Embarrassing, Vacation, Awkward and beach: Don't ass-u-me

Don't ass-u-me

By yoyo22 - 05/12/2009 21:04 - United States

Today, I was at the beach with my friend on vacation. We were playing Marco Polo in the ocean and I was Marco. I thought I heard my friend, so I lunged forward and grabbed her. Too bad it wasn't my friend, it was an old guy in a pink speedo, and I grabbed his butt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 992

You deserved it 9 431

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Snuggle up and laugh with our winter stories, where snow isn't the only thing sliding around! More…

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Same thing different taste

By klutz - 10/08/2009 14:34 - United States

Today, me and my friend were following this hot lifeguard around a waterpark. In the wave pool, I decided to be cute and "accidentally" bump into him during the waves to start a conversation. As I prepared to do this, a large wave pushed me off my feet and I fell face-first into his butt. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 855

You deserved it 56 839

By beachbum - 27/02/2009 06:03 - United States

Today, I was at the beach with my buddy. Messing around, he swam up behind me and dunked me under the water. Naturally, moments later I swam behind him, grabbed both his ankles and stood up, flipping him completely, only to see him watching me from a few feet away. I flipped a 70 year old man. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 452

You deserved it 54 153

By paymeinhugs - 17/03/2009 01:04 - United States

Today, I was swimming in the ocean with my best friend and a giant wave came and knocked off the bottom of my bikini. My friend told me that she would go get another bottom so I could walk onto the very crowded beach. She left me for half an hour, laughing from the shore with her entire family. FML

I agree, your life sucks 89 532

You deserved it 6 347

By anonymous - 30/07/2014 02:36 - United States - Williamsburg

Today, I was at the beach with a group of friends, including the guy I like. As soon as we got to the beach, I ran toward the water and he chased after me. It was a beautiful moment until I looked back at him, tripped, fell on my face and slid down the beach. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 030

You deserved it 7 475

This is fine

By Anonymous - 09/06/2012 02:36 - United Kingdom - London

Today, at the beach, my boyfriend picked me up and carried me over his shoulder. I felt my bikini top come undone in the process. I panicked and pulled down on his shorts. We were fined for indecent exposure. FML

I agree, your life sucks 26 660

You deserved it 10 375

Public freakout time

By camzzz - 02/07/2011 08:27 - United States

Today, my girlfriend and I were walking around when she got lost in a crowd. And me, being a pig, playfully grabbed her butt. I realized it wasn't hers when the guy whose butt I'd grabbed by accident knocked me unconscious. FML

I agree, your life sucks 12 196

You deserved it 47 793

By loser. - 20/03/2010 06:23 - Canada

Today, I dove into the water perfectly, and my bikini bottoms came off. I splashed around nervously. This guy must have thought I was drowning, and dove in to save me. He emerged from the water carrying a half naked girl. FML

I agree, your life sucks 33 611

You deserved it 5 502

By babydoll13211 - 04/09/2009 21:36 - United States

Today, I was at a friend's pool party. He lives on a lake and one of our friends wouldn't get in the water. My best friend and I decided to push him off the dock. Once we had, I turned to see my crush who had watched looked shocked, then said, "You know he can't swim right?" FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 318

You deserved it 66 307

Hey guys!

By iannie - 31/07/2011 21:45 - United States

Today, I went to the beach. While I was swimming, I noticed a few really hot guys passing. Trying to be sexy, I slowly got out of the water, showing off my body. I showed a bit more than I expected when I realized my bikini bottom had fallen off. FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 392

You deserved it 39 513

By Username - 05/06/2019 20:00

Today, at the beach, I swam pretty far out into the ocean. I ended up getting pummelled by the waves and got a painful cramp in my leg. The whole beach watched me flail and scream, while my friends rolled their eyes as they dragged me out of the water. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 450

You deserved it 930

ItsAshxD 0

Sunday 6 December 2009 1:48

Priceless.

lifeinoz 0

Sunday 6 December 2009 2:10

Who the hell plays Marco Polo in the freakin ocean? YDI!

Comments

lebrockshard 10

Sunday 6 December 2009 2:26

This FML has been done before... almost the same, except that maybe he ended up drowning the old man instead of just grabbing him! OP if u want to make up a story that's fine, but try not to copy it from other people!

chuji 1

Sunday 6 December 2009 2:27

"I saw a bunch of young kids playing marco polo. I nonchalantly moved in and fooled one of them to grab my ass. IMMD!" (just made this up to be creepy, bahaha!)

grrrarrrg2 2

Sunday 6 December 2009 2:32

YDI for playing Marco Polo when there are other people around close enough to get in the way of the game.

BaghdadAssUp 0

Sunday 6 December 2009 2:37

Isn't it ridiculously cold to be in the ocean right now regardless if you're near the equator? I'm afraid to leave the house because it's so freaking cold.

Teecuppit3a 0

Sunday 6 December 2009 3:36

Beaches in California are freezing no matter what time of year it is. You learn to deal.

happi_pineapple 0

Sunday 6 December 2009 7:34

No they aren't. In the summer, they're cold but swimmable. In the winter, the water gets down to the 50s and no one touches it. OP totally deserved it for going to the beach during the winter.