By ididntevendrinkthatnight - 07/06/2013 05:14 - United States - Brooklyn

Today, I got mugged on the way to my 21st birthday party at a bar. I begged the thug to at least throw me my ID, only to have him laugh and run away singing, "Happy Birthday." FML
I agree, your life sucks 61 915
You deserved it 3 990
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Top comments

Ambient25 24

Don't worry OP, his luck will run out sooner or later. For all you know he might just be the guy who accidentally gets hit by a car a few blocks away, "accidentally".

140 8

Comments

friedpwnadge 25

I woulda got up and beat the shit out of him, no one ***** with you on your own birthday.

5 12
hemz_fml 13

I hope you filed a report. I hope this will be just a laughing matter as your life goes on.

3 2
MikeonFML 17

I know this is threadjack, but you can use your passport if you have one.

2 1
FALLENSEBZERO 16

ID have kicked him if he weren't looking ;)

126 24
mif_fml 27

I'll give the pun a 6. But we need to start raising the bar on these..

58 6
Ambient25 24

not to mention the logic behind it. Yes, kick him, because he robbed OP with water balloons and a masked teddy bear.... And yes, out of 7, because prime numbers are wonderful to end on

46 6
Bakarra 22

More like lower the BAR... no holds BARred man! Let these BARely understandable, incredibly cheesy puns flow like ale, which is sold at a BAR!

11 55
FALLENSEBZERO 16

Your attitude sucks. Haha I'm kidding but yeah I know.

4 31
FALLENSEBZERO 16

The fact that you had to emphasise Bar so much by putting it in capitals is sad. Were not retarded, we'll get it ._.

50 16
Ambient25 24

Don't worry OP, his luck will run out sooner or later. For all you know he might just be the guy who accidentally gets hit by a car a few blocks away, "accidentally".

140 8
joawmeens 7

When they find him, tell the cops he was singing Happy Birthday, so he has to pay the copyright holder for it! Although, he might just use your credit card....

11 50
Bakarra 22

Who would claim the copyright for such a repetitive song? Probably that silly "single ladies" girl...

6 22
morganrules123 10

Nothing is more repetitive than "I Don't Care" by Iconapop

14 7
greenfishbait 19

#7 , She's not just a girl. Beyonce is a goddess. Her butt gives me a lady boner.

12 31
CharresBarkrey 15

Doesn't Paul McCartney own the copyright to Happy Birthday? Could've sworn I read that somewhere.

4 14
greenfishbait 19

#35, that was a rumor. It was actually an accountant from New York who bought the rights. I think that there was some sort of auction type deal going on, and Paul McCartney was outbid.

13 1
Enslaved 36

Watching that fan slap Beyonce on her booty while she was in concert was priceless. He's lucky he only got escorted out without Jay-Z waiting there to kick his ass. :P Also copyrights for the "Happy Birthday" song is the reason many example: restaurants come up with their own distorted form of a song. They all seem to end with "HEY!"

16 1
JACKxRAWR 22

Well I just think that it's funny that Beyonce opposes firearms ownership even though her husband is an ex crack dealer.

13 5
RedPillSucks 31

Why is that funny? She can't have opinions independent of her husband? You do know that plenty of ex-gang bangers reform them selves and talk to kids about the problems of the gang lifestyle. Things aren't so simpleminded.

18 1
greenfishbait 19

I'm kind of lost on how firearms and crack are related?

5 7
kiskraze 7

I guess that thug really needed your ID to go out too :D

6 35
Bakarra 22

The first of many bar stories you have yet to tell, and you haven't even started drinking yet!

61 4
pokemai 6

Yeah, you know that thug is going partying tonight ;)

5 9
hama806 19

I hope your 21st year gets better for you. Think positive. And happy birthday!

24 4
landon_loe11 16

Some people just want to watch the world burn.

19 5
HungerGames95 13

I appreciate the reference to The Dark Knight :)

1 5
pmadNess 16

85- that phrase has been around a lot longer than The Dark Knight movie...

4 2
alfred07 18

I hope that you got a good enough look at his face to describe it to the police

10 14