Intimacy: He's got the moves

He's got the moves

By beccav23 - 25/10/2011 16:08 - United States

Today, my boyfriend thought it would be a good idea to viciously rip off my thong. My ass crack is numb. FML

I agree, your life sucks 36 391

You deserved it 7 493

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

You want a piece of me?

By littlepeepboo - 30/01/2018 01:30

Today my boyfriend tried to be sexy and rip off my underwear. Instead, he bit a chunk out of my hip. FML

I agree, your life sucks 5 119

You deserved it 447

Felt cute, might delete later

By nopanties - 04/03/2013 05:11 - United States - Durham

Today, my boyfriend ripped my panties trying to get them off. Not off me, off himself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 51 850

You deserved it 6 453

A for effort

By NotsexyEnough - 23/11/2009 03:06 - United States

Today, my boyfriend tried to be sexy and take off my clothes with his teeth. He ended up biting my leg. FML

I agree, your life sucks 20 507

You deserved it 6 490

You rang?

By thathurt500x - 26/06/2020 20:08

Today, my boyfriend's tooth got caught on my nipple ring and ripped it out. FML

I agree, your life sucks 2 000

You deserved it 572

Sensitive snowflake

By onepussytwopussy - 07/03/2014 19:47 - United Kingdom - Birmingham

Today, my boyfriend and I had sex for the first time, and I tried to be sexy by raking my nails down his back. I guess I did it a little too hard, because he shrieked in pain, leapt off me, and limped around the room cursing and whimpering. Mood ruined. FML

I agree, your life sucks 49 422

You deserved it 26 486

By Lilah - 19/02/2012 00:29 - Canada

Today, I was showing off my sexy new lingerie set to my boyfriend. While we were getting frisky, he got really into things and ripped it completely off my body, destroying it. It cost me $110. FML

I agree, your life sucks 31 909

You deserved it 19 541

By Sugao - 10/12/2008 07:48 - France

Today, during foreplay with my boyfriend, I put my legs around his neck. He pushed them away violently, shouting, "Bloody hell, it's prickling me!" I'd shaved the day before. FML

I agree, your life sucks 38 077

You deserved it 7 636

By megaladon - 28/06/2010 08:12 - United States

Today, my boyfriend and I were messing around. When he slipped his hand down my pants, he scratched my pubic hair and said "scruffy, scruffy, scruffy." FML

I agree, your life sucks 34 891

You deserved it 37 458

By fuck my arse - 08/08/2013 22:15 - United Kingdom - Reading

Today, my husband and I were fooling around, and things got heated. In the heat of things, I told him to tear my panties off. He took it literally and yanked at them with all his might. It's been two hours and I still can't walk straight. FML

I agree, your life sucks 53 505

You deserved it 19 561

Beauty standards

By Anonymous - 08/05/2023 03:00

Today, my boyfriend snuck up behind me while I was naked and whispered in my ear to bend over. I thought this was a lead up to doggy style but nope, he slapped a waxing strip on my exposed bum hole and ran off yelling, “No more hairy hole! No more hairy hole!” FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 684

You deserved it 524

Blackmail111 9

Tuesday 25 October 2011 22:02

He's climbin in yo windows..snatchin yo people up

Bblock 5

Tuesday 25 October 2011 22:03

Hmm i wonder why he wanted your ass crack numb....

Comments

tuckit 28

Sunday 22 June 2014 2:17

That's never a good idea.

namine120409 42

Monday 20 October 2014 15:08

Sexy in theory, painful in practice.

Slasher2977 19

Thursday 19 March 2015 2:25

Time for anal?

Keywords

Love Cheating Money Relatable Work Jealousy My ex Health Accident Medication ADHD Weather Snow Miscellaneous Embarrassing Awkward Relationship advice Am I overreacting? Weird AITA Dating Sleep Annoying Parents Mental health Furniture Kids Friends Gross Fight

The Top

Today, and for the past month, I've been feeling lightheaded from a breathing problem. I've now been prescribed a medication to help with my anxiety and my breathing issue, which would in turn help stop me from getting so lightheaded. The side effect of said medication: lightheadedness. FML

I agree, your life sucks 3 868

You deserved it 295

Today, I was denied food stamp assistance. Apparently, you need to work 20 hours a week while being a full time student to qualify or have a work study. I was recently suspended from my work study for calling off because my aunt died, and if I worked 20 hours a week, why would I need food stamps? FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 150

You deserved it 5 868

The Top

Today, I have a friend who has consumed almost every known drug in our country, but refuses to get the Covid vaccine, claiming that, "it contains the 5G, and I won't let them control me." FML

I agree, your life sucks 963

You deserved it 177

Today, my ten year-old son realized something. Beer is alcohol. People who drink a lot of alcohol are alcoholics. Therefore, I'm an alcoholic for drinking beer with dinner. He told everyone at his conservative private school and they tried to have an intervention. They pray for me every day. FML

I agree, your life sucks 68 819

You deserved it 12 943

Today, I was sick during the night and had to puke. I had no bucket or trashcan nearby, so I ended up puking on the floor. However, because it was so dark, I didn't notice my cat lying in the exact spot where I puked. She was not amused, giving me the mother of all death glares before she started puking herself. FML

I agree, your life sucks 465

You deserved it 145

Today, I walked in on my dad introducing his stuffed gorilla to his cat. FML

I agree, your life sucks 23 942

You deserved it 2 920

Today, I dropped my phone in the wet snow. I read that putting it in rice helps to get the water out. Three pieces of rice are now frozen into the power port, and I can't get the charger in. FML

I agree, your life sucks 43 106

You deserved it 13 818

Today, I was walking down the street to go to the movies, when I got punched in the back of the head. When I turned around, a stranger said, "HAHA! It's punch a random person day!" When I asked him why he chose me, he replied "You're ugly." FML

I agree, your life sucks 42 133

You deserved it 4 907