Weird, Abuse and Love: Get your act together

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Get your act together

By Z…… - 14/11/2012 00:43 - Australia

Today, my girlfriend snapped at me for being lazy and incompetent, and declared that if I was going to behave like a child, she would be treating me like one. This includes safety-proofing the house, talking to me like a 3-year-old and slapping me with a wooden spoon when I do something wrong. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 778

You deserved it 36 027

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Same thing different taste

Can't win

By Anonymous - 06/01/2024 18:00 - United States

Today, if I don't do work around the house, my girlfriend will call me a lazy pig and yell at me. If I do, she will yell because I didn't do it the right way. If I ask her to clarify the right way, she will call me a dumbass, give useless instructions, and work herself up into yelling at me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 764

You deserved it 264

Short nap

By Anonymous - 10/09/2024 06:00 - United States - Richmond

Today, my girlfriend told me I could sleep in. Twenty minutes later, she was banging on the door, yelling, "Get up, fat lazy fuck! It's seven o'clock, we have chores! You expect me to do everything for your worthless ass!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 496

You deserved it 122

By PanFace - 13/10/2009 06:54 - Australia

Today, I had an argument with my wife. I told her to get back in the kitchen. How does she respond? By doing what I told her to do, and returning to hit me with a frying pan. FML

I agree, your life sucks 11 121

You deserved it 121 387

The blame game

By stupid child - 24/03/2023 10:00

Today, I asked my girlfriend to stop her preschooler from playing in the kitchen when I'm cooking dinner. She bitched about how I'm "controlling and micromanaging". As she did so, he put his hands on the hot oven and screamed in pain. She then shrieked that it was my fault he hurt himself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 120

You deserved it 625

By Anonymous - 10/12/2012 18:09 - United States - Victorville

Today, my girlfriend felt bad about a rude comment she made to me, and asked me to insult her in return. I told her she was getting fat. Wrong move; now she's not speaking to me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 14 147

You deserved it 44 660

By what did I do? - 15/10/2015 19:30 - United States - San Francisco

Today, I proposed to my girlfriend. She slapped me in the face, stormed out and won't answer my calls. What the hell? FML

I agree, your life sucks 29 360

You deserved it 2 562

By Anonymous - 01/11/2014 18:23 - United States - Cincinnati

Today, my girlfriend came over to my place unannounced. She slapped me in the face, said, "You son of a bitch." and stormed off. I have no idea what that was for. FML

I agree, your life sucks 39 874

You deserved it 5 523

Sharing is caring

By T…… - 15/10/2023 00:02

Today, my girlfriend had a bitch fit because I snatched a couple of her fries for myself. She regularly raids my snacks, takes food off my plate, and has even stolen my work lunches, but a couple of fries is too much to ask. FML

I agree, your life sucks 716

You deserved it 145

By Anonymous - 31/03/2011 21:53 - United States

Today, my girlfriend tearfully complained that I was smothering her to death with my clinginess, and that I should learn to respect her boundaries. This is after she complained I wasn't giving her enough attention. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 896

You deserved it 5 089

Thanks dad

By Anonymous - 19/09/2013 17:32 - Canada - Brantford

Today, I took my girlfriend home to meet my parents. My dad was having a bad day and was rude from the outset, but things went to total hell when he started screaming that he'd "kill" our microwave if it didn't "shut the hell up". My girlfriend now thinks we're a family of abusive psychos. FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 891

You deserved it 3 329

Icyghost17 10

Wednesday 14 November 2012 8:46

I suggest you start throwing tantrums, refusing to eat your veggies, and demanding bedtime stories. If you can't beat em, join em!

MasterGamer591 13

Wednesday 14 November 2012 8:44

Talk to her like she is an old lady DO YOU UNDER....STAAAAAAAND miss

Comments

the_smart_way 10

Wednesday 14 November 2012 12:17

There's a website for that. Probably.

IsRaeliPrinCess 8

Wednesday 14 November 2012 12:19

As long if its not in front of people it wouldn't be humiliating.

bigdipper32 5

Wednesday 14 November 2012 12:27

ur a cuckold now!

Liamj774 36

Wednesday 14 November 2012 13:00

Even better, watch a potty training video and when it's over take a dump in the bathtub

FailingKing 4

Wednesday 14 November 2012 13:11

Dump dat bitch

krikoleets 4

Wednesday 14 November 2012 13:31

Kinky ;)

jazzmancarron 11

Wednesday 14 November 2012 13:37

this is where you force her out and change your locks

loserman67 35

Wednesday 14 November 2012 13:49

Run for your life! Get away from that crazy bitch. She thinks that the proper way to discipline a three-year old is to slap them with a wooden spoon? She's a ******* abuser. My advice to you is to get away from her asap. Unless of course you are lazy and incompetent, then you'll have to stay and endure her. So in that instance, I like the melt-down in the toy aisle at Wal-Mart scenairo.

emilyjgraham 34

Wednesday 14 November 2012 18:44

you know I'm sure she wouldn't smack her child with a wooden spoon. but if you're talking to a grown man and say you'll treat him like a child then you'll always say something like "you're not too old for me to pull your trousers down and smack you bum". I really just don't understand why everyone is getting upset with his girlfriends behaviour. it's funny!