Intimacy, Sex and Awkward: Humblebrag - FML

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Humblebrag

By Anonymous - 05/11/2024 19:00 - United Kingdom

Spicy

Today, my wife is upset because at a party we took part in an X-rated 'Never Have I Ever', which exposed how filthy I was with past girlfriends, and how boring our sex life is. I’d done almost everything, while she, who’s only ever been with me, had only done 5 things off the list of about 40. FML

I agree, your life sucks 346

You deserved it 283

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Same thing different taste

Alexa, play "Boredom" by Buzzcocks

By Anonymous - 24/12/2021 05:01

Spicy

Today, I had to have the awkward conversation with my wife of 20-plus years that the reason I’ve lost interest in sex is because our sex life has been mind numbingly boring for at least 15 of those years, always the same positions, never wanting to try anything new, just so boring. FML

I agree, your life sucks 930

You deserved it 1 438

Who's been a naughty girl?

By one cock too many - 04/08/2020 05:02

Spicy

Today, I found out I’m the guy whose wife made adult films in college. Although embarrassed, I thought I may be able to get past it. Except for the fact that we dated in college, and she insisted we wait until after we were married to have sex. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 862

You deserved it 387

Tempted?

By Anonymous - 23/10/2023 00:02

Spicy

Today, I found out that my prude wife, who has given up on anything remotely sexually exciting, has been researching swinger clubs. I found out when she “accidentally” texted me a Vice article on the subject. FML

I agree, your life sucks 551

You deserved it 156

By skeletor - 18/02/2009 03:22 - United States

Spicy

Today, my group of friends, my girlfriend, and I were playing "Never have I ever." My girlfriend's turn came up and she went with, "Never have I ever had an orgasm." FML

I agree, your life sucks 67 065

You deserved it 21 518

What about me?

By crushed - 23/05/2020 02:00

Today, my wife told me about an old boyfriend she had. She told me that they used to fool around, and that she’d give him blow jobs all the time. I never get any action like that from her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 785

You deserved it 265

Stuck in a rut

By Anonymous - 16/04/2020 20:00

Spicy

Today, I realised my wife has been slowly phasing out most elements of our previously active and inventive sex life. These days, it's missionary once a month or she tells me to whack one off by myself in the bathroom. When did we get so boring? FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 134

You deserved it 340

By Anonymous - 15/06/2014 19:22 - United Kingdom

Spicy

Today, I found out that my wife has had more sex in the last two months than I have in our last year of marriage. FML

I agree, your life sucks 67 111

You deserved it 6 386

How very dare you?

By Anonymous - 04/05/2021 02:01

Spicy

Today, I caught my wife trying to give herself oral sex. It was sexy and also kinda funny, so I offered to do it to her properly. She got explosively mad for some reason and actually threw me out. I’m writing this from my brother's spare room, wondering where I went wrong. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 791

You deserved it 364

Creepy thing to do, for sure

By Anonymous - 11/12/2023 16:00 - Canada - Toronto

Spicy

Today, my wife told me she wanted to try something that would turn me on immediately. While I was in our bed, she came in, wearing only the underwear she took from our 13 year-old daughter's closet. Now she doesn't understand why I'm genuinely disgusted and don't want to have sex with her. FML

I agree, your life sucks 728

You deserved it 160

Permission granted and rejected

By Anonymous - 28/09/2023 04:00

Spicy

Today, my wife lost interest in sex a long time ago. I’ve tried to reignite her interest lately, which culminated in an argument where she gave me permission to go out and shag other women. We might as well divorce at this point if she’s going to say things like that. FML

I agree, your life sucks 681

You deserved it 128

Next

Top comments

Chazzster 28

Tuesday 5 November 2024 20:45

Some party games are just a bad idea…

Thaylok 17

Thursday 7 November 2024 2:22

oR... you can pull the handcuffs and leather out of the drawer and help her have some fun.

Comments

Chazzster 28

Tuesday 5 November 2024 20:45

Some party games are just a bad idea…

kltkiara 6

Wednesday 6 November 2024 0:17

Sounds like she needs a hall pass since you’re holding out on her

kltkiara 6

Wednesday 6 November 2024 0:18

Sounds like she needs a hall pass since you’re holding out on her

Thaylok 17

Thursday 7 November 2024 2:22

oR... you can pull the handcuffs and leather out of the drawer and help her have some fun.

TXdude4503 2

Sunday 19 January 2025 13:29

not your fault she’s boring in bed

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I agree, your life sucks 54 056

You deserved it 12 711

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I agree, your life sucks 944

You deserved it 74

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I agree, your life sucks 409

You deserved it 179