Intimacy, Sex, Creepy and Work: Creepypasta

Creepypasta

By QuinnyZebrass - 02/04/2013 04:11 - United States - Laveen

Today, my creepy co-worker walked up and said, "You know, I was having sex with this girl last night, and I almost said your name." FML

I agree, your life sucks 48 879

You deserved it 3 426

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Same thing different taste

Gross

By Teeny - 05/05/2018 05:00

Today, my creepy co-worker informed me that he was going to stick his "peeny-weeny" in my "teeny-vageeny". FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 030

You deserved it 400

By workhoe - 20/02/2017 06:00 - United States

Today, I had sex with a coworker I've had my eye on for awhile. Immediately after, he turned on the light and got on his phone. Me, trying to start a conversation, I said, "Well, that was fun." He looked at me and said, "Was it?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 8 006

You deserved it 1 760

By Neveragain - 01/07/2013 05:49 - United States - Tampa

Today, while at work, a creepy guy blatantly stared at my chest for a good 40 seconds. Finally snapping out of his trance, he said with a wink, "You forgot your name tag." He was right. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 098

You deserved it 5 423

Sooooooo?

By Anonymous - 23/03/2009 06:43 - Canada

Today, when I walked into work all of my co-workers were giggling and asking "How was YOUR night last night?". Last night I had sex for the first time with someone I'm seeing secretly (with good reason). That person is my boss. He told everyone. FML

I agree, your life sucks 73 440

You deserved it 30 842

Freudian slip

By Anonymous - 04/03/2024 13:00 - United States - Rolling Meadows

Today, during sex, my (now ex) boyfriend called out the name of the new female coworker that he told me just last night "not to worry about." He's known her for a week. We were together for 8 and a half years. FML

I agree, your life sucks 498

You deserved it 139

Creep

By Anonymous - 06/08/2019 04:00

Today, I found out that the guy I've been anonymously sexting with through an adult website is the seriously creepy stalker-ish front desk worker from our office building, who also happens to be the building owner's son. Shit. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 398

You deserved it 1 999

Who am I?

By Anonymous - 21/06/2016 01:59 - United States - Fulton

Today, I might have ruined my co-worker's relationship with her fiancé, with whom I share a name, because we "work together too often" and now he doesn't know whose name she's saying during sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 296

You deserved it 1 107

By Chubby - 17/11/2011 16:50 - United States

Today, I told my boss about a coworker that had been hitting on me. She looked me dead in the eye and said "I was afraid that would happen. He's a bit of a chubby chaser." FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 216

You deserved it 5 182

What a cad!

By the2girls - 09/08/2011 16:08 - Canada

Today, I was walking to get ice-cream with my boyfriend. When we were ordering our cone, the girl who was scooping it said to my boyfriend, "Hey I know you! You're the one who slept with my sister-in-law the other night." FML

I agree, your life sucks 56 262

You deserved it 5 229

By Mdrk783 - 02/09/2009 08:41 - United States

Today, I was hanging out with a co-worker who I really liked. One thing led to another and we ended up going to her house and hooked up. Once we'd finished, I noticed another co-workers ID on the floor by her bed. I asked her about it and she said he must have dropped it there last night. FML

I agree, your life sucks 24 669

You deserved it 8 874

BigMatt803 18

Tuesday 2 April 2013 12:14

Kinda makes you wonder how he gets laid being such a creep

Sillydeadperson 17

Tuesday 2 April 2013 12:15

Jesus, what a creep. I hope you reported this to your higher-up!

Comments

Jacksparrow72 21

Tuesday 2 April 2013 16:59

Sexual Harassment!

Bunny21 11

Tuesday 2 April 2013 17:43

Time for a restraining order!!!!!!!

Kelishas 9

Tuesday 2 April 2013 18:04

Hello Sexual Harassment. I hope you spoke to your mutual boss about it

nerdsgetmehot 22

Tuesday 2 April 2013 18:47

I think that was his super awkward way of trying to seduce you. I'm guessing it didn't work.

amifaiyaz 12

Wednesday 3 April 2013 2:04

With that demeanor, he was more likely having sex with a blow up doll than a real person.

Megan639 16

Wednesday 3 April 2013 2:26

That sort of thing just happens to me all the time. I don't know why all the stalkers like me so much...

whY402Jay 12

Wednesday 3 April 2013 4:53

That's a crime.

Drewx77 11

Wednesday 3 April 2013 5:26

Well I'm sure you felt abit awkward and creeped out?

ceenguyenx 6

Wednesday 3 April 2013 6:52

That's freaky, maybe your take the situation further to your boss.

cdkitty94 6

Wednesday 3 April 2013 7:18

So beyond gross and wrong... Can you say about face to the boss, report filed for inappropriate behavior in the workplace!

Keywords

Miscellaneous Family Cats DIY Poopoo peepee Work Awkward Management Frustration Am I overreacting? Capitalism Relatable Coworkers Transportation ADHD Dogs Animals Dating Love Mental health Health Anxiety Technology Sleep Noise Roommate Clumsy AITA Confused Parents

The Top

Today, I tried reaching out to a brand on Instagram, telling them I'm a rising influencer and would love a free sample of some of their products to review. They replied back with a laughing emoji and "You have 44 followers. Eat shit." Then they posted it on their story, with my name listed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 86

You deserved it 1 384

Today, my boyfriend of a year told me he is at the point in his life where he is ready to start a family, get married and have a baby. He also casually stated that he wished he could meet someone he could see himself settling down with. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 332

You deserved it 4 254

The Top

Today, I just got a new assignment for the moving company I work for. Two weeks ago my fiancé dumped me and I moved out of the house. Almost all of the furniture was mine and it took forever. The new moving assignment I have is moving her new boyfriend into my old house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 50 359

You deserved it 2 817

Today, I tried to fix my wife's brakes and change her oil before I worked on my truck. Seven hours later both vehicles are unusable. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 470

You deserved it 5 878

Today, I found out that my father faked his whole "mid-life crisis", just so he could gain my trust and get me to admit that I smoke weed, and to tell him who I buy it from. Hello year-long grounding. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 747

You deserved it 43 598

Today, I was breaking into a house when three police cruisers pulled up. They ran my social, my license plates, and asked me twenty minutes worth of questions, before allowing me to go back to work. I work as a locksmith; the homeowner had lost their keys. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 443

You deserved it 3 785

Today, after a nice Thanksgiving with my parents, and the usual question about when I'll bring a woman with me to meet them, I absentmindedly launched the usual dating app. I swiped completely dry with no matches, reminding myself that my entire city doesn't have one person interested in dating me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 746

You deserved it 1 098

Today, following the advice of not putting my wallet in my back pocket, I put my wallet in my jacket's chest pocket. I lost my jacket. FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 556

You deserved it 1 516