Weird, Awkward, Babysitter and Kids: Early learner - FML

Early learner

By Michele - 18/01/2010 00:32 - United States

Spicy

Today, while babysitting a six year-old boy, he asked me if I could show him my "boobies." I said no, that wouldn't be very appropriate. Suddenly, he pulled down his undies and pointed at his package while exclaiming, "Look, my penis is on again!" It was pointing RIGHT at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 608

You deserved it 4 057

When Christmas Ends Badly…
Rather than debating politics with Uncle Roger for the umpteenth time, share the best Christmas FMLs to finally have a good family meal! More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By joe - 23/06/2013 23:36 - United States - Easton

Today, I was teasing my 6-year-old sister about having a boyfriend. I asked her, "Did he take his shirt off?" She promptly said no. A few minutes later, she said, "But he did take his pants off." I then asked why. She said, "To show me his penis." FML

I agree, your life sucks 59 696

You deserved it 8 616

But he's only 5

By Anonymous - 18/12/2019 05:00

Today, I was playing with my 5 year-old neighbor. I was changing and he saw me naked. Then he went home and his parents came over. Apparently, he told them that I have beautiful boobs. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 762

You deserved it 727

Not now, Sweetie

By Redbeard - 24/01/2020 05:00

Today, while we had my husband's boss over, my 3-year-old son decided to burst into the living room naked and yell, "Mum, look! Penis!" and wiggle it around. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 190

You deserved it 369

By Embarressed... - 04/08/2010 10:25 - United Kingdom

Spicy

Today, I was babysitting for my mum's friend. I put her little boy on my knee, and he kept pulling at my top. I asked him "are you hungry?" He replied "No, I want to see your titties." FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 595

You deserved it 11 341

By sarah6786 - 22/01/2013 02:27 - United States - Schenectady

Spicy

Today, my husband asked me to show him my boob. I began to pull the side of my shirt down when he said, "No, not that one, the big one." FML

I agree, your life sucks 47 716

You deserved it 4 864

By Anonymous - 03/07/2015 20:51 - United States

Today, I had to profusely apologize to a woman after my six year old son decided to crawl between her legs at the supermarket, then look up her skirt and loudly ask why she didn't have any panties on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 109

You deserved it 4 035

By sammy18f - 24/02/2015 03:46 - United States - Brentwood

Spicy

Today, a man asked me for directions outside of a local store. After about five minutes into the conversation, I noticed he had whipped his penis out and was stroking it. He then asked me if I liked what I saw. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 117

You deserved it 3 784

By SadDad - 06/03/2009 01:51 - United States

Today, in a very crowded public restroom at a sporting arena, after looking to the man using the urinal to his right, my 6 year old son turns to address me on his left and exclaims, "Daddy, that man's wiener is a lot bigger than yours!" The whole bathroom heard and looked immediately at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 72 318

You deserved it 4 358

Caught in 4K

By Oops - 03/01/2016 19:09 - United States - San Francisco

Spicy

Today, I was at my boyfriend's house. I wanted to tease him, so I got his attention and made my orgasm face when I thought no one was looking. His thirteen year-old cousin saw and now bursts out laughing whenever he sees me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 16 297

You deserved it 19 582

By Anonymous - 11/02/2010 13:33 - United States

Today, I was babysitting. The kid said he had to use the bathroom. When I told him to go ahead, he said he just did. He was on my lap. He wasn't wearing pants. FML

I agree, your life sucks 27 534

You deserved it 7 926

Next

Top comments

theman34 0

Monday 18 January 2010 9:29

damm WTF

Radi0Waves 0

Monday 18 January 2010 9:47

That kid already has so much more game than me.

Comments

coolsteve 0

Monday 18 January 2010 14:45

That kid is a ******* hero

zom_fml 10

Monday 18 January 2010 15:14

Creepiest kid ever?

Anteezy 7

Monday 18 January 2010 15:28

Future **** star.

DutchCourage 0

Monday 18 January 2010 15:42

Are you baby sitting Ron Jeremy Jr. by any chance?

ily1210 10

Monday 18 January 2010 22:50

OMFGGG that made my dayyyy roflmao!!

KishiSenmatsu 0

Monday 18 January 2010 16:02

o.o wow…

snowman427 0

Monday 18 January 2010 16:08

that's funny but gross. at least you know he likes girls. I bet he will get laid at 10 or 11

lusitania_fml 11

Friday 28 March 2014 19:47

Wtf is wrong with you?

Newbie21 1

Monday 18 January 2010 16:17

gross FYL

Yooh_Plus_Meh 0

Monday 18 January 2010 16:21

...This is so gross/fake. Idunno.. Seems kinda out there.

PyroDeath19 0

Monday 18 January 2010 16:23

that kids a pimp

Buckeyehead 0

Monday 18 January 2010 16:28

lil bastard was horny

3
4
5
6
7
8
9
10
11
12

Keywords

Money Health Kids Christmas You're fired Work Bodyshaming Customers Fat Facebook Love Am I overreacting? Social Media AITA Embarrassing Poopoo peepee Miscellaneous Technology Education Relatable Students Mental health Romantic Break-ups Annoying Gross Argument Ironic Awkward Friends

The Top

Today, I was jogging in the neighborhood. My new neighbor who lives three houses down clotheslines me and shouts, "You're the reason my wife won't have sex with me!" He then kicked me in the stomach and walked inside. Now I'm scared to leave my house. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 664

You deserved it 3 777

Today, I have an HR meeting to discuss my team's performance. This is the same HR that refuses to hire more people because my department is full. The same HR that complains when tasks are completed late due to the team being overworked, yet refuses to take any suggestions. How do you give feedback to people like this? FML

I agree, your life sucks 450

You deserved it 75

The Top

Today, I was accidentally tagged in a photo of a group of people by a 'friend' on Facebook. She later corrected it, apparently everyone had already seen the tag and decided that the comment box below was a great opportunity to discuss how none of them would ever be caught dead hanging out with me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 692

You deserved it 3 925

Today, I got a new washer and dryer set. It's sad when all you have to do at night is make popcorn and watch the clothes washing. I even invited friends over. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 343

You deserved it 309

Today, I told a girl that I liked her. She replied, "Don't." FML

I agree, your life sucks 62 108

You deserved it 5 887

Today, my friend was complaining about about her new boyfriend. Playing around, I told her that he sounded a lot like my ex. He is. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 722

You deserved it 2 349

Today, I went for a run. I ended up being tackled by two cops, handcuffed, and dragged to the station with no explanation. Turns out a house nearby had been robbed and the best description they got was, "A man running." I didn't even get an apology. FML

I agree, your life sucks 63 403

You deserved it 2 849

Today, I found a banana peel on the clean floor. My 4-year-old son said that he was playing Spider-Man and trying to slip. I picked it up and while walking to the kitchen garbage can, slipped on the actual banana. I slid across the kitchen floor, fell, and bruised my tailbone. He laughed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 961

You deserved it 177