Health: Bushed out

Bushed out

By en3rg1zer21 - 06/08/2011 05:15 - United States

Today, I was peeing when I sneezed. I looked down to see that my gum had flown out of my mouth and gotten caught in my pubes. On the upside, I got a new look. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 430

You deserved it 9 539

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Same thing different taste

Go big or go home

By kinwar - 27/09/2021 07:01 - United States - Hamburg

Today, I sneezed and peed myself while working out at the gym. FML

I agree, your life sucks 904

You deserved it 126

Faulty plumbing

By Anonymous - 08/02/2024 23:00 - United States

Today, after just waking up, I sneezed, which caused me to piss myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 440

You deserved it 113

AKA taking a screenshot

By Anonymous - 05/10/2020 11:02 - United States - White Plains

Today, I was holding in pee because i was so busy at work. When I finally got up to relieve myself, I pulled down my pants, sneezed at that exact moment and peed all over the bathroom floor. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 110

You deserved it 395

Procrastination

By Anonymous - 14/10/2009 17:01 - United States

Today, I had to take a dump. While looking for a book to read, I sneezed. The force of the sneeze caused me to shit my pants. The glob of dung then ran down my leg before falling out of my shorts onto my carpet, all in less than 5 seconds. Nothing in my life has prepared me for this. FML

I agree, your life sucks 98 118

You deserved it 16 740

How smelly is your piss?

By Anonymous - 08/04/2021 21:00 - Finland

Today, I peed myself in the dressing room after work when I sneezed. Someone else just walked in as I was trying to dry off my jeans with paper, and probably smelled that I had peed myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 812

You deserved it 154

By ydahs - 08/05/2009 21:17 - United States

Today, while in the hot tub with my friends, my gum fell out of my mouth and I had no idea where it went. Later that night I realized it had fallen down my swimsuit and had become adhered to my pubic hairs which then stuck to my underwear. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 771

You deserved it 19 621

By lol - 06/12/2009 14:03 - United Kingdom

Today, I sneezed while brushing my teeth and ended up with toothpaste in my eye. I haven't been able to see clearly for two hours. FML

I agree, your life sucks 32 790

You deserved it 4 018

By jack the ripped - 30/04/2016 04:38 - United States

Today, while examining my busted nose in the mirror, I had a sneeze attack. Now it looks like someone got their throat slashed in my bathroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 110

You deserved it 1 472

By Darla - 05/10/2012 08:14 - United States - Arcadia

Today, I realized that at age 54, I'm no longer young enough to go commando anymore. Every time I sneezed today, I peed myself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 744

You deserved it 12 945

By anon - 27/03/2015 20:09 - United States - San Francisco

Today, while getting ready for a job interview, I sneezed while brushing my teeth, splattering toothpaste everywhere and ruining my brand new dress. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 934

You deserved it 4 788

turtlegrl66 11

Saturday 6 August 2011 12:15

At least you can see an upside!

julieseattle 4

Saturday 6 August 2011 12:14

Oh Noooooo!!

Comments

naya_mariie 0

Saturday 6 August 2011 18:41

get it waxed nasty ass bitch. (:

sematariux 7

Saturday 6 August 2011 18:55

31 calm down Dumbass

darkmis1 17

Saturday 6 August 2011 19:17

This is why it's better to shave it all off.

DanielZVans 5

Saturday 6 August 2011 19:24

Damn multitasker

xfyre 11

Saturday 6 August 2011 19:57

that's why i'm clean shaven down there. that also makes it look bigger, and in my case, i need all the help i can get. ;)

xXSKYLARXx 0

Saturday 6 August 2011 21:01

Sticky situation ;D....wow I am so cheesy

lassetob 0

Saturday 6 August 2011 23:20

George Carlin was wrong. It IS possible to sneeze while pissing.

Trent_21 6

Sunday 7 August 2011 0:42

should be shaving anyways.

kaylapple 1

Sunday 7 August 2011 0:44

gross.

briarisafaggot 0

Sunday 7 August 2011 0:45

why the hell wouldn't you shave in the first place?

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The Top

Today, I attended a cooking class with my co-workers. As the chef prepared to cut up a load of onions for his dish, he warned us to be ready for the "typical reactions". Everyone teared up. Meanwhile, I popped a boner. So much for typical. FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 318

You deserved it 9 464

Today, I caught my husband of 13 years looking at other women in Instagram. FML

I agree, your life sucks 214

You deserved it 435

The Top

Today, after submitting my college application, I noticed that I mistyped "math enthusiast" as "meth enthusiast". FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 060

You deserved it 7 971

Today, I was at work, nonchalantly spinning my keys around my finger when they flew off and hit a glass cabinet. Broken glass showered passing customers. I don't think I'll have a job to go to tomorrow. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 453

You deserved it 20 953

Today, on the third day of my first holiday ever, I still have food in my stomach from the first night. Yesterday I tried to walk up the beach and ended up crying in immense pain. I guess a holiday wasn't such a great idea after being diagnosed with gastroparesis a couple of weeks ago. FML

I agree, your life sucks 401

You deserved it 151

Today, our family reunion began with my sister calling my brother's current crazy girlfriend by his last crazy girlfriend's name and ended with my dad telling my adopted niece that he wanted a family picture without her in it, but she could be in the next one. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 315

You deserved it 816

Today, I was going to the bathroom at work. Since I knew it would take a while, I brought my iPod in for entertainment. To bad it disabled me from hearing the continuous knocks on the door as well as the manager eventually picking the lock and busting in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 595

You deserved it 46 599

Today, my boyfriend broke up with me over something that happened 5 years ago. We've only been together for 2 years as of this July. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 730

You deserved it 1 070