Miscellaneous: Bigmouth strikes again

Bigmouth strikes again

By Anonymous - 09/09/2009 09:58 - New Zealand

Today, I was working at a hospital-level rest home. I was making the rounds when I noticed a woman was sitting in her (electric) wheelchair in the middle of the hall. Going closer, I saw her battery was flat so I said, "Uh-oh! Looks like you've died." She bawled her eyes out and said, "Not yet." FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 531

You deserved it 54 632

Winter: Snow and Funny News
Snuggle up and laugh with our winter stories, where snow isn't the only thing sliding around! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By janedoe - 12/02/2009 22:21 - United States

Today, I was volunteering at a nursing home calling bingo numbers. One woman stood up and started making noises, so I assumed she had won and started clapping. She then fell on the floor and died of a heart attack. I essentially applauded her death. FML

I agree, your life sucks 91 810

You deserved it 12 748

By mrdentist - 02/12/2010 13:20

Today, I was cleaning one of my elderly patient's teeth. After finishing and reminding her to floss, I realised she had died. Supposedly she was dead for a good 20 minutes. FML

I agree, your life sucks 69 849

You deserved it 5 538

By Anto - 03/12/2008 06:11 - France

Today, in front of a hospital, I noticed that an old lady was having trouble lighting her cigarette because she had Parkison's. So I went to help her to light it up and she then started chatting with me and told me she had lung cancer. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 926

You deserved it 6 905

Brain freeze

By Anonymous - 13/06/2024 07:00 - United States

Today, I work at a hospice center. At 3AM, a call just went out to a man's family to come because he was dying. I didn't realize that this man was my old friend's grandpa. When I saw her, I smiled really big and said, "Hey! Great to see you!" Her grandpa was ACTIVELY DYING. Stupid stupid stupid. FML

I agree, your life sucks 492

You deserved it 175

Leave it

By caleighrossi - 16/06/2014 00:21 - United States - Ottumwa

Today, I was working my shift at our local nursing home. I was assisting a "sweet", "innocent" 100-year-old lady, and she had a bunch of used tissues balled up in her lap, so I offered to dispose of them in the waste-basket. She told me that if I touched them, she would kill everything I love. FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 608

You deserved it 5 382

By Harejordan - 04/02/2009 16:44 - United States

Today, I was driving and stopped behind a person at a stop sign. Their car didn't move for about 1 minute. I got out of my car yelling at the person. It was an old woman. She wasn't breathing. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 162

You deserved it 36 440

By Anonymous - 05/10/2012 05:49 - United States

Today, while at my job as a hairdresser, I was giving an elderly client a perm and I thought she'd fallen asleep. She'd died. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 643

You deserved it 2 376

By Anonymous - 19/12/2012 17:12 - United States

Today, I was waiting in line to use the bathroom. I complained to the guy next to me about how long the lady was taking. I kept making jokes about it, but he never seemed to laugh. Finally, the door opened and out came a lady in a wheelchair. The guy next to me was her husband. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 460

You deserved it 65 608

By Anonymous - 23/07/2019 22:00

Today, I visited with my cousin on her deathbed. When I asked what she was doing, they replied that she was sleeping. Next thing out my mouth without thinking was, "She can sleep when she's dead." FML

I agree, your life sucks 604

You deserved it 2 427

Adieu

By Pain - 24/02/2024 15:00 - United States

Today, I saw an old friend while out and about. Since I don't leave the house very often, my friend was surprised to see me in person. He jokingly asked if someone was dying, and I cried in response. I was in fact going to the hospital to say goodbye to my grandma. FML

I agree, your life sucks 545

You deserved it 127

AtoZnumbersand_ 1

Wednesday 9 September 2009 16:03

Ydi for saying something like that as a rest home. And who says that? If my phone runs out of battery I don't tell people i'm dead. YDI.

kaisar0 0

Wednesday 9 September 2009 16:03

ZING!

Comments

Calebl 0

Saturday 17 December 2011 4:39

You are a terrible persin

FMLL2016 16

Thursday 3 April 2014 19:01

Person*

LaughingHobbit 4

Monday 9 April 2012 5:10

Dude thts soooo insensitive

chikitty 7

Monday 21 May 2012 22:53

Hahaha that sucks! But it's seriously hilarious.

KingCeltic77 18

Tuesday 17 July 2012 5:15

DUMBASS!

SanaSazi 32

Sunday 28 October 2012 15:52

Plug it in. They go for ages. There's no reason for it to go flat

Sacytrl 28

Saturday 14 September 2013 19:02

I can't say that you're an insensitive prick as you did not mean it literally. However, you should learn to be more tactful with your words, considering the fact that you work in a rest home.

sdroze1389 31

Wednesday 8 January 2014 1:19

brutal. favorites.

FMLL2016 16

Thursday 3 April 2014 18:59

YDI u don't say that shit in a rest home

fantasyworld 37

Saturday 21 November 2015 20:01

You should have been more sensitive with the wording.

everythingelena 28

Saturday 19 December 2015 14:52

I'm sorta torn on this one. FYL cause you ment well in a joking manner. however YDI because you should've been more sensitive to the people living there.