Intimacy: Today, the whole family came together to celebrate my grandmother's...

By Anonymous - 14/07/2011 08:40 - Austria

Today, the whole family came together to celebrate my grandmother's 80th birthday. My grandfather read a poem he'd written about how he had taken my grandmother's virginity 60 years ago. It went on for about 30 minutes. FML

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You deserved it 2 875

November 11: Memories and smiles
Historical anecdotes with a light touch to commemorate with a respectful smile. More…

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Same thing different taste

By chickety boom - 02/08/2013 12:41 - United States - Austin

Today, my 70-year-old grandmother held a celebration over officially having divorced my grandfather. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 969

You deserved it 4 303

Sex work is real work

By thatssickkk - 17/02/2010 06:40 - United States

Today, my grandmother decided to tell me about her past as a prostitute. In full detail. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 569

You deserved it 2 727

By Anonymous - 15/11/2012 14:54 - United States - Erie

Today, my family was celebrating my grandma's 90th birthday. I pulled a little prank and got candles that keep relighting. After a few blows, my grandma fainted. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 550

You deserved it 49 541

Mad beliefs

By Anonymous - 12/04/2009 00:20 - United States

Today, my grandmother gave me a huge speech on being abstinent until marriage. Being the honest person that I am, I told her I wasn't a virgin anymore. Instead of being mad and telling me I was going to hell. She asked me what my favourite things to do sexually were. And told me hers in detail. FML

I agree, your life sucks 80 254

You deserved it 20 795

TMI great-grannie!

By Anonymous - 08/02/2024 21:00

Today, at a big family wedding, my great nana shared quite loudly with us that most of the people in the pub wouldn’t exist if at 15 she hadn’t dumped her lying boyfriend, then made herself feel better by losing her virginity to an Italian waiter and accidentally becoming pregnant with my grandma. FML

I agree, your life sucks 477

You deserved it 154

By Anonymous - 02/09/2019 04:00 - New Zealand - Invercargill

Today, during a family reunion, my 89 year-old grandma stood up and drunkenly made a speech about how ashamed I should be of myself for still being single. She then passed out at the table. Half my family got up to help her, the other half whispered in agreement. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 807

You deserved it 164

By GrandmasWhore - 04/04/2009 05:59 - United States

Today, my grandma gave me the 'abstinence' speech. I had thought she already left to go back to FL but then came into my room to tell me how proud she was of me to keep my virginity. I was doing it doggie-style with my boyfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 246

You deserved it 90 484

By fuck you, gran - 09/03/2013 00:38 - United States - Ashland

Today, my family threw me my 21st birthday party. My grandma's gift turned out to be a pack of condoms. "Not that you'll ever get to use them," she said, turning and walking off, cackling maniacally. Now I remember why I never talk to the old crone. FML

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You deserved it 4 088

Relationship specialist

By Anonymous - 16/10/2023 13:00

Today, I attended a family reunion, during which my grandma gave me "relationship advice" in front of everyone. She's been married five times, and her longest marriage lasted a whole 6 months. FML

I agree, your life sucks 675

You deserved it 87

By Anonymous - 14/07/2018 05:00

Today, my 92-year-old great-grandfather ran down the stairs in excitement, despite his severe arthritis. He told my great-grandmother that he was having the first erection in over 10 years, and grandma ordered me to leave so they could do it right there. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 725

You deserved it 776

saIty 17

Thursday 14 July 2011 15:51

He must have been very specific if it went on for 30 minutes.

Soloman212 28

Thursday 14 July 2011 15:48

How romantic! I'm sure the whole family enjoyed it. Did you ask for an encore?

Comments

Sniper3000 0

Thursday 14 July 2011 15:44

that must have been horrible srry op

adamcole20 0

Thursday 14 July 2011 16:03

grandpas are awesome

tittymagic 0

Thursday 14 July 2011 17:39

old people are the best. kid: grandma will you please say grace? grandma: oh grace died 10 years ago kid. lol

Iamnotmyself 17

Thursday 14 July 2011 18:06

And then I passionately squeezed her buns, and a fire erupted inside like a volcano bursting at the sunset. Our screams of joy brought forward the feeling of bliss and angry complaints from next door neighbors.