Intimacy: Turn off - FML

Turn off

By whatdoesitmatter - 01/10/2013 10:47 - India - Erayu

Spicy

Today, my sex-crazed ex wrote me a letter so bad, it haunts me that I let a guy with such terrible grammar skills touch my boobs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 179

You deserved it 12 010

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 14/12/2010 05:01 - United States

Spicy

Today, I got a message from the girl I like. She told me to never speak to her again and not even look at her any more. Apparently the letter I wrote to her was perverted, vile and nasty. I never wrote her a letter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 092

You deserved it 2 805

By Notsurewhattofeelaboutthis - 07/08/2015 02:55 - Australia - Ashfield

Spicy

Today, I discovered that my ex-girlfriend writes erotic fiction describing all of my moves in intimate detail. The whole internet gets to critique my entire sexual repertoire. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 983

You deserved it 3 626

By KiDCuSHi - 20/08/2011 04:58 - Canada

Spicy

Today, my girlfriend sexted me for the first time in months. Halfway through reading it I was getting kind of hot. Then I found a spelling mistake and all I could think to do was correct her. She now won't talk to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 076

You deserved it 76 627

Hilariously sexy

By Laceylace - 22/03/2009 20:40 - United States

Spicy

Today, I wrote my boyfriend a sexy letter designed to arouse him. I described what I wanted us to do to each other in the most erotic way. Later, he came up to me and hugged me, saying it was the funniest thing he ever read and he's glad he's in love with a girl with such a great sense of humor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 69 243

You deserved it 13 231

Never forget

By Hello - 20/06/2011 05:21 - United States

Today, I received the only love letter I've ever gotten. Too bad it's from the guy who's been stalking me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 441

You deserved it 3 986

By tutusaurus - 28/08/2012 14:16 - United States - Salinas

Today, I wrote the girl I love a long, gushy letter to convince her to be with me instead of her abusive ex. Later on, I asked her what she thought. She said she can't read cursive. She chose the ex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 613

You deserved it 4 457

By DJ - 11/12/2011 01:01 - United States

Today, my creepy, stalker ex-girlfriend was given an anonymous love letter. She's convinced it's from me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 209

You deserved it 2 860

Depends on the content of the message…

By Anonymous - 08/06/2024 12:00 - United States - Sandy

Spicy

Today, I was sexting my ex in a bad choice whirlwind, but I accidentally sent it to the guy I've just met. I immediately knew the message wasn’t meant for him, and that it ruined our chances of dating. FML

I agree, your life sucks 81

You deserved it 703

You got mail

By Awkwardly_dumped - 21/08/2018 14:30

Today, I was making out with my boyfriend. When we took a break and went downstairs, he checked the mail. He had received a letter from his ex-girlfriend, which he opened in front of me. He then began sobbing on my shoulder and broke up with me. He still had to drive me home. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 379

You deserved it 195

By schooyou101 - 04/12/2012 00:53 - United States - Prairie Village

Spicy

Today, my crazy psychopath of a neighbor sent me an email with the subject, "So, about your sex life." I've been sitting here for 20 minutes staring at it because I'm too scared to open it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 873

You deserved it 3 967

Next

Top comments

killuhand 12

Tuesday 1 October 2013 19:03

"I want boob touch u very best"

raininginseattle 9

Tuesday 1 October 2013 19:00

Did he write you the letter in crayons and draw pretty pictures?

Comments

tonjean1 5

Wednesday 2 October 2013 20:52

I can't believe FML posted this. Absolutely LAME! Who cares if your ex has bad grammar, and touched your boob? Why the hell would you read his note? Moreover, why is it important that he was sex-crazed? Ugh! I'm even questioning myself on posting this comment, it just has to be done...

LissaMccracken 23

Thursday 3 October 2013 0:19

Oh. He wrote you a letter so bad. Okay.

jdog408 8

Saturday 5 October 2013 18:32

*wrote me a letter so poorly

KittyBiersack 1

Saturday 5 October 2013 21:34

I've been in the same situation.

831curmudgeon 7

Tuesday 8 October 2013 23:20

A pretty good rule of thumb (or perhaps rule of boob), is that when the guy is himself a boob, he should get nowhere near your boobs!

bdub31 11

Wednesday 9 October 2013 17:26

At least that's all he got to do.

JustNatalie 8

Tuesday 15 October 2013 22:38

I'm a grammar nazi. That would kill me

czeptoks 8

Thursday 17 October 2013 13:45

check list item no. 1: his grammar should be good. sincerely grammar nazi

sarii 7

Friday 25 October 2013 10:14

I can relate!

shinikageWolf 15

Saturday 26 October 2013 19:27

Hey Tarzan had pretty bad grammar, yet his good looks got him a pretty lady.

2
3
4
5
6

Keywords

Cheating Love Work Relatable Money Jealousy My ex Health Accident Medication ADHD Weather Snow Miscellaneous Embarrassing Awkward Relationship advice Am I overreacting? Weird AITA Dating Sleep Annoying Parents Mental health Furniture Kids Friends Gross Fight

The Top

Today, I have a skin disease that causes my arms and legs to have small, but noticeable, red bumps on them. Trying to stay confident, I put on a swimsuit and went to the pool, only to be bumped into by a cute guy, who then asked why my arms were so "bumpy and disgusting." FML

I agree, your life sucks 920

You deserved it 109

Today, at work, I'm supervising one person. Recently there's been tension between her and a couple of other coworkers, one of which was her friend. I spent the day running around and trying to smooth things over, just to find out what started this was her walking in on her former friend talking about her behind her back. FML

I agree, your life sucks 303

You deserved it 96

The Top

Today, I found out that my wife has been getting rid of every single item of clothing I didn’t compliment her on. This has probably cost me thousands already. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 704

You deserved it 425

Today, I got a call from a police department saying that if I didn't move my car from a store's parking lot within the next 15 minutes, they were going to tow it and charge me for the fee. I was at work and the reason I parked it there is because it started smoking and almost caught fire. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 708

You deserved it 4 905

Today, I found out that my best friend kisses me while I sleep. We're both guys. FML

I agree, your life sucks 71 979

You deserved it 8 743

Today, the guy of my dreams told me he liked me and leaned in to kiss me. Just as our lips touched, I ripped a big ass fart. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 519

You deserved it 16 146

Today, my wife asked me what I wanted for my birthday, and I said sex. She told me to grow up and ask for something more realistic. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 943

You deserved it 376

Today, I found out that my girlfriend got drunk and cheated on me. After I tried to talk to her about it, she dumped me. Not because she didn't like me anymore or that she liked the other guy, but because she felt "too guilty" and "wouldn't be able to look me in the eyes anymore." FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 033

You deserved it 3 425