Gross out competition

By shattysituation - 31/12/2012 22:36 - United States

Today, my girlfriend and I decided to try a new place to eat. On our way home we both had upset stomachs. As we raced into the house we realized neither of us could hold it any longer. Having only one bathroom, I let her go first. She exploded on the toilet and I exploded in my pants. FML
I agree, your life sucks 43 429
You deserved it 4 058
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Top comments

rlr386 8

Even though that sucks for you both, props to you for being a gentleman and letting her go first.

478 4

Comments

Maverick52 13

^ lol you know, cause he "exploded" in his pants. Ha ha like as in ejaculation. Ha as in... Ah forget it.

11 4
heartemopants 18

Try the bathtub next time. :)

8 4
robo_thunder 13

Chivalry is not dead

49 3
Dracoboxer357 35

29- If chivalry means needing washing your ass down to your ankles after wringing your underwear out in the toilet, I'm surprised it isn't. ;) But yes, I think Op measured up just fine in this....unfortunately situation. ;P

8 2
drew24 1

This sounds like true love!

10 1
Sunkistlover718 21

Cat's litterbox, bathtub, kitchen sink, neighbor's mailbox, outside behind the shed... Come on, OP! You had plenty of options!

7 2
twinmum_fml 6

Wtf is with all these stupid puns that people think are funny? THEY ARE NOT FUNNY! They are really stupid so please stop wasting your time and post something that is actually worth commenting!

5 6
stupidpplsuck 33

Oh? You mean like you and your ridiculous rant that has already been said and done? Cuz to me that seems like a comment that isn't worth posting.

2 3
twinmum_fml 6

It clearly needed to be said again because the first time it was said made very little difference! These sorts of jokes become intensely irritating!

4 1
Minibear453 2

Next time you can always use the backyard. Or go in a trashbag. Or you and your girlfriend can try to both fit on the toilet!

7 1
poccocurantes 7

Had to shit in a trash bag in the military.

7 1
Jenn50 19

I get the sense that there might not have been enough time to employ contingency measures. I'm picturing OP trying to rummage under the kitchen sink for trash bags with his knees clamped together, clammy with the cramps, screaming, "You just about done in there---AAAAAHHH! Too late!"

0 1