By f_n_fail - 06/12/2016 21:31 - United States
By KingKralj - 04/12/2016 21:49 - United States - San Ramon
KingKralj tells us more.
By buttpain - 01/12/2016 18:29
By purpletrout - 30/11/2016 06:39 - United States - Lansing
Suspicious Minds
By Kelly - 29/11/2016 18:57
By Pissy - 27/11/2016 20:15
By Babysitter Probs - 27/11/2016 05:58 - United States - Fresno
By Wanaaa - 25/11/2016 07:08 - France - Toulouse
By Anonymous - 24/11/2016 13:17 - United States - New York
By don't cry over spilled milk - 23/11/2016 14:33 - United States - Elmendorf Afb
Fashion influencer
By children ain't pawns - 21/11/2016 15:23 - Australia - Perth
By shanson - 07/11/2016 14:06 - United States - San Antonio
By poormanslucyliu1 - 07/11/2016 02:28
Cheap and gross
By ilovemypup - 31/10/2016 11:20
Close to you
By Angel - 25/10/2016 20:54
By jwolt92 - 25/10/2016 02:27 - United States - Bourbonnais
By Amie89 - 09/10/2016 04:37 - United States - Toledo
Amie89 tells us more.
Hey, OP here. The FML was poorly written, mostly because they never get published so, who would care, right? Oops. Sorry! My husband and I have been actively trying to conceive for a while now, and he's a truck driver who's only home on weekends, so it's doubly difficult. These past few weeks, I've been very moody and having odd (for me) food wants, so we were really hopeful, but Aunt Flo showed up, so hopes were dashed. Looking back, I've had some new stresses in my life that probably contributed to the moodiness, as I'm usually a fairly even-tempered person. And, as I can't afford healthcare (we make too much for assistance but not enough to actually afford any plans), getting checks would cost more than we could pay. In a month or so, his job will offer company-wide health care, so we'll see what happens then. :)
By JEHR - 07/10/2016 07:21 - Canada - Prince George
JEHR tells us more.
OP here to answer some of your burning questions. Really, FML for all involved, but the crown goes to the dog. He isn’t butthurt about it anymore. I watched for blood and any signs of pain in his next stool because I know what sharp, jabby appendages toddler fingers are and it was like any other shit. He also received boiled chicken breast to alleviate the emotional trauma and a lot of praise for his stand-up response to the whole shit show. To clarify a few others and add some detail: 1. No one got bit. I’ve got a hell of a bombproof dog and he and the kid are tight. He did leap like a gazelle though. Fair to say he was surprised. 2. Wet wipes are a parent’s best friend. Too bad I only had spit and a Kleenex. 3. The amateur veterinarian’s diagnosis was ‘stinky.’ And he wasn’t very happy about it. 4. I don’t know if some people are aware but toddlers tend to throw high emotion, physically aggressive tantrums because they are developmentally limited in their ability to appreciate consequences, exercise restraint, and use non-physical methods to express themselves, especially when upset. It’s normal, he’s two, that’s what they do. 5. This was his first anal offense although he’s previously expressed interest in the brown hole that he’s not allowed to touch ever since he came to be eye level with it. He really had no appreciation of what he was doing and how it would affect the dog. 6. But yes, he did receive ‘discipline’ in the form of a calm, firm reprimand for acting in violence and, when he calmed down enough, a limited discussion of appropriate behaviour and a teachable moment where he came to understand that he had hurt our dog. Little guy was upset by it and apologetic. It went way better than anticipated. 7. People who think children suck for reasons such as this undervalue the insane mileage I’m going to get out of this one for years to come. 8. He’s a really awesome kid with a good heart, but human (surprise). I’m actually pretty sad Trip didn’t add anything but #14 gave me a laugh. I also don't know what he's going to be a 'social path' quite means, but I'm alright if he turns out extroverted.
By jaimpastaggle - 06/10/2016 14:24 - France
By Pissed.Off.Mom. - 06/10/2016 05:14 - United States - Houston
By Anonymous - 03/10/2016 23:50 - United States - Westerville
By padre74 - 03/10/2016 17:31 - United States - Jackson
By Fffhjno - 28/09/2016 18:15 - United States - Providence
By Rizmo - 25/09/2016 07:11 - United States - Cedar City
By sweet pea - 22/09/2016 21:48 - Canada - Red Lake
Zzzzzzz
By Alyssa - 21/09/2016 07:17 - United States - Spring Park
By AnonymousCow - 20/09/2016 13:04 - Australia - Perth
By adults acting like children - 17/09/2016 20:31 - United States - Danvers
Keywords


Holy sweet shit, this got posted! Hello guys, OP here! I was angry when making this FML that I left out some pretty important details :P So here we go. My bro and I were having an argument about something stupid, and it escalated pretty bad. I hate full on yell-fests, so I left the scene and decided to fly my drone to relax. My brother, on the other hand, somehow got drunk and thought it would be a good idea to shoot my drone with his BB gun for revenge (no, he didn't get it on my b-day nor are we twins. He had it for a while). Long story short, he loaded the gun and shot my drone several times over. I yelled at him for like 10 seconds (I know I mentioned I hate yelling, but I was angry :l) and left the house. Later, he called me and apologized for destroying my drone and offered to either repair it or buy a new one out of his pocket. I said "eh, just buy it." because the drone was too damaged to be repaired. So the aftermath was we made up, he bought me a new drone, and we lived happily ever after c: