Animals and Health: What the Duck?

What the Duck?

By duckyou - 02/04/2018 01:30

Today, on the way to class, I got distracted while watching some ducks and walked face-first into a concrete pole. I ended up with a black eye and three stitches. Even the nurse laughed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 651

You deserved it 1 371

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Same thing different taste

Healthy lifestyle choice

By Rowaelin16 - 23/09/2016 03:31 - United States - Crystal Lake

Today, in an effort to be fitter, I joined a Pilates class. Ten minutes into it, I dropped a 10-pound dumbbell on my face. I now have a horrific looking black eye, and half of my cheek is a mottled green color. Not to mention the cut above my eye that needed 4 stitches. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 824

You deserved it 1 609

Shite day

By Anonymous - 26/06/2023 13:00 - Pakistan - Gujranwala

Today, while coming home from school on my bike, I lost control of it, and went straight into a light pole. Thankfully I was at a very low speed. After that, someone splashed puddle of water at me with their car. After getting to home, I went to take a bath during which the shampoo went into my left eye. It's still hurting. FML

I agree, your life sucks 636

You deserved it 153

By Anonymous - 03/02/2010 20:04 - United States

Today, I walked outside, slipped, busted my head, and had to get 7 stitches. Turns out my son thought it would be funny to spray the sidewalk with water last night so it would freeze. He got a laugh, and I spent over $100 on the stitches. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 428

You deserved it 2 932

Show off

By a stupid jackass - 22/06/2012 01:28 - United States - New York

Today, I got lunch with a girl I really like. On the way, for some idiotic reason I decided it would be a good idea to show off by jumping up to high-five the red hand on a traffic sign. I ended up slipping and slamming full-force into the pole. I now have a bruise on my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 938

You deserved it 37 551

By mark807 - 28/04/2012 06:52 - United States - Pittsburgh

Today, I fell and hit my head on hard concrete. When I went to the emergency room for a CT Scan, the nurse hit me in the head with an IV pole. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 501

You deserved it 2 168

By locker - 16/09/2010 20:06 - United States

Today, I was in a hurry trying to get into my locker, but it stuck. After a few frustrating attempts, I finally managed to get it open. In anger, I threw the door open, but it bounced back and hit me in the head. My natural reflex was to jerk forward, giving myself a black eye from the hook inside. I got in a fight with my locker and lost. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 653

You deserved it 13 757

By Anonymous - 14/03/2011 04:49 - United States

Today, while practicing my gymnastics routine on the uneven bars, I was so distracted by my teammates' conversation about a party later that I miscalculated my flip and smacked my head on a bar. Ten stitches and a concussion later, I was left alone in the hospital. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 653

You deserved it 15 639

Snap!

By wheelchairgirl - 16/12/2016 01:21 - Denmark

Today, I was watching a beautiful flock of birds flying overhead while walking in the street. The guy next to me was lucky enough to catch bird poop with his forehead. I was lucky enough to get distracted by it, trip, and break my ankle. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 383

You deserved it 1 120

By ke - 29/01/2010 05:10 - United States

Today, I did something clever at work and I was telling one of the other girls about it. I said "Just using my noodle" and went to tap my temple but instead I jabbed myself in the eye. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 855

You deserved it 30 874

Funny how?

By funnyguyNOT - 05/04/2009 21:39 - United States

Today, a car was waiting for me to cross the street so I thought it would be funny to slowly limp across the street. When I got to the end, I jumped as high as I could to show I was faking. Turns out I tripped and hit my head hard on the sidewalk. That car took me to the hospital. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 305

You deserved it 285 179

RichardPencil 30

Monday 2 April 2018 2:32

This is the second and extremely rare definition of “Duck-Face Selfie.”

John Nemeth 14

Monday 2 April 2018 2:59

Come on we know the real story here. You got jumped by a couple of ducks. My aunt got taken down by one.

Comments

Glowworm56 26

Tuesday 27 March 2018 3:00

Looks like you should have ducked!

ARISKomuniszt 24

Monday 2 April 2018 1:59

Ducking hell...

LAUGHINGKOMODO 25

Monday 2 April 2018 2:10

But she laughed because it is funny lol. Nothing too serious and you did walk into a pole so..

Glowworm56 26

Monday 2 April 2018 2:25

Duck Duck Pole just doesn't have the same ring to it as Duck Duck Goose.

RichardPencil 30

Monday 2 April 2018 2:32

This is the second and extremely rare definition of “Duck-Face Selfie.”

John Nemeth 14

Monday 2 April 2018 2:59

Come on we know the real story here. You got jumped by a couple of ducks. My aunt got taken down by one.

ChromoTec 24

Monday 2 April 2018 3:16

Your username says it all

Donut_Wizard 23

Monday 2 April 2018 3:43

I think we will need some concrete evidence in order to believe this ducktale.

CrazyTrainWreck 19

Monday 2 April 2018 3:46

Well sounds like you ran a fowl of the pole.

RichardPencil 30

Monday 2 April 2018 4:17

I tried to write “ducking,” but autocorrect changed it to “*******!” I have finally triumphed over ******* auto-correct and have made it my bitch! I’m happy to manually override the 1 in a thousand times when I really want “ducking.”