You know, communication works wonders. Have you tried telling him to be gentler? And what you prefer? Because if not you definitely deserve it. Because he then doesn’t know he’s doing anything wrong.

My foreplay technique is to line her up then say "Brace yourself, Ellie. Here it comes."

Buy a toy

And some say that men can't find the clitorus.

Tell him to buy a nail clippers!!!!😂

If you haven't taught him what you like by now that's kinda on you.

There’s an assumption that people need to “just know” how to do sexual activities but Sex Ed is barely taught in school + no one is born with a built-in manual. Also, generally people don’t go around reading a “how to have sex” book - although there are many great sources. My point is... we normalize sharing our preferences on food we want, movies we want to watch, whether we want go out/or not etc - but for some reason, we shy away from telling the other what we want during sex? Or how it works for us? This assumption needs to be squashed. Sex communication, like any other, solves many problems.

OP here! To all those who say this is my fault for not telling him, believe me I've tried! If I say to be gentle, he will until I look like I'm enjoying it, then he'll go harder again. Thanks ****! Telling him he's scratching me get a "I know what I'm doing!!!" I could ignore this when I was dating, because sex itself is great, so is other foreplay, just the manual foreplay sucks. Now we're married it's the only way he wants to warm me up. His penis knows what it's doing, the rest of him struggles.