Bad boy

By Sissy - 06/12/2009 00:04 - United States

Today, I was standing in a long line at the Post Office when my 3 year-old son started rubbing up and down my leg. I asked him what he was doing and he said loudly, "I'm humping you like Simon humps me!" Everyone looked at me in shocked horror. Simon is our dog. FML
I agree, your life sucks 36 284
You deserved it 3 371
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Top comments

null_fml 11

Before reading the last sentence, I assumed he meant a dog. I'm sure everyone around did too. Embarrassing still, but not as bad as it could be.

100 1
glorbnakcs 0

Solution: Mention to those around you that Simon is your dog. Not really a big deal.

61 1

Comments

ShaydeStar 0

Oh my....kids are so f'ing adorable...and weird.

1 6
jonny2x4 0

I've heard a 2-year old call his mom a bitch. I hope this kid didn't have a boner like the dog did.

5 0
Vedder 0

YDI for giving your dog a human name. Name your next dog "Mr. Hanson from across the street".

2 5
Ashbashcrashed 0

Ha. But it only works if the next dog goes around acting like a paedo too. So instead RENAME your dog Simon "Mr. Hanson from across the street".

3 1
MetalCraze 11

Your son is a nasty little freak where did he hear a word like hump? YDI it for using those words around your kid your a bad parent and you kid needs a shrink

2 3
gonzolove 0

Don't call someone's kid a nasty little freak, that's completely rude and uncalled for. Little kids repeat whatever they hear. I doubt the kid knows that humping is a sexual act, he probably just knows that it's that funny thing the dog does sometimes.

1 3
myballs 0

You deserve it for not teaching your child not to be stupid. It is intolerable; you deserve to be embarrassed.

2 6
iCameraJunkie 0

It's funny..but so weird >_

2 1
JAK3ZORZ 0

You see, if your name was Simon, or your brother's name was simon, this would really be an FML... I hope everyone thinks you're a chomo....

4 1
blastvortex 3

Haha. Kids will do anything for attention, won't they.... Of course, how does your 3-year-old kid know a word like that if he isn't in bad company? If you don't like it, then perhaps you should be considering what kind of a parent you've been.

3 0
Moemoemoe_fml 0

You let your dog molest your child. D: The times our dog TRIED to hump me, my mom reacted with such ferocity that it was crazy. Back then I was all surprised wondering why she was so angry at the dog since I had no idea what was going on, but now I know... XD

5 0