Work: Creepy crawlies

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Creepy crawlies

By xUnluckyx - 18/03/2010 05:45 - Canada

Today, I was working, ripping siding off a house. I pulled off a sheet that was over my head. I got rained with what I thought was wood chips that were behind the siding. Turns out they were dead grasshoppers. Guess what I found in my bra after work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 228

You deserved it 3 802

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Same thing different taste

Where d'you come from?

By Anonymous - 29/08/2021 23:01 - United States - Austin

Today, as someone with a large chest, I'm used to sometimes finding food in my clothes at the end of the day. However, when I took off my bra off, I found half of a dead grasshopper. FML

I agree, your life sucks 972

You deserved it 141

You were warned

By Anonymous - 20/07/2013 21:44 - United States - Austin

Today, I was removing large shrubs from a house. I heard my co-worker yell something, but I couldn't hear him, so I just pulled the stump out anyway. What I realized too late was that he was telling me that there was a swarm of bees living behind the stump. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 520

You deserved it 12 022

By Mitchellbassists - 17/04/2015 15:27 - United States - Dayton

Today, while mowing my backyard, I carelessly ran over a fire ant hill. Thousands of tiny stinging insects blowing towards you while you're wearing shorts and a t-shirt is definitely not fun. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 900

You deserved it 5 441

By Anonymous - 02/04/2012 02:25 - United States - Binghamton

Today, while mowing the lawn, I ran over a hornet's nest. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 951

You deserved it 3 441

Freakout

By benz1369 - This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff - Canada - Toronto

Today, while stocking the green beans at work, I picked up a "leaf" which turned out to be a grasshopper. I screamed so loud, my coworkers now think I'm crazy. This is only my second week here. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 427

You deserved it 1 722

By Anonymous - 14/09/2010 23:41 - United States

Today, I was chopping weeds with a weed whacker. I heard something get caught in the blades, and realized it was a frog when the leg hit me in the eye. The rest of the chopped frog ended up on my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 246

You deserved it 5 507

What do I get?

By kirassi919 - 20/09/2012 16:50 - United States - North Wales

Today, I helped my parents out by tearing down the old, rusty swing set that's been in our backyard for years. Little did I know that there was a beehive hidden in the long grass, and I now have dozens of painful red bumps all over me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 21 192

You deserved it 2 267

By buttercup92 - 31/05/2016 03:45 - United States - San Antonio

Today, while hiking, I walked face first into a spider web. Freaking out, I shook my hair out in case there was a spider. Later on in the day the spider fell from my hair into my food. FML

I agree, your life sucks 13 960

You deserved it 1 168

Invasion

By Anonymous - 26/08/2020 14:01 - United States

Today, I went to clean my roof when something buzzed by my head and a sting hit my neck. It turns out there's a small nest of, like, five hornets just chilling outside of my window. I found a dead one on the desk in my bedroom. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 254

You deserved it 129

By orilykid - 31/10/2012 17:23 - United States - Richmond

Today, I was cleaning out my roof's gutter, which was full of leaves. There was an especially big pile, and when I started scooping it up, I felt something squishy. Turns out those leaves were covering the remains of a rotting squirrel. I can't stop smelling it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 101

You deserved it 1 961

KenMcGormick 0

Thursday 18 March 2010 12:07

those are happy grasshoppers

MidgetMonster 0

Thursday 18 March 2010 12:09

that is disgusting. how did you not feel the dead lumps of grasshopper in your bra?

Comments

zachjack 0

Sunday 18 July 2010 22:34

a boob!

profnutty 0

Saturday 9 October 2010 7:48

I'm supposing u found cheese?? :D

stixxzor 0

Friday 12 November 2010 23:00

Amen

DeannaBo_fml 0

Thursday 10 March 2011 13:10

Eww nastyy

woody768 0

Friday 29 July 2011 8:16

boobs? =D

newmandotcom 6

Thursday 6 October 2011 10:13

Hopefully you have small boobs. That way fewer bugs will be in there. But shouldn't you expect that kind of stuff when doing that? YDI

condango 0

Wednesday 23 May 2012 0:04

A girl who does manual labor is hot

kewlkate 9

Sunday 1 July 2012 4:14

Jelly beans? Please tell me you found Jelly beans in your bra! Otherwise, I totally didn't understand this FML... :/

yenidewi 11

Sunday 28 October 2012 14:29

cockroach ??

insomniac8400 13

Wednesday 16 January 2013 15:58

Boobs?

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The Top

Today, my girlfriend keeps asking me to get her name tattooed on my chest. At first I thought she wanted a romantic gesture, but now she asks me to do it so often, it’s starting to feel more like she wants to cattle brand me as my owner. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 404

You deserved it 163

Today, I told my parents I wanted to try modelling. I thought that since I have such a low self-esteem, that it might benefit me, and make me feel better about myself and how I look. The first thing out of my dad's mouth was, "What? Why? You're ugly." Thanks dad. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 218

You deserved it 7 497

The Top

Today, I was going to have sex with my boyfriend for the first time. He couldn't get hard and pouted about it for nearly two hours. When I went to comfort him, he said, "Man, I hope I'm not gay." FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 445

You deserved it 2 468

Today, I was playing with my dog, when she started sniffing my face. Jokingly, I got up and started to sniff her face back and asked "Yeah, how do you like that?" She replied by biting into my face. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 370

You deserved it 35 765

Today, I found maggots in the ketchup on my sausage. Too bad I had already eaten half of it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 921

You deserved it 253

Today, my brother and his girlfriend got married. I got a pretty bad pimple on my nose not long before, and I'd tried to pop it. It turned into a really bad scab instead, so I put makeup on it. I didn't notice until after the wedding that the makeup made the scab look badly infected. FML

I agree, your life sucks 839

You deserved it 194

Today, my fiancé admitted to me that he only found big girls attractive, and that's why he could never cheat on me with my friends. FML

I agree, your life sucks 40 581

You deserved it 6 935

Today, as usual, my cat was sleeping on my stomach. I couldn't fall asleep so I delicately picked him up and put him down next to me. He got up, hopped back onto me, gave me a paw slap, then went back to sleep on my stomach. I didn't dare move all night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 735

You deserved it 15 851