By only 10 more hours to go - 06/01/2012 11:40 - United States

Spicy
Today, at work, I slipped and fell on my backside. The creepy security guard offered to 'kiss it better.' FML
I agree, your life sucks 33 299
You deserved it 3 383
Winter: Snow and Funny News
Snuggle up and laugh with our winter stories, where snow isn't the only thing sliding around! More…
Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

Next

Top comments

Torva_fml 16

What a romantic! He sure knows how to get a lady...

139 9
cradle6 13

What an asshole. You should have yelled, "KISS MY ASS!" Oh wait...

109 8

Comments

Torva_fml 16

What a romantic! He sure knows how to get a lady...

139 9
brendafriesen 5

Comment moderated for rule-breaking.

Show it anyway
2 57
Torva_fml 16

*facepalm* Please, tell me you're joking...... Do I need to insert a (sarcasm) next time?

61 2
Bobissmall 13

Steps to being romantic and not creepy: 1) Be attractive 2) Don't be unattractive

49 5
Awsumuzzie 12

1, I've realized that to be completely understood by all, you have to lower your IQ by at least 80%, I'm just offering to help. Also, we all know how romantic it is to give CPR, he should have offered that instead! Kiss and jiggle ;)

15 4
Bobissmall 13

It would also be a sick world we live in, where someone can get sued or fired for a comment like that. I shouldn't need to explain that what is considered "creepy" is subjective, and that the guy may not have even realised he was saying something which could have been construed as sexual.

14 17
Torva_fml 16

Steps to romance (legit ones): 1. Don't be an idiot 2. It's not all about looks 3. Above is dumb. 4. Rock lee isn't cool. 5. You can s..... Nevermind, they'll moderate me.

12 22
mrfreak219 3

#11 Sexual Harassment? It's a joke! Like Bobissmall said, the OP wouldn't conisder it creepy if the security guard wasn't old or ugly.

6 4
Bobissmall 13

Rock Lee is amazing, obviously. Why do you say these harsh things? And there are several videos on YT poking fun at how easy it is to "Sexually Harass" someone, but how looks can play a large part! There is no point arguing over this however, as we each will have our own opinions, and it seems that mine is the least popular judging by the down votes.

13 6
changesinme 0

That's when you say KISS MY ARSE and start running

2 18
Torva_fml 16

Sorry 49, you're an hour late. Replying to my comment doesn't mean you said it first. But nice try.

6 7
rimmyJ 0

Well..did you let him kiss it better?

65 5
ForeverUnemplyed 0

Maybe he is some kind of wizard with special healing kisses, using the janitor job as a disquise hmmmm.....

7 4
ForeverUnemplyed 0

Fawkk I misread this fml -_-

3 9
Thatoneguy021 0

You shouldve told him "sure if you think back hair is sexy" :)

6 0
cooLING 0

Somehow, I get the feeling that you went to OW...

2 0
narrowords 18

That's when you say, "No, but f*^# you very much."

49 4
TheDrifter 23

Exactly, but with a smile, he can't help looking creepy, but I'm sure he'll appreciate being turned down politely for a change.

3 1
Teehee2 0

That security guard might miscontrue that as I want to fuc you very much.

7 1
Jakesterk96 8

No, that's when you say kiss my.... Wait a minute....

13 2
VoodooGypsy 2

It doesn't help to be mean to protection. He may not try to save you if a disaster happens.

1 2
theten_fml 9

OP: and now I feel like new again!

13 1
thenoobftw 3

He just wants to make you feel better.

4 14
cradle6 13

What an asshole. You should have yelled, "KISS MY ASS!" Oh wait...

109 8
markrs 0

I'm guessing he also offered to follow you all the way home without your permission...Oh, you didn't know Op?

21 3