I was right all along

By 3peeps - This FML is from back in 2011 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, I came to the conclusion that I was right about thinking how much it would hurt to hit your head on a door-frame, stub your toe on a stone table leg, and then trip over your cat, who won't take it well and will probably claw your recently stubbed toe. FML
I agree, your life sucks 25 811
You deserved it 4 057

Same thing different taste

Not a morning person at the best of times

By shouldhavestayedinbed - This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff - United Kingdom

Today, my doorbell rang while I was still in bed. I leapt out and immediately got a severe cramp in one leg, then, staggering around trying to throw some clothes on, I scraped the other leg badly enough to draw blood. When I got to the door there was nobody there, just a parcel on the doorstep. FML
I agree, your life sucks 13 698
You deserved it 2 180

Top comments

Comments

SecretMe00 5

Ya, seriously... I hope the cat is ok. And what's OP mean by he came to the conclusion that it would hurt?! Isn't that common sense, you stub your toe, etc and there WILL be pain experienced.

If you want my straight-up opinion I think most cats are not "ok". I swear they purposely put themselves in these positions so they have an excuse to scratch the living daylights out of any available body part.

nixter5 18

That and when you slam your hip on the corner of a wall. You feel like you've been shot!

GoW_Chick 14

Or when you bash your funny bone on the corner of a table, I know that makes me curse like a sailor.

Or when you hit your head on a metal shelf. I did that yesterday and cussed like lil Wayne.

nixter5 18

"Man F*ck these bi*ch a** shelves!!!"

GoW_Chick 14

Just the image of that made made me cringe. And did you mean pesky(damn I don't think that's spelled right) or is pesty some new interweb term I'm not famliar with?

Am I the only one who got 97's reference?

SloaneJoyyBooty 0
sugarandspice33 0

Trying to hurt yourself, are you? Tsk tsk

It does sound as though the OP has had many philosophical musings on this particular hypothetical sequence of events prior to their actual occurrence...

BeaterOfTheDrums 15

Too many big words... My brain hurts..

Can anyone translate #71 to modern day English?

It sounds more like the OP had contemplated this exact sequence of events in full before its occurrence. Which implies either an incredibly dubious coincidence or doing it intentionally. Either that or they were just trying to make it sound "funnier" by being excessively loquacious.

You thought about how much this would all hurt?