Cheers
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By jace17 - 24/08/2010 08:34 - United States
By S. Fancyson - 16/04/2013 23:23 - United States
Ouch... Some "friend" you got there..
Yeah, she IS some friend. She actually cares about a friend's health and well-being.
People often mistake caring for somebody and plain insensivity/rudeness when it comes to overweight people... Sure, caring about her friend's health is good, but : 1. We don't know amything about OP's weight, they could be perfectly healthy ; 2. If OP is overweight, a birthday is still about the worst time to make someone feel bad about themselves...
If OP isn't overweight, she wouldn't be offended enough to post it on this site.
Sounds like they are being a bit heavy-handed about their message.
Give her a book on how to be a good friend.
This isn't necessarily a bad thing. I'd rather view it as "Wow, there is someone who cares about my health enough to encourage me," rather than "My friend thinks I'm fat." Getting motivated to lose weight is truly a challenge sometimes. It helps to know you're not alone in the fight.
Unless the friend has expressed that she is unhappy with her weight, then the no one has the right to tell her to change it. I'm kind of tired of people telling overweight people that they need to lose weight, even if the overweight person is perfectly happy with their body! You hardly see anyone telling thin people that they should gain weight "because I care about your health". Seriously, unless someone has said that they want to lose weight, don't ******* push them to lose weight.
I am perfectly happy with my body (as is my boyfriend who tells me I'm beautiful every day), however that doesn't mean I don't need to lose weight. There's a difference between addressing a state of appearance and addressing a health issue.
Sure, but not everyone wants health advice. Especially not on their birthday. If they're already stressed about their health, getting a book on it on their birthday isn't going to help. If the friend was really concerned, they would've brought it up and sat down with OP and brought it up in a more gentle way.
FYI, I am one of those people who are told regularly by friends and family to gain weight because of health. I am not anoroxic just slightly underweight. You can't just say "I am happy with it blbl" if it is very bad for your health. Peoplr who care about you, will be concerned. So having unhealthy weight is not only a matter of personal preferrnce, just like drug abuse, because people close to you will be concerned. Also, having healthy weight is always a good thing as it adds to your endurance and overall survivability, not only appearance, which can be a valid reason for yourself btw. OPs friend still should not have ruined his/her birthday. OP probably knows about it and if OPs friend wants to help, he could visit a gym with OP or whatever.
maybe this is a wakeup call.
No, this is Patrick.
No, this is old memes
Agreed with #5.... Sometimes there is a definite reality check needed
I was once obese, but then my family plain out said that I need to lose weight and that I'm really obese, you shouldn't sugar coat these kinds of topics.
Pun intended, #24?
maybe.
Where does it say OP is obese, unhealthy, fat, or overweight? OP could be perfectly healthy and at a reasonable weight and just have a friend who's an asshole. Unless you're a doctor, or unless someone has asked specifically for your opinion/help, keep your medical opinions to yourself.
It could be used as a substitute for firewood if you're lost in the woods...?
Look at it as encouragement. I don't think your friend is really trying to be mean but help you.
I know it might sound rude, but maybe she's just concerned for your health, as untactful as it is.
I completely agree. Sometimes it is difficult to see ones' own flaws or problems, and it is much better to hear something like that from a friend or family member than a complete stranger. I have a "friend"/coworker with terrible body odor who was in denial despite me being blunt and direct about it. His wake up call came when he interviewed for a fellowship training position, and he was dismissed during the interview because of it (in very clear terms).
Maybe they actually are worried about your health.
Read it
Keywords
Give her a book on how to be a good friend.
Sounds like they are being a bit heavy-handed about their message.