Why were you gonba propose? Dont try to be the man. When the time is rit it wilk happen wit the rit guy. Good luck.

well come on, If a guy is secure enough he wont mind being proposed first of all, secondly the guy prolly hasn't proposed n she is getting tired. Just because society has made woman look like the ones that have to be proposed to doesnt mean they cant propose to man.

irony

What movie were you watching? Some teen melodrama?

At least you found out BEFORE you popped the question.

it's an odd situation. Sure, traditionally the guy asks, but it seems like the women tend to think more about marraige than guys do. Probably stems from the fact that from a young age, guys are encouraged to try to get with a lot of girls, and be a 'playa'. Our movies and television shows romanticize the suave, cool guy who can get with any girl he wants, and does in fact get with every girl he wants. Yet the public perception is against women who do the same things. If a guy does it, he's a cool playa. If a girl does it, she's a dirty ****. I think the next logical manifestation of this is that women (at least those with a religious or conservative upbrining, I'm sure there are plenty of exceptions) want to be with one guy, and a ring on her finger is the best way to make sure that that one guy stays with her. Guys, on the other hand, might be more inclined to "play the field" and try out lots of women before settling down. Now, obviously, all of the major religions have a part in creating this stereotype. With their idealized concepts of virginity as a virtue, mostly for women, they discourage women from seeking multiple partners. Perhaps this can be traced back to a more primal need. From a strictly scientific point of view, a man takes anywhere from 3 seconds to 3 hours to make a baby. A woman takes 9 months. In order to spread their genetic legacy as far as possible, it 'makes sense' for a neanderthal man to try to impregnate as many women as possible, to improve the chances that some of them will be able to make children with his genes. However, since a woman is unable to concieve again once she has become pregnant, it 'makes sense' genetically for her to seek one man to impregnate her, then hold onto him to protect her and keep her safe during the vulnerable months of pregnancy, where she is physically weak and immobile. These two aims are at odds to each other. It makes sense, then, that ancient civilizations would try to find a way to reconcile these two genetic habits into a "happy medium", which resulted in the institution of marriage. Women are discouraged from sex before marriage, since without a binding legal contract, she cannot be sure that the man who fathers her child will care for her and provide for her during the pregnancy, rather than just running away. Even now, in 'modern' 2009, most people still frown upon children born to single parents. The invention of birth control has relegated virginity until marriage to a practice performed by only the most devout religious people, since it's simple enough to enjoy sex without having to deal with children. However, our social constructs have not yet evolved to the point of removing these obsolete ideas, since each generation is firmly ingrained with a sense of tradition, doing things a certain way because "That's how it's always been done." The guy asking the woman out, the guy proposing, the girl staying home to take care of the children, the woman taking the man's last name, the woman cleaning the house, these are all irrelevant traditions whose origins are long forgotten, but which are passed down from generation to generation. We've achieved gender equality in a legal sense in that it is acceptable for women to work any job that men can, and for women to be political leaders, and for women to receive proper educations. However, our preconceived notions of what is the proper role of a woman in a relationship and what is the proper role of a man in a relationship remained mired in the past.

Not to be sexist, but there's a reason that it's the guy that proposes and not the girl: the same reason that it's the guy that says "I love you" first. Girls are simply a lot more open to commitment, so they have to wait for the guy to be ready for it, which is easiest if the guy makes the first move.

I would hate it if a girl proposed. I wouldn't really mind if she asked me out, it would be a little weird, but I could deal with that. I just couldn't have a girl propose because I am a traditional man. I would want it to be perfect because it's something that a girl will remember for the rest of her life. It's special for her and the guy should propose.

Not actually proposing + not making a fool of yourself = FML fail. sux4u, but FML doesn't care.

Personally, I wouldn't propose to my current boyfriend. But that's simply because he would probably feel terrible that he didn't get the opportunity to do something incredibly special like ask me to marry him in some elaborate way. I think a lot of people here are assuming that OP is a woman trying to rush into something when the guy isn't necessarily ready. I understand any two people not being ready that commitment at the same exact time. It just happens. She shouldn't necessarily break up with him because of this. And for those who are saying YDI for not knowing him well enough to know his opinion on the subject: Who talks about those things? I'm sure by the time she even considered the fact that she never discussed it with him, she realized asking may spoil the surprise. Anywho, I agree with #83: Since a woman proposing to a man is already "breaking tradition", she most likely wouldn't do it in the same manner a man would. I would more than likely do it in a casual manner, but that's just my style. And, that's what all of this boils down to - personal preference.