Love: Catchy turn of phrase

Catchy turn of phrase

By boinger - 03/06/2009 05:23 - United States

Today, I meant to express to my friends that I was enamored with a young saleswoman I had encountered at a store. I wanted to tell them that she was quite petite and that I am, in general, attracted to petite women. Instead I said, "You know? I like little girls." FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 363

You deserved it 61 118

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Same thing different taste

By SaraSkyWolf - 17/10/2018 22:00

Today, we didn't have much to do at work, so I struck up a conversation with a coworker I have a crush on - a girl with one arm. I wanted to tell her I thought she was pretty, but I ended up saying I thought she looked like a pirate queen. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 820

You deserved it 1 291

By Bucks9 - 07/05/2009 23:43 - United States

Today, I was shopping in the mall. A cute store worker kept checking me out, so after I picked a few things I went up to her and started flirting. After a few seconds, she cut me off and said, "Actually I was watching you because you look like someone who would shoplift." FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 246

You deserved it 7 142

By Teddy Bear - 12/01/2019 16:00

Today, while working in a kids' shop, I absent-mindedly called a small person with his mum a little man. I then hear a deep man's voice say "I'm not a little man." FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 159

You deserved it 573

No

By grlks - 19/02/2009 07:08 - United States

Today, I told a girl that I liked her. She replied, "Don't." FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 108

You deserved it 5 886

By Anonymous - 08/02/2017 19:00 - Ireland - Navan

Today, at work, I bumped into what looked like a small child and said, "Sorry, little man". Turns out he actually was a little person. FML

I agree, your life sucks 7 239

You deserved it 1 155

By Anonymous - 06/02/2011 17:53 - United States

Today, while waiting on a customer at a restaurant, I accidentally asked a midget if she'd like a children's menu. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 755

You deserved it 30 577

Honesty

By bridezilla - 31/12/2014 07:47 - New Zealand - Auckland

Today, I was trying on wedding dresses with my future sister-in-law who is a little bigger than me. We tried on a similar dress and she said it looked better on me because I'm skinny. Instead of saying, 'No way' or 'It looks great on you', I accidentally said 'Yeah, I know'. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 473

You deserved it 35 414

She definitely heard

By Anonymous - 09/09/2021 02:00

Today, I had to go to the mall for a quick errand. While there one of my friends who works at a phone booth was there and I stayed for a little bit chatting with him. While chatting, a girl passed by. She was so pretty that I blurted out, "What a woman!" out loud. Turns out it was my ex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 259

You deserved it 1 431

By Anonymous - 16/06/2017 14:00

Today, I saw the girl I've been crushing hard on. I go up to talk to her, and I'm immediately greeted by, "I like girls." FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 567

You deserved it 796

By Anonymous - 31/10/2014 10:55 - United Kingdom - Pontypridd

Today, my boyfriend told my four-year-old sister that "fatass" means "beautiful lady." I didn't know about this until I took my sister shopping with me. The woman at the till said she was adorable; my sister replied, "Thanks, fatass." FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 609

You deserved it 3 316

CLINTRONxD 0

Wednesday 3 June 2009 16:04

You're right, That totally sucks. But it is hilarious

ohmygawdz 0

Wednesday 3 June 2009 16:07

I bet you do, you little boinger you.

Comments

9876123 0

Thursday 4 June 2009 4:36

Hahaha, that's great! :)

mattmag 0

Thursday 4 June 2009 4:39

It was just your friends. If you can't laugh it off, then get new friends.

Laxguitar37 0

Thursday 4 June 2009 4:42

Hahahah dude megans law creeper! Did you at least correct yourself?

alexpwnsu 0

Thursday 4 June 2009 4:44

That's like saying I get boners at watching little naked girls

mehwhateverr 0

Thursday 4 June 2009 4:56

Lol. But then you just say "little as in short".

avrii 0

Thursday 4 June 2009 4:59

Hahahahahaha thats funny it makes u sound like a creeper aka micheal jackson

toastywafers 0

Thursday 4 June 2009 5:02

Creepyface

sweetdreamz454 0

Thursday 4 June 2009 5:03

#197 wow u retard! Ur juss like the person who wrote the fml! U r both pervvz!!! Lmao jk but #197 ur still a perv and a retard. :)

HaHa_Sux4_U 0

Thursday 4 June 2009 5:04

Hahaha good one creeper

blowup_dollie 0

Thursday 4 June 2009 5:10

I giggle at your plight, good sir. :D

Keywords

Love Cheating Work Money Relatable My ex Jealousy Accident Health Medication ADHD Snow Weather Miscellaneous Awkward Embarrassing Relationship advice Am I overreacting? Weird AITA Dating Sleep Annoying Parents Mental health Furniture Kids Gross Friends Public freakouts

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I agree, your life sucks 10

You deserved it 15

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I agree, your life sucks 9

You deserved it 11

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Today, after three and a half years of working dead-end jobs with a bachelor's degree, I got a call from a potential employer in my degree field, who wanted to set up an interview. The problem: the interview is across the country, and I'm too broke to pay the travel expenses. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 757

You deserved it 2 585

Today, I choked on a gummy bear and ended up in the emergency room. The first thing the doctor said to me was, "Well, that must have been 'beary' uncomfortable." The entire room burst into laughter. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 847

You deserved it 8 571

Today, I learned that chivalry truly is dead when a seemingly fit man pushed me into a door to get a seat on the train before me. My leg is in a cast. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 863

You deserved it 3 397

Today, I had just finished a really intense workout in my garage gym. It was chilly outside, but I crossed the road home in my shorts, as I was still pretty hot and sweaty. A woman walked by and asked, "Aren't you cold, you skinny little whore?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 044

You deserved it 272

Today, a co-worker came back from his honeymoon. He passed by my office to say hi, and mentioned, "I heard you're getting married next year?" I broke up with my boyfriend yesterday. He's taking his things out of the house as I write this. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 764

You deserved it 177

Today, I texted my college boyfriend to tell him how terrible I felt about cheating. He replied saying he was so relieved because he had been cheating on me with a girl in his dorm. I was talking about my math exam. FML

I agree, your life sucks 565

You deserved it 89

Catchy turn of phrase

Same thing different taste

No

Honesty

She definitely heard

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