Love, Sex and Frustration: DIY

DIY

By Anonymous - 14/01/2023 20:00 - United States - Freeland

Today, thinking maybe she could spare 5 minutes of her time and requires no work at all, I asked my wife for a handjob. She said no and told me I can “do it yourself.” FML

I agree, your life sucks 463

You deserved it 1 427

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Same thing different taste

Stop begging

By cuckolddreams - 21/01/2015 19:06 - United States - Broken Bow

Today, while begging my wife for sex for once, she told me she didn't have time. I said it wouldn't take long. She said, "I know." FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 289

You deserved it 11 750

By Korisite - 30/10/2011 05:31 - United States

Today, my wife caught me masturbating to porn. She screamed at me and asked why I would be masturbating when I had her to have sex with. So I asked if she wanted to have sex, she said no. FML

I agree, your life sucks 46 259

You deserved it 25 002

Self-service

By Steve - 13/06/2012 21:30 - United States - Lake Charles

Today, I walked in on my wife masturbating. Naturally, I asked her if she needed some help. She replied, "Nah, I've got this." FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 810

You deserved it 17 109

Quickie

By Anonymous - 17/02/2023 02:00

Today, it's been exactly one year since I’ve had sex, and even that was because my wife caught me masturbating and helped me out with a zero effort handjob that was over in 15 seconds, since I’d already done 90% of the work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 954

You deserved it 278

By Anonymous - 03/07/2013 16:25 - United States - Iowa City

Today, I was on a movie date with my boyfriend, when he asked for a handjob. I thought I was doing well until he sighed, took my hand off, and said he could finish on his own. FML

I agree, your life sucks 58 715

You deserved it 18 644

Caught in 4K

By ScrewU - 17/08/2022 19:59 - United States

Today, I got off early from work to catch my wife screwing her co-worker in our bed. I ask her what I did to deserve this. She told me she was “lonely” and that he “always makes her feel like a woman,” unlike me. She would come home from work and I would initiate intimacy, but she would decline every time. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 881

You deserved it 156

Let's get it on

By Frank - 17/08/2011 06:50 - United States

Today, I came home from work tired and horny, and asked my girlfriend if she wanted to go make love. While all she had done all day is lay on the couch and watch television, she said, "I'm too tired, why don't you just go into the bathroom and grab a quick wank." FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 053

You deserved it 6 454

By Anonymous - 07/06/2015 07:54 - United States - Wheatland

Today, I tried talking to my wife about our sexless marriage. Her only response was to toss me a sock and say "Knock yourself out, fuckstick." FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 751

You deserved it 4 412

By Username - 18/03/2010 08:21 - France

Today, my wife told me she was very horny as we have not had sex in about two weeks, so I told her to do something for me to get me in the mood. She sighed and then went upstairs to get ready for work. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 578

You deserved it 49 782

By Anonn - 23/02/2009 13:14 - Australia

Today, I accidentally walked in on my girlfriend masturbating so I said to her, "Need a hand with that?" to which she replied "I'm doing fine here on my own, don't ruin it." FML

I agree, your life sucks 93 163

You deserved it 23 485

RichardPencil 30

Sunday 15 January 2023 4:56

What kind of handjob takes no work? A lot of effort on her part and no payoff for her. It's the most bullshit of the sex moves, if it even counts as sex.

Nikki 17

Sunday 15 January 2023 3:59

Well, at least it will only take you 5 minutes and no work at all

Comments

JackWood 20

Sunday 15 January 2023 2:49

You shouldn't be so romantic. js

Hangryko 29

Sunday 15 January 2023 2:56

Wow, how did that not put her in the mood? *facepalm*

Nikki 17

Sunday 15 January 2023 3:59

Well, at least it will only take you 5 minutes and no work at all

RichardPencil 30

Sunday 15 January 2023 4:56

What kind of handjob takes no work? A lot of effort on her part and no payoff for her. It's the most bullshit of the sex moves, if it even counts as sex.

anothergenericuncreativename 13

Sunday 15 January 2023 9:54

what are you complaining about - that she exercises her right to say no?

Iamthebanzai22 21

Sunday 15 January 2023 10:35

Yeah.... Son, I'm only gonna say this one time: You don't ask for sex. You seduce for it.

D J's MOM 17

Sunday 15 January 2023 14:45

wow.... such a romantic. she gets all the work and mess and you get to sit back and reap the benefits. I wonder why she said no? p.s. You're a Moron ydi

BurnInDemonFire 34

Sunday 15 January 2023 17:28

Everyone in the comments agrees with your wife. Go **** yourself.

mcsmee 7

Monday 16 January 2023 15:11

Thanks for posting this. I showed it to my significant other last night, and this morning she woke me up with a handjob that included lots of massaging of the scrotum. She even played with my prostate, then insisted that I finish on her face..