Happy Valentine's Day

By henhouse - This FML is from back in 2015 but it's good stuff - Australia - Brunswick East

Spicy
Today, I lost my virginity. The most memorable aspect of it wasn't the fact that my boyfriend finished after two thrusts, but rather the fact that he first said, "The pilot has entered the cockpit." FML
I agree, your life sucks 32 577
You deserved it 3 828

Same thing different taste

Top comments

MikaykayUnicorn 36

Lemme tell a similar story. Happened about an hour ago. I attempted to lose my virginity to the most beautiful girl on earth. Couldn't get it up.

Comments

SaniK 17

I'm pretty sure he was using cheap humor to relieve the tension if if was his first time too. Girls put a lot of pressure on guys for performance and stamina so you can see how nerve racking your first few times can be especially if your uncercumsized...they can feel: everything.

OneFourNine 9

Did you teach him how to finish you off after he did? A hard-on is not required. Does he / do you know how to get a penis hard again in less than 60 seconds? Don't worry, with a bit of attention, sex does get better with experience. In the meantime - assuming that your boyfriend is young - tell him to jerk off 60 to 30 minutes before you have sex. That is a very old trick that actually works. It should give him some lasting power.

It seems you didn't enjoy your flight.

The flight attendant never came with the peanuts

OP, it may seem like a really bad thing right now, but a lot of people's first times are nowhere near perfect, since they're usually nervous. Don't sweat it! Although if him saying that bothered you, let him know. Having an open talk about your sex life is healthy and you can talk to him about your needs being met. (:

No the cockpit has entered the pilot

That's ****** awesome lol. However, he'll need more flight time to increase his flight time...so to speak

exoticDeath 20

There's always next time? Practice makes perfect.