Embarrassing and Health: If I fits, I sits

If I fits, I sits

By fatlady - 07/03/2010 05:41 - United States

Today, my friend and I went to the park. I bet my friend I could fit into the swing that was sized for toddlers. I managed to fit in, but I couldn't get out. My friend had to call 911 to get me out. When they finally did, the fireman told me that fat ladies shouldn't try stuff like that. FML

I agree, your life sucks 10 001

You deserved it 39 398

Thanksgiving: Turkeys and Skids
Family meals that turn absurd, because Thanksgiving is also about laughing at little disasters. More…

Previous FML Next FML

Same thing different taste

By Anonymous - 27/02/2010 03:01 - United States

Today, I went to the park with my friend and we decided to swing. While we were swinging, we decided to jump off backwards. All would have worked out fine if my pants hadn't gotten caught on the metal of the swing, leaving my bare butt exposed. The man who was in the park with his daughter left. FML

I agree, your life sucks 9 228

You deserved it 23 617

By BabyButt - 09/04/2014 17:50 - United States - Honolulu

Today, I went on a date with my boyfriend to our local park, and I playfully climbed into one of the baby swings. I planned on having him push me, not getting stuck and having to be cut free from the seat while he laughed. FML

I agree, your life sucks 25 625

You deserved it 41 589

Bounce off

By clumsy girl - 25/09/2023 12:30 - United States - Austin

Today, I embraced my inner child and went to a trampoline park with friends. I was having a blast until I attempted a somersault and ended up bouncing right into a group of screaming toddlers. I was escorted out by a concerned parent. FML

I agree, your life sucks 274

You deserved it 745

Sorry, but…

By Anonymous - 28/07/2019 14:00

Today, I was at a waterpark with my friends, waiting in line for about 45 minutes to go on the biggest ride there. When it was finally our turn, the lifeguard at the top pulled me over and measured me to see if I was tall enough. I wasn't. FML

I agree, your life sucks 1 881

You deserved it 472

By Apple - 12/06/2011 17:54 - United States

Today, I was at my friend's house, and I asked if I could try on one of her dresses. It was a little snug, but I got it on. When it came time to take it off though, it wouldn't budge. My friend and her mom had to cut it off me. FML

I agree, your life sucks 19 513

You deserved it 34 842

By bathroomseww - 12/05/2009 07:19 - United States

Today, I went out to a nice restaurant for my friend's birthday. I went to the bathroom and heard the woman in the other stall crying. She couldn't pull her underwear up over her obese, old-lady ass because her arms don't reach that far anymore. I was the only one there. I had no choice. FML

I agree, your life sucks 82 162

You deserved it 12 404

By xxxdwangelaxxx - 18/04/2009 21:08 - United States

Today, I went swinging with my friend at the park. Seeing a few cute guys playing basketball, I tried to act cute, laughing loudly and letting my hair fly all over the place. Just as they look over the swing broke. I fell on my face, my jeans sliding down, mooning them. They laughed hysterically. FML

I agree, your life sucks 44 130

You deserved it 34 638

By warp_routine - 31/03/2009 14:17 - United States

Today, I got on an elevator with a woman and her child. I was the first one on. When she stepped on, the capacity alarm went off. As she left she told her daughter that's why fat people shouldn't be allowed in public. I'm 145 lbs. She was twice my size. I got called fat by a hippopotamus. FML

I agree, your life sucks 200 955

You deserved it 13 910

Supportive

By short&stout - 26/08/2017 20:00

Today, I took the kids to the pool. I'm short and 20lbs overweight but they talked me into it and I put on a swimsuit for the first time in 10 years. As soon as we got there, a girl my height but a good 150lbs heavier said, "It's so nice to see another big girl in a two-piece!" FML

I agree, your life sucks 4 266

You deserved it 729

By ow my kidneys - 14/07/2015 10:33 - Germany - Bad Oeynhausen

Today, I went down a water slide. Halfway through, I got stuck behind some kids who were blocking the tube. Seconds later, a big-boned lady crashed into my back. Her solution to break the blockade was to start kicking my back repeatedly as hard as she could. The kids still wouldn't move. FML

I agree, your life sucks 30 901

You deserved it 1 928

Aurik 0

Sunday 7 March 2010 12:33

Congratulations! Good job wasting taxpayers money! Put down the cheesecake and smarten up.

lionandthelamb61 9

Sunday 7 March 2010 12:30

911? they have better things to do than un- wedge fat asses from toddler swings. idiot

Comments

LilaBear 1

Tuesday 9 March 2010 14:47

1) YDI for being stupid 2) 911? Seriously? I dunno about the US, but in Australia, our emergency number (000) is reserved for LIFE-THREATENING emergencies. Not "my friend is stuck in a toddlers' swing". I thought that was the same in the US. At the very most your friend could have called another friend for help, or MAYBE the non-emergency number for the fire department. (If the US has that... Australia does.) 3) You must be weak as a toddler if you or your friend couldn't yank the swing off your butt. You got it in there, you can damn well get it out. I've seen people "stuck" in toddlers' swings... really not that hard to get them out of it.

hberri331 18

Wednesday 3 June 2015 21:50

There is a non emergency number but if they were stupid enough to climb into a toddler swing them why would they be smart enough to call the non emergent number?!

dave666_fml 0

Wednesday 10 March 2010 1:39

WIN FOR THE FIREMEN

ughpplppl 0

Wednesday 10 March 2010 7:44

I am sure the fireman did not actually call her fat. She just wants a pity party because she feels stupid for going into a toddler swing.

Spenny1515 0

Monday 15 March 2010 17:30

I did something like that once, but was more careful about it. Though I understand sort of, YDI

fartsinyourfood 0

Monday 22 March 2010 4:13

Put the fork down and maybe it'll work out better next time. YDI, fatty.

Tori990 0

Monday 5 April 2010 9:10

I did that once except im not fat. My thighs just got stuck in the holes. A lady next to me had to help me out with her kids' stroller. FYL cause I know how that feels and it SUCKS!

danii1996 0

Wednesday 14 July 2010 22:27

ROFLMFAO! ur stupid

KillerHos 0

Thursday 4 November 2010 18:24

Same thing happened to me

jskibabe22 4

Friday 31 December 2010 17:33

this happened to me except i didnt have to call 911. im a skinny 14 yr old, so my friends flipped the swing upsidr down and pulled me out. it still hurt tho