Porn and Work: Wanker

Wanker

By fired - 09/08/2013 22:17

Today, I was in the restroom at work, snickering at some funny stories on my phone while I took a dump. Little did I know that the asshole in the next stall would report me to our boss, claiming he'd heard weird noises, then looked over the divider and witnessed me jacking off to porn. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 247

You deserved it 7 486

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Same thing different taste

By Dhagiik - 24/02/2017 18:00 - United States - Oak Park

Today, I walked into the bathroom at work, and in the stall next to me I could hear someone pleasuring himself. I decided to let my boss know what was going on, but it turns out that it was my boss in the stall next to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 177

You deserved it 1 140

Way too public

By stewiesclone - 11/02/2010 09:09 - United States

Today, I was taking a dump in a public restroom. Minding my own business, I heard somebody go into an adjacent stall. It was dead silent and I don't think he knew I was in there. I thought I heard him scratching his arm or something. I was wrong. He was jacking off. I had to listen to it all. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 992

You deserved it 3 063

Not now, mate

By yuen - 16/06/2009 14:59 - Australia

Today, I went to take a shit and found my boss shaving in the toilet. While in the cubicle, he asked me about my work and the conversation lasted 15 minutes. I stayed in there even though I'd finished shitting after 5 minutes, during which 3 people heard my progress report while shitting next to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 610

You deserved it 4 741

By Sleeper_C3ll - 04/02/2009 23:04 - United States

Today, I heard a man pleasuring himself in the stall next to me during my post lunch deuce. I was washing my hands when my boss walked out of the stall. I can no longer look at him in the face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 54 117

You deserved it 2 877

By Anonymous - 21/08/2012 17:39 - United States - Charlotte

Today, I walked into the restroom at work, only to find my boss stroking and playing with himself. I have my annual performance assessment with him in an hour. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 633

You deserved it 2 338

By Anonymous - 26/09/2011 18:52 - United States

Today, at work while on the toilet, somebody came into the stall next to me and gave a loud play by play of every fart, plop, and grunt. He then asked loudly who I was and when I didn't answer put his head under the stall to look at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 062

You deserved it 3 580

Shut up!

By Anonymous - 03/03/2013 18:03 - Germany - Augsburg

Today, I was awkwardly taking a dump at work, when a coworker in another stall started talking shit to me about our boss. I grunted and agreed, hoping he'd shut up and leave me alone. That's when a third guy sarcastically chimed in with insults from a third stall. It was our boss. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 980

You deserved it 11 230

By ThoroughlyCreepedOut - 07/03/2010 00:22 - United States

Today, while in a public restroom, a man entered the stall next to me and began vigorously wanking. He finished quickly, but as he was leaving he peeped in at me through the crack in the stall door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 333

You deserved it 2 251

By teaspoonzz - 25/10/2017 15:00

Today, I walked into the ladies' bathroom to find my male boss taking a dump with the stall door wide open. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 631

You deserved it 286

By Anonymous - 02/10/2011 20:35 - United Kingdom

Today, at work, my boss went to the single-stall bathroom on our floor. The next thing I know, I'm on suspension pending review because some asshole left an upper-decker in the toilet. Since I'm the office prankster, all suspicion is now on me. I've been framed by my own colleagues. FML

I agree, your life sucks 22 920

You deserved it 14 874

iAlissa 34

Saturday 10 August 2013 2:56

What a shallow douchecanoe.

obnum 19

Saturday 10 August 2013 2:57

I'll never understand why some people feel the need to be asses.

Comments

Nurd4lyfe 7

Saturday 10 August 2013 3:31

Tell on his ass for watching you take a dump! And who snickers while watching **** anyway? Only a moron would make that mistake

QueenOrangeSoda 21

Saturday 10 August 2013 3:34

I don't see where in this FML it said the guy actually looked over the stall. It said the guy *REPORTED* that he heard weird noises from OP's stall and looked over to see him jacking off to ****. If he really did look over, he wouldn't have seen OP jacking off or looking at ****, would he?

michelleJ11 25

Saturday 10 August 2013 4:19

How're you suppose to see the person in the next stall when you're also in a bathroom stall? You either look under the stall, or over the stall. Looking over the stall is the only logical way he could've 'looked over' & seen OP. He didn't look at what OP was looking at, he just automatically assumed that it was ****. That's what I got out of the FML.

rocker_chick23 27

Sunday 21 September 2014 8:41

I doubt your IQ is higher than Einsteins. If it was, you would have comprehended the FML and not make a stupid comment.

chris4u2nv5 19

Saturday 10 August 2013 3:35

Gay bitches be crazy!!!

baconboy_42 8

Saturday 10 August 2013 3:51

What an odd day to I've in Estonia. Grandpas taking pics of their junk, then this!

failure_04 4

Saturday 10 August 2013 3:52

Damn sorry dude

tehdarkness 21

Saturday 10 August 2013 3:55

Why were you snickering out loud? It is strange to laugh whilst pooping.

worldclassrager 39

Saturday 10 August 2013 4:01

Have him check your phone Internet history for that day...just hope you didn't watch anything earlier...

browniey 11

Saturday 10 August 2013 4:09

If it was me, probably reading FML is on the top of my list lol. Sorry, OP your co-worker is an asshole and plus why would he look between the stalls... creepy much.

Poppipuff 14

Saturday 10 August 2013 4:11

Wait, you don't look over the stall when you hear 'fap fap fap' with breathing noises ?! I hope your boss didn't believe him, it doesn't make sense anyway.