Relationships, Weird, Relatable, Scams and Documentary: Abalaschabalamanama

Abalaschabalamanama

By help meeeee - 14/03/2021 17:01

Today, and ever since we watched a documentary about televangelists scamming people, my boyfriend randomly imitates them speaking "in tongues" because he knows it freaks me out. He's really good at it as well. FML

I agree, your life sucks 794

You deserved it 180

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Same thing different taste

By bronieswillrule5eva - 11/06/2012 18:16 - Canada - Summerside

Today, I overheard my boss and a co-worker talking about me. Apparently when I speak, I slur my words so badly that it sounds like I'm speaking in tongues. According to my boss, "he could be possessed by a demon right now, and we'd never even notice." FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 701

You deserved it 3 485

Gotta get that clout

By Debate bros STFU - 26/07/2021 06:01

Today, my live-in boyfriend spent yet another evening trying to bait Twitch streamers into a debate about stuff he barely understands. He's obsessed with "growing his audience", and I'm getting tired of his bullshit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 794

You deserved it 162

By Anonymous - 08/09/2009 14:04 - United States

Today, I was sitting with my boyfriend watching the Super Nanny. He watches the show regularly and said he has learned some of her techniques. Apparently, he uses them on me when I'm acting irrational. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 956

You deserved it 47 568

By theawfulpresent - 30/01/2013 00:28 - United States - Germantown

Today, my boyfriend tried to hypnotize me into breaking up with him. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 421

You deserved it 3 448

Noise annoys

By Anonymous - 07/12/2009 05:31 - United States

Today, I told my boyfriend he is good at singing. Now he won't stop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 046

You deserved it 42 027

David Attenborough

By types - This FML is from back in 2012 but it's good stuff - United States

Today, my boyfriend decided he was going to narrate everything I do. I can't get him to stop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 480

You deserved it 3 741

By ahhhhhhh - 30/07/2019 14:00

Today, my daughter was acting strange. When she wasn’t muttering in some strange language, she was talking about invisible people coming to get me. Terrified, I called my boyfriend. Turns out he taught her that as a prank. He knows I’m afraid of anything supernatural. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 635

You deserved it 624

By wooed - 03/12/2009 03:15 - United States

Today, I found out that my boyfriend of 2 months has been faking his southern accent. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 548

You deserved it 9 026

By Beeper - 11/10/2014 19:07 - United States - Champaign

Today, as always, I have Tourette's syndrome. It causes me to occasionally make a beeping noise. My boyfriend just figured out that if he beeps back, it makes me beep again. He thinks it's hilarious and won't stop. FML

I agree, your life sucks 57 705

You deserved it 5 234

By atleasthelistened - 09/03/2016 08:04 - United States - Spokane

Today, I discovered my boyfriend listens way better in his sleep than he does when he's awake. FML

I agree, your life sucks 18 547

You deserved it 2 451

TomeDr 24

Sunday 14 March 2021 18:07

So, what freaks HIM out? Turnabout is fair play, after all!

RichardPencil 30

Sunday 14 March 2021 18:57

Tell him to "blah-lah-lah giggity-goo!" That's "**** off" in Tounges.

Comments

TomeDr 24

Sunday 14 March 2021 18:07

So, what freaks HIM out? Turnabout is fair play, after all!

RichardPencil 30

Sunday 14 March 2021 18:57

Tell him to "blah-lah-lah giggity-goo!" That's "**** off" in Tounges.

BurnInDemonFire 34

Monday 15 March 2021 2:38

Remind yourself it's all fake, tell him to stop acting like an idiot, and if he refuses smack him in the nuts until he learns.

Warp1978 15

Monday 15 March 2021 10:37

Revenge is a dish best served in the middle of the night when he's asleep

April Perry 5

Monday 15 March 2021 17:37

I mean not really fml it's funny 🙊🙊

Alan 54

Monday 15 March 2021 17:49

The two aren't incompatible! Funny stuff is why we launched FML way back in 2009 and… my, doesn't time fly.

Keywords

Awkward Miscellaneous Embarrassing Work Sleep Dating Love Am I overreacting? Annoying Parents Health Mental health Furniture Kids Gross Friends Public freakouts Fight Cops Drugs Neighbours Medication Relatable Animals Dogs Teenagers Gamers Ironic Video games Job interview

The Top

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I agree, your life sucks 12

You deserved it 18

Today, I was at a guy's house that I’d been seeing for a while. After watching a movie, I confessed that after these past few times we’ve hung out, I’ve started to catch feelings. He looked at me and said, "I actually don’t think I want anything serious, but are you down to be friends with benefits?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 547

You deserved it 476

The Top

Today, I opened up to my best friend about my depression. Her response: "If you're so depressed, why don't you just kill yourself?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 203

You deserved it 2 217

Today, I bought my nephew some giant green Incredible Hulk fists for his birthday. He thanked me by Hulk-smashing me in the nuts. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 005

You deserved it 6 401

Today, my brother dyed my white work shirt bright green because I beat him to the shower this morning. As it's my only shirt, I had to wear it to work, where there was a surprise audit and I was fired for incorrect uniform. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 702

You deserved it 1 506

Today, while I was normally and gently cleaning my glasses with my shirt they snapped in half. This is the second time this has happened, with the exact same glasses. The optometrist got me another pair last time, but this time they said no because it was too suspicious. I now have to buy $150 glasses again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 370

You deserved it 623

Today, on the way home from a night out, I crossed the main road in my town via the traffic lights. As I got to the other side, a guy turned to his two friends and 'whispered' with a look of disgust, "I would have run that one over." Thanks. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 612

You deserved it 2 688

Today, I tried to propose to my girlfriend of 5 years. I love her so much and I've been treating her extremely well. Before I could pop the question, she said in these exact words: "Babe, our relationship is like a drunken night. Fun while it lasted but its something I'd rather forget." FML

I agree, your life sucks 63 271

You deserved it 3 543