FML

By Anonymous - 25/10/2016 08:31

Today, without thinking, I casually advised my mum that the best way to get the piping nozzle clean is to 'fingerfuck' it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 925

You deserved it 4 869

Winter: Snow and Funny News
Snuggle up and laugh with our winter stories, where snow isn't the only thing sliding around! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By isucksomuch - 31/07/2011 06:18 - Canada

Today, I found out my mother cleans the dishes with bathroom cleaning chemicals. She doesn't see anything wrong with this. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 056

You deserved it 2 686

Mom won this one

By duuuuude - 17/04/2009 03:08 - United States

Today, I was home alone while my mom went out to dinner. I decided to hop in the shower, and I noticed my mom left her douche in there. After, I texted her telling her what I found and that it was gross. Her response? "It's not gross. It came from my vagina, like you and your sister." FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 994

You deserved it 23 324

By Anonymous - 20/09/2010 09:37 - Australia

Today, I was emptying the cutlery section of the dishwasher when I reached down and accidentally got the tip of a steak knife wedged half-way under my fingernail. My mum yelled at me for getting blood on the clean dishes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 481

You deserved it 3 857

The student becomes the master

By Anonymous - 21/08/2021 20:01

Today, I had my first day being my mum’s carer. She did the biggest shit I’ve ever seen, and when the toilet wouldn’t flush it, I had put a gloved hand down the loo and break it up with my fingers. Start things how you mean to go on, I guess. FML

I agree, your life sucks 854

You deserved it 92

Nice mental image

By Maggie - 17/03/2020 17:00

Today, I had no choice but to unclog a toilet with my bare hands. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 638

You deserved it 341

By Anonymous - 02/01/2015 16:20 - Canada - Milton

Today, I woke up at 4am needing a piss, only to walk in on my fuckstick brother combing his pubes with our mom's toothbrush. FML

I agree, your life sucks 35 170

You deserved it 2 675

By Anonymous - 11/09/2011 19:16 - United Kingdom

Today, I had to clean up after the kid that discovered he could finger paint with his poo. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 244

You deserved it 3 186

By Prae - 01/10/2012 05:47 - United States - Dallas

Today, I washed the dishes for my mom while she was out, as they seemed to be piling up. I accidentally sliced my hand with a knife in the process. After a trip to the hospital, it was revealed she'd been leaving those dishes there "to teach dad a lesson." FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 683

You deserved it 2 118

By seaweedlady - 21/06/2011 14:49 - United States

Today, my mother tried to have a conversation with me. While she was taking a piss. With the bathroom door wide open. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 985

You deserved it 4 875

By Anonymous - 25/09/2010 14:45 - Malaysia

Today, I was trying to apply some toothpaste on my pimple to help dry it out. My mum came from behind and hugged me, making me accidentally apply minty toothpaste into my right eye instead. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 867

You deserved it 4 696

Next

Top comments

Tripartita 44

Tuesday 25 October 2016 17:01

Then, before you could stop yourself, you told her that nipple clamps can help to hold problematic piping in place. Next you explained that ball gags make great replacement float balls, and then all hell broke loose as you found yourself reading your dissertation on the parallels between BDSM and proper house care.

coolmike699 26

Tuesday 25 October 2016 19:19

FingerFYL

Comments

Wonthebread 20

Wednesday 26 October 2016 22:46

She's never going to look at you the same way

jessicasoho 13

Thursday 27 October 2016 23:08

I prefer the term, "fingerblast"

UrOnMyNerves1345 4

Monday 31 October 2016 15:55

"fingerfuck" 00

Keywords

Awkward Love My ex AITA Jealousy Friends Poopoo peepee Health Embarrassing Sports Proposal Annoying Snow Cold weather Cheating Work Money Relatable Kids Parenting DIY Accident Parents Medication ADHD Weather Miscellaneous Relationship advice Am I overreacting? Weird

The Top

Today, while driving home, I looked in the rear-view mirror and saw that my three-year-old daughter had managed to get out of her seat and had crawled to the back window. I pulled over and strapped her in again. Five minutes later she was back at the window. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 219

You deserved it 5 961

Here's another FML video from our friends at 10secondtraumas.com. Enjoy! Today, my boyfriend and I were cuddling on his couch when suddenly I tried to get up. Before I could stand, he grabs onto me and says, "I'm a koala and you're my eucalyptus tre...

I agree, your life sucks 41

You deserved it 39

The Top

Today, our kids left for the weekend so that my wife and I could have some much-needed alone time. We've been fighting a lot recently and really need some time to have fun together. Now it turns out that she doesn't want to be around me because of the fighting. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 082

You deserved it 5 795

Today, I was lying in bed with my girlfriend, when she reached over and twisted my nipples to the point of tears. I'm still not sure what in the name of Dawkins I did to deserve that. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 487

You deserved it 13 988

Today, my dad borrowed my new iPad to amuse him while he was in the shower without my knowledge. The iPad is now completely ruined, and my dad is refusing to buy me a new one. He says, "How was I to know that it wasn't waterproof?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 933

You deserved it 3 867

Today, my dad sent me back and forth repeatedly to the auto parts store for a replacement headlight bulb. He kept insisting that what I brought back was the wrong bulb. I had to drag him there to show I was getting the right one by asking the clerk. He's wrong, but is mad at me for embarrassing him in front of the staff. FML

I agree, your life sucks 501

You deserved it 85

Today, I realized that the only male that has ever been in bed with me has been my cat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 162

You deserved it 6 936

Today, I was at a fraternity party, and one of the hosts said over the loudspeaker "turn to the person next to you and picture them naked, then drink a beer if the mental image disturbs you". I turned, only to be face-to-face with my ex-boyfriend. He drank two beers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 344

You deserved it 5 629