Intimacy: We all do it. Don't we?

We all do it. Don't we?

By Anonymous - 30/08/2010 07:30 - United States

Today, I saw my girlfriend scratch her crotch and then sniff her fingers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 063

You deserved it 13 760

Winter: Snow and Funny News
Snuggle up and laugh with our winter stories, where snow isn't the only thing sliding around! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By jeesh - 31/01/2009 11:48 - United States

Today, my girlfriend caught me picking my nose and eating the booger. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 972

You deserved it 89 325

By davincourt - 29/04/2012 18:31 - United States - Apollo Beach

Today, I woke up to my girlfriend wiping a booger off her finger and onto my lip. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 282

You deserved it 3 004

By GroosedOut - 20/08/2009 12:32 - United States

Today, I saw my wife pick her nose and suck on her fingers. We're 38. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 607

You deserved it 5 407

Nailed it

By anon - 21/12/2013 14:13 - United States - Lehigh Acres

Today, my girlfriend and I were having sex. I guess she got bored because she started looking at her nails. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 128

You deserved it 12 912

By Anonymous - 08/07/2012 11:26 - Australia

Today, I witnessed my boyfriend sneeze in his hands, and then lick it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 114

You deserved it 3 501

AAaaaaaah!

By Anonymous - 23/02/2023 16:00 - New Zealand - Auckland

Today, I finally got to see my girlfriend's mouth open with pleasure… while she was scratching a bug bite. FML

I agree, your life sucks 400

You deserved it 730

By footfood - 27/06/2011 14:56 - Slovenia

Today, I witnessed my girlfriend eat the dead skin from the soles of her feet. FML

I agree, your life sucks 74 360

You deserved it 7 725

By bootyislife - 03/02/2015 04:36 - United States - Seattle

Today, my girlfriend thought it would be sexy to give me a naked massage. She straddled my back and started rubbing, then she sneezed and peed on me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 45 261

You deserved it 4 987

By Harry Dare - 02/09/2011 16:31 - United Kingdom

Today, just after waking up, I caught a glimpse of my girlfriend in the mirror. Not knowing I was awake, she sniffed at her armpits, started gagging, then quietly came back to bed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 993

You deserved it 4 322

Unexpected

By Matt988 - 22/03/2021 23:00 - India

Today, I was making out with my girlfriend when I felt her slip her hand into my pants. She then gave me a wedgie. FML

I agree, your life sucks 886

You deserved it 279

christa953 12

Monday 30 August 2010 16:03

and?? I've seen boys do that too. lol

nuts_in_your_fac 1

Monday 30 August 2010 16:04

That's hot. Scratch 'n sniff.

Comments

MRCC_fml 0

Thursday 2 September 2010 8:51

what's wrong with that. haven't you ever scratched your balls or ass then smelled it everybody does it don't deny you don't do it

dannyboytexas 0

Thursday 2 September 2010 17:29

Lol lol so funny

Marinov 0

Friday 3 September 2010 1:14

Lol time for new gf

salty123456 0

Friday 3 September 2010 2:22

I ALWAYS smell my fingers after scratching myself ( I'm a girl) and I don't think it's weird so don't dump her!

denisseDGAF 0

Friday 3 September 2010 7:11

pshh thats sexy. no im kidding but it aint that bad. at least it wasnther asshole

mopi_fml 0

Saturday 4 September 2010 6:53

you act like you dint scratch it crotch and sniff ur fingers

lovesteph3523 0

Sunday 5 September 2010 6:48

scratch and sniff!

XxGingerBbyxX 0

Sunday 5 September 2010 6:50

Haha that's funny I'd definately hit it

smexiSGF 0

Monday 6 September 2010 16:56

aha not normal =p

KingsBlade 0

Wednesday 8 September 2010 3:20

wow only 2 comments? lol well that wouldn't bother me.

Keywords

Love Friends Awkward Miscellaneous Cute Haircut Relatable You're fired Work Cars Parenting Kids Family DIY Cats Sex Intimacy Am I overreacting? Management Poopoo peepee Coworkers Frustration Capitalism Dogs Animals ADHD Transportation Dating Health Anxiety

The Top

Today, my neighbour from across the road phoned me at work telling me there was a fire engine outside my house and a lot of smoke. I drove home in a panic, smashing a rear light on a post and getting flashed by a speed camera. It wasn't my house. The firemen were putting out a bonfire next door. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 856

You deserved it 6 630

Today, it's day one of my suspension and probably being fired from my job. Why? I accidentally took a beer out my bag instead of a soda, then got distracted working to make sure everything got done. FML

I agree, your life sucks 98

You deserved it 511

The Top

Today, I ran over a chipmunk. On my bike. Its mangled carcass got caught in the spokes and decided to join me on my ride. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 962

You deserved it 12 633

Today, I went to a first aid training course. I had to lie on the floor and pretend I was unconscious. We were supposed to be doing the recovery position, but the guy I was working with decided to perform CPR instead and grope my boobs in the process. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 552

You deserved it 3 485

Today, my pregnancy test came back positive. My boyfriend is no fan of fatherhood, so it was with some hesitation that I called him and let him know I'm pregnant. He replied, "Like hell you are!" and hung up. He now refuses to answer any of my calls. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 921

You deserved it 10 865

Today, I decided to start jogging to keep fit. I was passed about ten times by the same car, carrying four bozos whose vocabulary consisted only of, "TITTIES!" and copious amounts of giggling. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 299

You deserved it 2 165

Today, I had a phone interview for a better position at work. I've been training my puppy recently not to bark. I put on dog-calming videos while she was in the kennel. During the interview, my neighbor's dog started barking and my dog immediately responded back. My boss ended the interview. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 025

You deserved it 181

Today, I walked in on my sister sitting on the toilet, trying to use "The Force" to pull over the toilet paper roll sitting on the sink. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 243

You deserved it 4 099