Kids: Today, my 3-year-old pooped his pants in a public bathroom. As...

By Anonymous - 29/06/2015 21:52 - United States - Tupelo

Today, my 3-year-old pooped his pants in a public bathroom. As I was squatting down, doing my best to clean poop off of his legs and the floor, a wasp flew up my pant leg. I was stung four times before I danced it out of my pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 055

You deserved it 1 845

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By targetlove - 10/01/2010 01:23 - Australia

Today, I was in a rush to get to the toilet, I went in and sat on the seat. Then I felt a stinging pain on my left bum cheek. I jumped up quickly to see a wasp splashing around in the bowl. It stung me, and now have a bum cheek twice its normal size, and pee all over my pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 305

You deserved it 3 414

By life_sucks - 16/01/2010 18:46 - New Zealand

Today, this huge wasp started flying around me. I freaked out and started running from it. Then I slipped, landed face-first in some dog poo, and got stung by the wasp on my leg. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 026

You deserved it 7 525

Shitty situation

By Anonymous - 21/11/2022 22:00

Today, I had explosive diarrhea. I got off the toilet to change my 3 year-old's poopy diaper. He was being stubborn, so I was going to go back to the toilet, which is when he laid down. I thought I could do it. I couldn't. He ran around diaperless as I ran back to the toilet with liquid shit running down my leg. FML

I agree, your life sucks 952

You deserved it 182

By peepants - 04/06/2019 14:00

Today, I was in a public restroom with my one-year old. I had no idea he could reach the lock until he opened the door and ran out. In my haste to catch him, I not only peed all over my pants that were still around my ankles, I faceplanted on the nasty, moist bathroom floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 222

You deserved it 334

By matchristityler - 09/02/2010 08:19 - United States

Today, my son pooped in his diaper and managed to somehow take it off without my knowledge. He then sat down on the carpet and imitated a dog with worms, all the way down the hallway, through the living room, and into my bedroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 632

You deserved it 4 378

By jbhadafuckedupday - 15/03/2018 01:30

Today, my 3-year-old came to me very excited because he had gone to the bathroom by himself for the first time. What he did not tell me was that he had shit on the floor, and when I went into the bathroom to check, I slipped on a turd and knocked myself out on the sink. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 093

You deserved it 450

Fire hose

By pissedoffandon - 06/05/2009 14:07 - United Kingdom

Today, I was taking a piss at the urinal when a fly started buzzing around my head. It started getting in my face, so I tried to swat it away. After about 10 seconds of intense swatting, I looked down to find I had pissed all over my shoes and down the front of my trousers. FML

I agree, your life sucks 15 942

You deserved it 61 823

By Dafawk - 19/06/2016 20:54

Today, I took my two-year-old out to dinner. During dinner, our son went to the bathroom three times. As we were getting ready to leave he kept saying he had to go potty. He had gone multiple times, so I thought he would be fine. As he stood up, a giant turd fell on the floor in front of everyone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 299

You deserved it 6 509

Revealing

By doody - 30/12/2009 22:42 - United States

Today, I was in a busy airport bathroom with my three year-old son. While in the process of pulling my pants down, my son decided to open the stall door. I jumped up to yank the door closed, but not before the line of waiting women saw me with my pants wrapped around my ankles. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 258

You deserved it 4 282

By Bob - 20/06/2009 04:22 - United States

Today, while teaching at a daycare, a child came up to me and asked if he could go to the bathroom. Obviously, I said it was fine. He then pulled his pants down, and pee on my brand new shoes, and all over my leg. FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 075

You deserved it 4 734

pikachurro 18

Tuesday 30 June 2015 11:18

Didn't you know squats make your booty nicer? The wasp just wanted a piece, you can't blame him.

Cassandra2015 21

Tuesday 30 June 2015 11:23

Sounds like mom deserves a glass of wine after those misfortunes !

Comments

earljonez 22

Tuesday 30 June 2015 11:15

I hate wasps

odamaliekh 26

Tuesday 30 June 2015 11:52

Cool story.

DFMLharsh 20

Tuesday 30 June 2015 12:19

You hate em bee-cause they sting?

whycantisignup 24

Tuesday 30 June 2015 14:32

#17, buzz off

Domlovesyou1108 10

Tuesday 30 June 2015 11:16

ouch :(

_awwhellnaw_ 45

Tuesday 30 June 2015 11:16

That was a wild ride from beginning to end.

pikachurro 18

Tuesday 30 June 2015 11:18

Didn't you know squats make your booty nicer? The wasp just wanted a piece, you can't blame him.

sonasonic 34

Tuesday 30 June 2015 12:03

You don't get a piece by stabbing someone with a poison stinger repeatedly.....

False_Stupidity 41

Tuesday 30 June 2015 20:57

You don't? Damn, I've been doing it wrong all this time!

4WheelBurnout 14

Thursday 2 July 2015 20:54

Sounds like a shitty situation

StickyPickles 33

Tuesday 30 June 2015 11:22

The joys of parenthood. . .

Cassandra2015 21

Tuesday 30 June 2015 11:23

Sounds like mom deserves a glass of wine after those misfortunes !

chinaski7628 32

Tuesday 30 June 2015 20:32

Or dad. There's no gender listed, but I know a lot of fathers who take a wasp sting in the ass for their kids. Either way, this parent deserves a reward :)