It's just hair it'll grow back

Time to cut it all off

I feel for ya OP.. The first time I went to get a haircut on my own I accidentally asked for one some how.. I guess you'll be wearing more hats now?

It sucks but you gotta be more specific sometimes. Also, maybe you shouldn't be going to this barber

Don't worry, OP. You won't look like a mushroom head anymore once your hair grows out.

I find that I always have to point out exactly what I do NOT want before I even say what I do want.. otherwise I always end up with a cut/color I hate. It sucks to have to remember to do that but at least it guarantees you don't get what you don't want.

You only have a problem if someone starts calling you coconut head. Then......well you're on your own.

That happened to me as well! I then had to go, to another hairdresser, to have my hair cut super short just so that it could grow back evenly

It's your fault because of how you explained it don't just say a little off the sides if you can't explain it better than show them a picture don't assume someone else is picturing the same haircut in their head as you are.

the great thing about being a guy is you can just shave your head and start over with a clean slate next time around.