Intimacy, Sex and Party: Did I ever? - FML

FML for mobile
Free

Open in app

Did I ever?

By Anonymous - 27/04/2025 19:00 - United Kingdom

Spicy

Today, I’d never felt like a ho before, until I was at a party where someone decided we needed to play 'Never Have I Ever', and I’d done everything sexual that people were coming up with. I actually felt disgusted at myself. I might need Jesus. FML

I agree, your life sucks 143

You deserved it 362

World Environment Day : Green and Vaudevilles
Stories where love for the planet meets situations that are as green as they are funny! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By silverspud - 13/06/2015 01:22 - United States - Grand Junction

Spicy

Today, I was invited to an adult toy party with co-workers. They started by playing a game called 'Never Ever Have I Ever' about everyone's sexual exploits. My mother is a co-worker. I can never un-hear what I heard. FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 403

You deserved it 7 349

By skeletor - 18/02/2009 03:22 - United States

Spicy

Today, my group of friends, my girlfriend, and I were playing "Never have I ever." My girlfriend's turn came up and she went with, "Never have I ever had an orgasm." FML

I agree, your life sucks 67 067

You deserved it 21 521

Spread the word

By JAY22 - 26/03/2009 11:41 - United States

Spicy

Today, this girl and I were chilling in my apartment. Things got heated up and we started making out. One thing lead to another, and the next thing I knew, she was giving me head. I was getting ready to bust when she stopped, looked up into my eyes and said, "Do you believe in Jesus?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 224 204

You deserved it 35 824

Humblebrag

By Anonymous - 05/11/2024 19:00 - United Kingdom

Spicy

Today, my wife is upset because at a party we took part in an X-rated 'Never Have I Ever', which exposed how filthy I was with past girlfriends, and how boring our sex life is. I’d done almost everything, while she, who’s only ever been with me, had only done 5 things off the list of about 40. FML

I agree, your life sucks 362

You deserved it 299

Proportional response

By Sav - 04/02/2023 16:00

Spicy

Today, after I hooked up with a guy the other night and we had lots of fun, (or so I thought), I woke up to a text saying, “I feel worthless and disgusting after having sex.” He said he was a virgin and he’s a Christian. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 043

You deserved it 252

By Travolta - 14/08/2011 04:50 - United Kingdom

Today, I went to a party. I tried dancing in public for the first time ever. Judging by the whispers, stares, and giggles, I'm never doing it again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 690

You deserved it 5 200

By Anonymous - 12/02/2013 23:01 - United States

Today, I got my very first yeast infection. Thinking she would help me, I went to my mom. Instead she began yelling about how I'm lying and it's an STD and I don't believe in the power of Jesus. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 936

You deserved it 3 040

By ShitFaced - 01/03/2012 11:35 - United States

Spicy

Today, I realized I've never had sex with someone who was sober at the time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 103

You deserved it 21 626

Dancing With The Stares

By Travolta - 20/05/2019 02:13

Today, I was at a party and I danced. Judging by people's stares, I should never ever attempt it again. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 663

You deserved it 310

By Ben - 25/01/2010 03:31 - United States

Today, I was talking this pretty religious girl that I like. We were playing a game and I asked her if she could go back in history and meet anyone who would it be. She said Jesus. Without thinking I said "I mean someone that was real." FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 294

You deserved it 47 730

Next

Top comments

JIMMY2CHAINZ_84 2

Sunday 27 April 2025 22:23

maybe you’re more open minded to sexual thing than the people you were with.

GoogieWithers 23

Monday 28 April 2025 0:41

Maybe you are more adventurous than those at the party? You are not a ho!

Comments

smoochmysnoot 5

Sunday 27 April 2025 21:26

Maybe you’re not a ho at all, just hung out with a bunch of prudes.

JIMMY2CHAINZ_84 2

Sunday 27 April 2025 22:23

maybe you’re more open minded to sexual thing than the people you were with.

GoogieWithers 23

Monday 28 April 2025 0:41

Maybe you are more adventurous than those at the party? You are not a ho!

TomeDr 24

Monday 28 April 2025 12:59

You can’t go wrong with Jesus.

roryab 8

Monday 28 April 2025 22:54

lol, I can't with people with cat profile pics with opposing opinions.🤣

FML on Facebook

Keywords

Animals Cats My ex Transportation Awkward Vacation Family Annoying Miscellaneous Relatable Accident Pregnancy Health Insects Dogs Skincare Work Love Intimacy Sex AITA #FAFO Social Media Kids Babysitter Technology Dating Embarrassing Geek Poopoo peepee

The Top

Today, I was feeling a little naughty, so I put on a sexy outfit, laid down on the hood of my boyfriend's car, and waited for him to find me. When he came into the garage and saw me, he freaked out and bitched at me, because I "could've dented the chassis." FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 614

You deserved it 16 585

Today, two days into our honeymoon, my mother-in-law turned up at our Spa hotel and pretended it was a huge coincidence. We are an 8-hour flight away, yet she tried to claim she had a Spa coupon about to expire, from another country. Nice try Linda you nosy, interfering bitch. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 279

You deserved it 92

The Top

Today, I caught my new neighbor sticking his knob inside my car and pissing on my seats. His reason? I parked in his spot. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 422

You deserved it 8 073

Today, while my husband and I were having sex, my cat decided to join in on our moans by crying at the door the entire time. He stopped as soon as we finished. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 061

You deserved it 4 736

Today, my best friend, who I hadn’t seen since last year, picked me up and we got to talking about our memories together. I brought up the time we both cheated on our girlfriends at a Red Hot Chilli Peppers concert. Little did I know his girlfriend was waiting in the back of the car to scare me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 189

You deserved it 904

Today, I woke up to a warm bed, the morning sunlight bathing my face, and my boyfriend sneaking my credit card out of my purse. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 069

You deserved it 4 083

Today, my ex-boyfriend asked how long he'd have to wait until he could ask out my best friend. We broke up yesterday. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 569

You deserved it 3 236

Today, I was making out with my boyfriend, when the Taco Bell I'd eaten for lunch came back up for round two. Undigested rice and beans got stuck in his hair. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 148

You deserved it 7 746