Intimacy: Freedom

Freedom

By Lovejunkie - 01/03/2010 07:30 - United States

Today, after finalizing my divorce, I decided to go out with a guy I had been ogling for months, after much anticipation and a few rounds of drinks at the bar, I was ready to roll. Much to my disappointment, his penis was so small the condom wouldn't stay on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 28 732

You deserved it 8 664

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Same thing different taste

By stillkindahorny - 13/09/2011 05:51 - United States

Today, I finally had sex with the guy I've been seeing. It took him longer to put the condom on than it did to finish. FML

I agree, your life sucks 37 807

You deserved it 4 729

Small guy

By no luck chuck - 09/10/2021 02:00 - United States

Today, I knew I was a small guy and finally about to get laid for the first time in years. Everything was going great, until she got my pants off. She stared at it, stared at me, stared back at it and said, "Yeah, that’s not gonna happen." Got dressed and left. Sadly this has happened many times. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 908

You deserved it 225

By Username - 16/04/2011 08:39 - United States

Today, I went on my first official date I've been on since my divorce. Things were going great until he ordered his fourth 32oz beer; he got hammered and became a horny octopus. Oh, and he farted whiled trying to give me a goodnight kiss. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 933

You deserved it 4 700

By Ummm - 03/08/2016 19:45 - United States - Wheaton

Today, I was on a second date with a guy. Things got a little handsy and he pulled down his pants to reveal a micro-penis. He then smiled and asked me to be his girlfriend. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 171

You deserved it 2 901

Quickshot

By anon - 31/08/2014 15:14 - United States

Today, while finally about to make love with my long-term boyfriend, he came from putting a condom on. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 410

You deserved it 6 032

Tiny Tim

By hmmmm - 13/08/2012 12:19 - Australia

Today, the condom slipped off, because my boyfriend refuses to admit that he needs to use smaller condoms. FML

I agree, your life sucks 41 339

You deserved it 5 481

Let down

By Anonymous - 23/12/2021 17:01 - United States

Today, I visited a friend out of state. We've been flirting for months and decided to fool around at night. He was very loving and attentive, but... he'd bragged about his dick being 6 inches and it ended up being not only thin, but very short. So thin and short that I couldn't really feel it. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 521

You deserved it 379

Is that it?

By Better not - 24/01/2018 20:00 - United States - Kenai

Today, while on vacation with my boyfriend, I decided it would be a good time to try getting intimate with him for the first time. It turns out his penis is so small that I get more enjoyment from a tampon applicator. We're stuck in this cabin for another five days. FML

I agree, your life sucks 6 283

You deserved it 2 390

Small is beautiful

By dickless wonder - 21/10/2023 10:00

Today, I met up with a girl I've been hanging out with a bunch recently. She said that we should be a couple, "unless you have a micropenis", then laughed. I actually do have a micropenis. I couldn't hold it together, and ran out of the bar, crying. FML

I agree, your life sucks 805

You deserved it 186

Bad start

By fuck but no fuck - 02/08/2013 19:44 - South Africa - Pretoria

Today, I finally felt ready to make love to my boyfriend for the first time. It all went great, until I tried putting the condom on him. In the process, I managed to nick his penis not once, but three times with my nails. His eyes brimmed with tears and he completely lost his erection. FML

I agree, your life sucks 52 142

You deserved it 28 447

moonshine_bek 2

Monday 1 March 2010 16:05

I don't care what anyone says, when it comes down to situations like this; size does really matter folks!

Neotoxx 5

Monday 1 March 2010 16:05

LOL I feel bad for that guy

Comments

hb4227 0

Tuesday 2 March 2010 2:37

first of all, ydi for trying to get laid right after divorce. and second, i'm Asian and i'm above average... just not big xD

oxaviero 0

Tuesday 2 March 2010 2:43

black ftw

BlueBomber 0

Tuesday 2 March 2010 3:44

Wow, the divorce must have been really traumatic for you. I'm so sorry to hear you couldn't get it on with a guy you had been humping in your mind while you waited for the legal process of getting rid of your loser husband to get wrapped up. Which is more than either of us can say for your new beau.

toto365 0

Tuesday 2 March 2010 4:25

maybe he drinks to much mountain dew which makes men and homosexuals dick get smaller

iplaymw2 0

Tuesday 2 March 2010 4:25

that is not true intirley...asians olny r 1in. on average than ze amewicans...dont know if its a sterio type or a fact but i heard indians are the tiniest

bezach 0

Tuesday 2 March 2010 4:39

americans...they can't love anyone if they can't have sex

Marino01 0

Tuesday 2 March 2010 4:46

DAMN!

SenGaeriel 3

Tuesday 2 March 2010 5:17

I must comment on this. I like a guy who has what I call a babydick. He's a great guy. He's hot, sexy, handsome, has a fine ass, great personality, and yet he has a babydick. I got no problem with it. It's cute.

SenGaeriel 3

Tuesday 2 March 2010 5:21

He says that condoms are way too big. I have to agree. Even the normal sized condoms are too big for average sized dicks.

mitch707 0

Tuesday 2 March 2010 6:41

Lolz how big is he?

SenGaeriel 3

Tuesday 2 March 2010 7:03

He's 2 3/4 inches hard.

SenGaeriel 3

Tuesday 2 March 2010 7:09

He also wants me to say that he masturbates only using his finger and thumb.

helloello 2

Tuesday 2 March 2010 7:37

2 3/4 inches hard? that's seriously got to be impossible. maybe in like 5% of guys in the world but that just sounds insane lol

SenGaeriel 3

Tuesday 2 March 2010 8:04

It's true, though. That is how big, or in this case, small, he is.

mitch707 0

Tuesday 2 March 2010 9:10

Wow tell him i feel sorry for him. But hes lucky to have someone like u. Sure makes me feel better though =P

Shyanha 0

Tuesday 2 March 2010 5:18

ROFL. I Never thought that would be an issue but . . . welcome to the 'I never lnew they 'came' that small club. FHL, too. Notuch he can do about it other than buff up the tongue. ;)