Creepy, TMI and Miscellaneous: Why did you tell me that? - FML

Why did you tell me that?

By mymomplucksbutthair - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my mom confessed to me that she used to pluck my step-dad's butt hair. I hope the brain-gods delete this obnoxious mental picture. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 278

You deserved it 3 491

Winter: Snow and Funny News
Snuggle up and laugh with our winter stories, where snow isn't the only thing sliding around! More…

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Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 30/01/2016 21:54

Today, my dad decided I was too hairy and taught me to shave. This would be a great bonding experience if I weren't a girl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 865

You deserved it 2 358

Thanks for the info

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2017 but it's good stuff

Today, my mother told my boyfriend a cute story about me when I was little. The one where my cousin and I were caught pooping in a urinal in the church basement. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 848

You deserved it 634

Suspicious

By StevieMe - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - Canada

Today, I was at work laminating a large photo. While I was doing this, I had a sudden itch on my nut sack. So I quickly scratched it away. When the customer came to pick up the print, I noticed that one of my pubic hairs had laminated itself on the cheek of the woman in the photograph. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 782

You deserved it 99 808

Thanks, I feel better!

By anon - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - United States - Port Saint Lucie

Today, I told my grandma my boyfriend had cheated on me. She told me that it was my fault for not straightening my hair, and for gaining a few pounds. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 976

You deserved it 3 032

Hungover

By RedheadA - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my husband and I woke up to see my drunk mother passed out on our couch. She was wearing nothing but socks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 652

You deserved it 3 696

Jump scare

By izzy46111 - This FML is from back in 2014 but it's good stuff - United States - Scottsdale

Today, I saw a long black hair coming out of the drain. Thinking it was my sister's, I called her in and pulled it out for her to see, only to realize I was actually pulling out a long brown roach by the antenna. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 479

You deserved it 5 317

By confsused - 16/12/2013 17:49 - Canada - Toronto

Today, I found out that my dad is actually my uncle, and vice-versa. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 952

You deserved it 3 378

Yada yada yade

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, while waiting for my mom to pick me up from university, I took out my phone and pretended to talk to someone. I didn't think people still pointed and laughed, but apparently they do when your mom pulls up and shouts, "Stop pretending to talk to someone." FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 040

You deserved it 33 820

Self defence

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2009 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I went to my grandmother's house to pick up her cat to take him to the vet. She forgot who I was and sprayed me in the face with pepper spray. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 117

You deserved it 2 483

Family values

By Anonymous - This FML is from back in 2013 but it's good stuff - United States - Houston

Today, my future father-in-law showed everyone a picture of his poop because it was "shaped like a banana." My fiancé's whole family thought it was funny and "looked more like a banana than last time." FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 148

You deserved it 4 426

Next

Top comments

xAkonz 10

Wednesday 26 June 2013 8:27

I think it's up to the god Uranus rather than the brain gods.

Ian7890 23

Wednesday 26 June 2013 8:23

Maybe she will pluck yours?

Comments

badgirl00069 19

Wednesday 26 June 2013 13:36

I guess u know u really love someone when ur willing to do anything for them

that_band_nerd 22

Wednesday 26 June 2013 14:59

Thanks for sharing it!

Brock_Dudeson 11

Wednesday 26 June 2013 16:10

Why would she even confess this? What's the point?

Schiffy 18

Wednesday 26 June 2013 16:15

You and everyone who read this..... thanks alot....

worldclassrager 39

Wednesday 26 June 2013 17:51

Why would she tell you that...that's kind of personal.,,

livilaughs 12

Wednesday 26 June 2013 18:07

love the use of the word confessed here! strange

young_weezy_fml 3

Wednesday 26 June 2013 18:47

whaaat

jonha21 11

Wednesday 26 June 2013 19:41

Hahahaha can she pluck mine to will I take a shit :)

LyraAlluse 25

Wednesday 26 June 2013 19:53

Such a touching and romantic story. This is the kind of stuff that they should put in romance novels, because it is true love. Think about it; you would only pluck out the butt hairs of someone you really care about. I find this story to be very cute.

inolongercare 19

Wednesday 26 June 2013 21:26

1) why would someone want their butt hairs plucked? 2) what would compel her to tell you that information?

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Keywords

Awkward Love My ex AITA Jealousy Friends Poopoo peepee Health Embarrassing Sports Proposal Annoying Snow Cold weather Cheating Work Money Relatable Parenting Kids DIY Accident Parents Medication ADHD Weather Miscellaneous Am I overreacting? Relationship advice Weird

The Top

USA, USA, USA, and more precisely Philadelphia. That's where we're landing today. When I first discovered Justin, on 9gag or an awesome website like that, I knew exactly this little guy was perfect to fit in the FML illustrated section. His crazy, c...

I agree, your life sucks 8

You deserved it 8

Today, my grandpa was wearing flip flops and white socks. He entered my restroom, and the moment he did I remembered there was no toilet paper left. I felt too ashamed to interrupt his dump, so I waited for him to ask for paper; he never did, and came out without socks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 524

You deserved it 5 799

The Top

Today, I woke up and it was Monday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 546

You deserved it 11 908

Today, I surprised my boyfriend with lunch at work. He surprised me too, when I caught him making out with one of his coworkers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 551

You deserved it 69

Today, I figured out why my doctor repeatedly warned me to keep regular bowel movements while I recover from childbirth. I now have an anal fissure. It's like giving birth all over again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 776

You deserved it 4 421

Today, after months of searching for any kind of work, I finally received a call. It was McDonald's, but they said I was overqualified for the position. I thought they took anyone with a heart rate. Apparently not. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 699

You deserved it 111

Today, as the manager of a McDonald's, I had to ask a group of high school kids to calm down after several complaints from other guests. Their rational response was to pour soda on my head and throw burgers at me. Upon returning from chasing them out, I sprained my foot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 957

You deserved it 173

Today, I found out that my boyfriend's mother still calls his ex-girlfriend her "future daughter-in-law". FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 125

You deserved it 3 361