High emissions zone

By BodyElectric - This FML is from back in 2016 but it's good stuff

Today, I was checking my kitten's neutering stitches when he farted so hard that a stray piece of cat shit shot out and hit me in the eye. FML
I agree, your life sucks 18 142
You deserved it 3 898

Top comments

kaitlyn520 13

Awh man:( Sometimes cats are so oblivious, trying to help him out and he goes about his business. I'm sorry that happened to you.:(

Comments

Well, at least you're smart enough to neuter you pet!

TabooSushi 24

Hope you washed your face and flushed that eye out very well afterward, otherwise pink eye is in your future. It may be in your future regardless, but washing your face and flushing your eye out can diminish the chance of the bacteria hanging around long enough to infect.

Oh you bet your ass I did, imagine having to explain that story to a doctor. No thank you.

Congratulations, you have feline conjunctivitis.

why would your eye be so close to his sphincter? can't you see the stitches from a safer angle?

Good question. First of all, he's a kitten and so his tiny gonads are very small and hard to see. I also have quite terrible eyesight and so needed to get especially up close and personal. Second of all, this kitten produces gale-force winds since his digestive system is getting accustomed to eating kitten food instead of cockroaches and whatever else he could find in the cemetery I found him in. (No, that's not a joke, I mean I was actually in a cemetery and found a kitten and adopted him).

mermaidgirle 12

That's wonderful of you to take him in! My Pommy is a stray I found running lose and when no owners turned up after searching, I registered her as mine and she's my best girl now :)

Ugh. Can you believe that little piece of shit!?!?! ...I'll leave after that joke..

I laughed my ass off harder than I have at any other fml.